


Wish In A Bottle

by RensSaxophone



Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:08:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 42,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25640359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RensSaxophone/pseuds/RensSaxophone
Summary: "Write your wish on a piece of parchment and place it in a little bottle. If you let it flow with the sea, someday your wish will come true." - Regret Message (Kagamine Rin)
Relationships: Ichinose Tokiya/Kurosaki Ranmaru
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

Tokiya hated the ocean. It was large, it was terrifying, and he had been dragged to a beach side house by his mother who thought that it was a pretty place to live, and he was constantly sent outside because their beach house was small and she often wanted alone time that she couldn’t have if Tokiya were in the house. 

Tokiya gave the ocean a very large berth, until he had overheard his classmates speaking about a ritual. 

Well- _ritual_ wasn’t quite the word for it. More like a charm. 

If you wrote a wish on a piece of paper and slipped it into a bottle and threw the bottle into the sea, your wish may one day come true. 

It was silly, Tokiya thought, even at the age of eight. But that didn’t stop him from going home to find an empty jam bottle in the trash can to wash out and keep in his room until he could decide on his wish. In very careful writing he writes his wish. 

_I wish for a friend._

That sounded sad, and it makes Tokiya frown, but Tokiya promises himself that it isn’t likely to be found. It’s probably going to sink deep into the ocean where no one will ever find it. 

Tokiya seals it into the bottle and he heads out to the ocean- for the first time without being sent. 

Tokiya stares hard at the ocean narrowing his eyes. He glances around him, to make sure that no one sees anything, and then he grips the jar tight and throws it. 

It’s a weak throw, but when it his the water, he hears something that doesn’t sound like a _splash_. 

“Oi!” A voice roars. It’s boyish, too high to be an adults, and a boy lifts himself from further in the ocean, with grey, messy hair stuck to his face, an angry expression, one hand rubbing his head and the other holding Tokiya’s glass jar. 

Tokiya stumbles forward, forgetting that he’s wearing pants and shoes but desperate to apologize to this boy. “I’m sorry! I had no idea anyone was out here-”

Tokiya stills, a few feet from the boy, because now that he was closer he was noticing what wasn’t right. 

The boy had fins where his ears should be, and there were red scales scattered over his body in patches, shining in the sun. When the waves move, Tokiya can catch just a bit more of the boy from his hips down, and it’s _all_ scales. Tokiya can’t see the rest of what’s beneath the waves. Realizing that the boy wasn’t _human_ makes Tokiya stumble back, falling into the waves and drenching himself further. 

The boy scowls. He can’t be much older than Tokiya- but that’s just an assumption from Tokiya. Obviously this boy wasn’t human. There was no telling how old he actually was. 

“And why are you throwing things in the ocean?” The boy narrows his eyes, raising the jar. Tokiya flinches back, even though the boy had made no moves to throw it back at him.

“I’m not littering! I swear!” Tokiya peeks from under his arm, but now his face is beginning to turn bright red. “It’s… you throw a bottle into the ocean with a wish inside of it. To make it come true.”

“That’s dumb.” The boy grumbles. 

“I can take it back.” Tokiya offers. He isn’t sure what else he can do. The boy huffs. 

“What? No. _You_ hit me with it. It’s mine now.”

Tokiya is incredibly confused. What on Earth could this boy want with his wish? Or maybe it was for the jar? But that wasn’t all that spectacular either. “Okay?”

The boy scowls, but he goes back under the water, disappearing, the bottle still in his hand. He doesn’t resurface. 

Tokiya gets a lecture when he comes home, soaking wet. 

And the lectures start becoming more and more frequent because sometimes when Tokiya gets sent to the beach, the boy is there. 

It’s only after their third visit that Tokiya finally learns that the boy’s name is Ranmaru. 

Tokiya begins sitting on a rock near enough to the water that Ranmaru can stay in the water and Tokiya can stay dry. It’s nearing their fifth visit when Tokiya begins to nervously twist his hands together. 

“Ranmaru?” Tokiya’s voice is soft. “You have a tail, right?”

Ranmaru gives him a blank look. 

Tokiya goes red. “What does it look like?”

Ranmaru’s eyebrow raises, but then he flips over, to begin to pull himself backwards out of the water. 

“Ranmaru!”

“Either you’re comin’ down here or I’m going up there.”

“I don’t know how to swim.” Tokiya admits. 

“Then I’m going up there.”

Ranmaru pulls himself onto the sand. The water is still hitting the end of his tail, but he’s mostly on land and Tokiya’s eyes land immediately on Ranmaru’s tail. It’s long and slender, covered in red, shiny scales. The fins along it are ribbon like and the fins that make up the bottom of his tail are large, the tips ending about shoulder length apart. 

“Woah.” Tokiya’s eyes are wide. Ranmaru’s tail moves, lifting at the end just slightly, slapping back down on the sand. It’s very clear that Ranmaru is proud of it.”Is it hard, being on land?”

“I can’t move around right. But I can breathe water _and_ air.” Ranmaru has an almost smug expression on his face, clearly feeding off of Tokiya’s interest.

Ranmaru finds himself spending some time in the shallow water, the water going no further than mid-tail, and Tokiya sometimes joins him at the cost of a lecture from his mother. 

And then Ranmaru disappears. Tokiya spends nearly a year, coming back to the beach to search for him. 

Tokiya had developed a crush on the boy. He wasn’t sure if it were right, if it could _work_ , but he had fallen, and for being a kid, he had fallen _hard_.

Years pass, and Ranmaru doesn’t show up. When Tokiya starts high school, he begins to believe that he had made Ranmaru up. 

Tokiya still isn’t a very popular person in school. He’s quiet, and sometimes can come across as cold or rude and kids tend to avoid him. 

But he comes across a glass soda bottle that he had bought with some of the money he had saved up, purely for the bottle, and he finds himself with a piece of paper and a pen, sitting on his bed. 

_I wish for my friend back_. 

It may have also been a dumb wish, but considering his first one was as well, Tokiya would just handle it. He rolls the paper up, recaps the bottle, and he makes his way to the beach. 

Tokiya holds onto the bottle with a tight grip and he closes his eyes. He forces down any hope that he may not have made Ranmaru up- he tells himself that he’s doing this for himself, not to find Ranmaru. 

Tokiya’s actual wish proves him wrong. 

Tokiya throws the bottle before he can think about it. 

The bottle lands in the ocean with a splash. Tokiya waits for nearly two hours. He watches the bottle be swallowed by the waves and he loses sight of it. 

His clothes are dry, if a bit sandy, when he returns. 

When he turns nineteen his mother dies. 

It’s hard on Tokiya. There were things about his mother that he hated. He hated that she was overbearing, and he hated that they weren’t very close emotionally, despite their close proximity. He hated that they stayed in that ocean house for her, because every time Tokiya looks at the ocean he feels pain spread through his chest. 

But she was his mother and he had never known anything else. They may not have been close, but she really was all that he had. His coworkers were coworkers and he left high school alone. He had never once dated, he had never had a friend in his home- and now that his mother was gone, he was by himself. 

Tokiya spends a day in his bed, curled into a ball, not sleeping or eating- just staring at the wall. 

The next morning, he pulls himself up and he heads to his wardrobe and digs in the drawer for the clean, empty bottle he had kept for himself, just in case he needed it. 

Today, he supposed he did. 

Tokiya takes a piece of paper. His wish is desperate. It’s simple. It’s hopeless, even as he writes it. 

_I wish I wasn’t alone._

His wishes have yet to come true, but perhaps the third time will be the charm. Tokiya can’t even manage a dry smile at the thought, as he heads to the beach. 

As Tokiya stares at the waves, he thinks about how he never had learned how to swim. It was dangerous, to send a child to the water with no knowledge of how to keep himself afloat, but his mother was an independent woman and Tokiya had grown to be an independent child. He wouldn’t fool himself into believing that she wanted him dead, but she must have trusted that he wasn’t stupid, as most children were. 

Tokiya rolls the bottle in his hand, closes his eyes, and he throws it. 

Tokiya isn’t sure what he’s waiting for, because he doesn’t watch the bottle. He stands, still and quiet for a long moment, and then his knees give out. 

On the sand, he cries. He bends, covering his face with his hands and his sobs turn into wails that wrack his body. He’s close enough to the water that he feels the water brush against the top of his head where his forehead presses against the sand, but he still doesn’t lift his head. 

Tokiya finally has to, when the water goes further and covers his face, and he lifts his head, coughing the water out of his mouth, though his coughing gets worse when the water and his sobs and the sand on his tongue all blend together, but through his tears he almost thinks he sees something moving in the shallow water, too big to be coincidental. 

It’s hard to see through the blue, but he thinks it may have been a streak of red. 

Tokiya rubs at his burning face angrily, but it’s too hard to get himself together so he doesn’t. 

He only pulls himself out of his stupor when there’s a _person_ in front of him. 

Tokiya had never seen this _man_ , but there was enough of the boy he once knew in him that Tokiya knows him immediately. His hair was just a bit longer, and just a bit shaggier. His face was sharper and he had grown, both body and tail. The ribbons where his knees should be were longer, more elegant, and his tail span was now wider than his shoulders. 

His eyes were the same. 

Pink and grey. Tokiya had asked him about it, once upon a time, and Ranmaru had told him that if the unnatural eyes surprised him, he might want to look lower. 

In other words- they were natural. 

So many feelings flood through Tokiya. 

There’s hurt and anger- Ranmaru is here, but why did he leave? Why had he left Tokiya, if he were real? 

There’s shock. Tokiya had convinced himself he _wasn’t_ real.

There’s relief, to see him back. To see him at all. And that’s what makes Tokiya lunge forward to wrap his arms around Ranmaru’s neck. Ranmaru holds himself up on one arm, raising the other to lay against Tokiya’s back, but it’s hesitant. 

“You’re real.” Tokiya’s voice is hoarse. It cracks. He hasn’t caught his breath, either, but he’s just holding onto Ranmaru. “You were gone so long.” Tokiya buries his face in the crook of Ranmaru’s neck. “What did I do?”

Ranmaru’s entire body tenses. Stills. 

“You didn’t do anythin’.” Ranmaru’s voice is deep, and his statement is so gruff. “It wasn’t you.”

“Then why?” 

“We’ll talk about it.” Ranmaru promises, his voice grim. “But not now.”

“Why?”

Tokiya feels as if he’s reverted- but he also believes he’s earned it. To say that this period of his life is _hard_ would be an understatement. 

“Yer upset.” Ranmaru says simply. “‘S why I came out.”

“I’ve been upset before. You haven’t come back.”

“You’ve never been this upset.”

“...My mom died.” Tokiya whispers. It’s almost surprising that Ranmaru can hear him over the waves. “She’s gone and I’m by myself.”

As another round of sobs wracks Tokiya’s body, he slumps, and Ranmaru has to catch him. Tokiya can see the way Ranmaru’s tail writhes, trying to move, so that he isn’t supporting them both on one arm. When he bends his tail beneath him, resting on what would be his hip, he can use his free hand to help hold Tokiya up. 

Tokiya wonders if this is right- to react like this to a man he hasn’t seen in years. But there’s no part of him that wants to pull away, and Ranmaru isn’t pushing him away, either. 

Tokiya cries until he’s cried himself out. This was the first time Tokiya had cried over his mother’s death, though he thinks that some of these tears are for Ranmaru, now. 

Tokiya _was_ angry. He was angry that Ranmaru had abandoned him with no goodbye. But he wasn’t angry enough to consider sending him away. He wasn’t angry enough to want Ranmaru to leave. He was angry and he wanted Ranmaru to _stay_. 

“You _didn’t_ leave.” Tokiya accuses weakly. He feels like the energy has been drained from his body. “You’ve been here and you’ve ignored me.”

“It wasn’t right.” Ranmaru gruffs, and then he gives a heavy sigh. “Still don’t know if it is. We’re not the same, Tokiya.”

“Obviously.” Tokiya’s eyes narrow in a glare, but Ranmaru can’t see it- Tokiya hasn’t pulled away. 

“You can’t even swim.” Ranmaru says. There’s some insistence, but it’s mostly explanation. “You don’t even like the ocean. ...I didn’t think you’d be all that torn up, after a while. Can barely believe you remember me.”

Tokiya gives a weak thump against Ranmaru’s shoulder with a closed fist. “You’re my friend. And my friend just up and disappeared and never bothered to tell me anything about it.”

Ranmaru falls quiet, and Tokiya does, too. There’s something Ranmaru’s not telling him, but Tokiya knows that there’s something he’s not telling Ranmaru, either.

They’re still until the sun begins to set. Until Tokiya begins shivering when the water laps against his already soaked pants. 

There would be no more scoldings for it. 

“Is this the last time I’m going to see you?” Tokiya says softly.

“...If you throw a bottle, I’ll show up.”

Ranmaru stays true to his word. 

Tokiya’s first bottle comes slowly, because he isn’t sure what to write inside of it. 

Finally, he settles on _I wish that my friend will keep his word_.

It’s only a moment after Tokiya sends the bottle into the ocean that Ranmaru surfaces, and that starts to become the norm. 

Tokiya switches his wishes around, and at some point they stop becoming wishes and start becoming stories. 

Tokiya goes through a lot of bottles, calling Ranmaru. 

“I’m sick of drinking soda.” Tokiya sighs, laying on the sand of the beach. Ranmaru is on his stomach in ankle deep water. “But I haven’t found a place that sells empty bottles.”

“...I could get you some.” Ranmaru offers. Tokiya’s attention turns to Ranmaru immediately as he narrows his eyes. 

“And where have you found a surplus of bottles?”

“Ocean’s a big place, y’know.”

Ranmaru meets Tokiya’s glare with a calm expression. Tokiya doesn’t believe him, but in the end, knowing that he could get more bottles without _buying_ more was nice. And the less bottles in the ocean, the better, he was sure. Especially if Ranmaru were somehow telling the truth and they really were that easy to find.

The next day, Tokiya’s given three empty bottles, just left out on the beach for him, half buried in sand to keep them still. Tokiya sighs and shakes his head, but he’s wearing a smile as he returns inside.

It’s a month later when Tokiya sits down in front of his table, takes a deep breath, and begins to write. 

_I am well aware that we aren’t the same, but I’ve cared for you for years, and it was painful, being separated from you. You fulfilled the very first wish I had ever made, and I would have no trouble braving the oceans if it means that I get to stay with you for longer. Thank you for staying. I love you. I love you as the person that you are, and I love you as a cherished friend, and I love you as more. You’ve told me that you’re not sure if it’s right, but I can’t say I agree. I think that my feelings are absolutely right. And no matter what your feelings are towards me, I’m sure they’re right too._

_I wish to spend more time with you. In any way that you’ll have me._

Tokiya stashes the bottle after he slips his confession in. He wasn’t ready to send that one just quite yet. 

The next time that Tokiya had gone to the beach, it was because there were a couple of drunk teenagers on the bit of land directly behind his house. He just wanted to get some sleep, but they were being rowdy and annoying and he wanted them off of his property. He sighs, giving himself a quiet pep-talk to get them off of his land. 

“Excuse me.” Tokiya clears his throat. It’s clear that all four of them, the three men and one woman, are hammered. “You’re on my property. I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

“Chill out man.” The girl says. “It’s a free beach.”

“Anywhere else is.” Tokiya says sternly. “But this area of the beach falls on the property lines of my house. Please find somewhere else.” 

One of the bigger men walks up to Tokiya, and Tokiya straightens up. Not that it matters, because the man is still bigger than he is. “She told you to chill, bro.”

“And I-”

Tokiya is cut off when he’s shoved- and he’s pushed towards the water. He loses his footing on the sand and lands ass down in the damp sand. The man that shoved him and one of the others share a look, and then they get a grin. “Swimming’s relaxing, right?” One man taunts. Tokiya tries to scramble to his feet, but he’s having trouble getting purchase until he’s grabbed by both arms. 

“I can’t-” 

Tokiya doesn’t get to finish before they swing him, to throw him deeper into the water. The girl is almost howling with laughter, and the other two men join in. 

It would be an attack no matter what, but it wouldn’t be nearly as big of a deal if Tokiya _could_ swim. But before he could stand to make his way back, a wave crashes over his head and he’s pulled back further by the undertow and flailing his arms isn’t lifting him. He nearly gets his head to break the water, but when he tries to breathe in he finds that he’s not high enough and inhales mostly water. His chest burns, and his eyes burn, and he’s already getting tired, trying desperately to get above water. His clothes are weighing him down and the water is so cold that his muscles are beginning to ache first. 

When Tokiya sees something heading towards him, it’s blurry, and he’s scared that he’s imagining things. But arms wrap around his waist and bring him above land. As soon as Tokiya is above water, he begins coughing so hard that he can’t hold onto his savior, but he isn’t let go. Tokiya gets confirmation that it is Ranmaru when another wave comes up and Ranmaru turns, holding Tokiya against him. Ranmaru isn’t forced down by the wave, but he does take the brunt of it against his back, trying to keep Tokiya from getting hit with it. 

When Tokiya finally manages to start taking in air again, though he’s still breathing heavily and shaking, finally managing to wrap his arms around Ranmaru’s neck, Tokiya glances behind them, but he can’t see the shore. How far out had he gotten?

Tokiya is almost surprised when he feels Ranmaru’s tail wrap around him. He doesn’t seem to have much trouble staying upright, even without full use of his tail, but it keeps Tokiya anchored to him. Ranmaru’s hand holds Tokiya’s head to his shoulder. It isn’t until Tokiya’s breathing becomes normal again that Ranmaru finally unwraps his tail from Tokiya. 

“I’m gonna bring you back.” Ranmaru mumbles. “Hold on.”

Tokiya does. He hides his face in Ranmaru’s neck. Tokiya had seen first hand how fast that Ranmaru could be, but he was moving slower now so that Tokiya’s head stays above water. 

The teenagers are gone- likely having run off when they didn’t see Tokiya resurface. Ranmaru settles himself down in water no more than ankle deep, but he doesn’t let go of Tokiya and Tokiya holds onto him, too. 

“How the fuck did you get that far out?” Ranmaru’s eyebrows furrow. 

“I was thrown.” Tokiya’s voice is shot and his throat is sore. “It was a group of kids that were obviously drunk. I asked them off my property and they threw me in the water.”

Ranmaru sighs, but it’s angry. “I’ll keep them off.” He promises. “One way ‘r another. I’ll keep an eye out.”

“I think they think I’m dead. I don’t think they’ll come back.”

“For their sake, they’d better not.” Ranmaru scowls. Tokiya grows silent until Ranmaru finally sighs. “You think you can make it to your house?”

Tokiya nods. Ranmaru can’t help him stand, but he does what he can. “...Goodnight, Ran.”

“Night, Toki.”

Ranmaru watches Tokiya enter his house, and when Tokiya checks the window again later, Ranmaru is still keeping watch. 

It’s only the next day that Tokiya throws another bottle into the ocean. 

This one is his confession. 

It takes Ranmaru longer to surface than it usually does, but when he does, he’s serious, and he’s holding a bottle. Tokiya is sitting by the edge of the waves, but Ranmaru moves out of his water, dropping the bottle on the sand as he does, but he pulls himself closer in one fluid motion and cups Tokiya’s cheek with the other and he kisses him. 

Ranmaru’s kiss is rough, and it tastes like salt, and Tokiya is much less dry than he was just a moment before- but he kisses back. Ranmaru’s voice is almost a bit breathless when he pulls back.

“Did you mean it?”

Tokiya gives a half-nervous, half-teasing smile. “Did you read it?”

Ranmaru clicks his tongue, but his free hand slides to the back of his hair. “...I usually read yer wishes.” He admits in a grumble. 

“I know. You’ve been giving me back the same bottles I’ve already thrown in.” Ranmaru hasn’t moved far from him, and Tokiya has no problems wrapping his arms around Ranmaru. The position that they’ve found themselves in is just a bit awkward, because Tokiya’s legs are spread, his knees resting on either side of Ranmaru’s waist, just above Ranmaru’s tail. Ranmaru is leaning against Tokiya and Tokiya is just holding him there. “...I take it you like me back?” There’s an almost shy tone that Tokiya can’t quite hide from his tone. 

Ranmaru snorts. “Yeah, Toki. I like you.”

“Good.” Tokiya gets quiet for a long moment, and his voice is soft when he speaks again. “I’m glad you came back.”

“...I’m sorry I left.”

It’s only a few weeks later when Tokiya uses a bit of his small amount of pocket money to buy a bathing suit. He couldn’t swim, and he doubted he’d learn anytime soon, but it wouldn’t hurt him, to sit down in the area of water Ranmaru usually did, and at least this way his clothes wouldn’t soak through. 

Ranmaru raises an eyebrow when Tokiya comes out in his bathing suit. 

Normally, Tokiya would wear a shirt with it, but the point of the shorts were for _less_ of his clothes to smell like salt water. 

And fish. 

Now that Tokiya and Ranmaru were more accustomed to getting close to each other, Tokiya normally smelled like him- like ocean, and salt and fish. It wasn’t Tokiya’s favorite smell, but he’d deal with it, for Ranmaru. 

Tokiya does have to take a second to appreciate that Ranmaru _isn’t_ human, because Ranmaru does look over Tokiya but his eyes don’t stick on Tokiya’s chest. 

Tokiya hated being shirtless. He wasn’t in a bad shape- but he still didn’t like people looking at his body. But to Ranmaru, _clothes_ weren’t normal. There was no sexualization in Tokiya’s chest because Ranmaru was used to it, and it really did help Tokiya’s nerves. Ranmaru watches him impatiently, the fins at the bottom of his tail flicking and raising from the water, waiting for him to get into the water.

He seems a bit confused, when Tokiya smiles at him, though Tokiya does move to sit down in the water. 

“What?”

“Nothing.” Tokiya hums. “You’re cute.”

“Huh?”

They’ve moved to a large rock that’s in shallow water to lean against it, and Tokiya leans further into Ranmaru’s side. “When you wait for me. It’s cute.” 

Ranmaru just clicks his tongue. 

“Why’d it take you so long ‘t stop comin’ fully dressed?”

Tokiya shifts, hiding his face. It was mostly because Ranmaru’s eyes always stuck on Tokiya’s face when Tokiya started blushing and he was definitely blushing now. “It’s strange for me to be in… any state of undress in front of anyone. Especially in front of you. I know it isn’t really the same- it’s not strange for you, but it is for me.”

“Dunno why.”

“...Chests on women are much more sexualized, but men’s are, too, to an extent.”

Ranmaru seems to take a moment on the word _sexualized_ , and then he shrugs. “You’re hot. But you’re hot with a shirt on, too.”

“Ran!” Tokiya’s flush is down to his neck, but he’s laughing. “You can’t just… say that!”

“Why not?” Ranmaru pulls him closer, to the point that Tokiya finds himself needing to flip over, to straddle Ranmaru’s lap. He doesn’t often touch Ranmaru’s tail, but the smooth scales against his legs doesn’t startle him. Ranmaru’s catches Tokiya by the chin before Tokiya can manage to hide his face in Ranmaru’s shoulder. “I’m not lying.”

“Ran.” If Tokiya could, he’d hide his face, because he can see Ranmaru taking in how red his face is and it isn’t helping. “You just… can’t.”

“Oh?” Ranmaru watches his face, and he grins. “So you’re shy, huh?” Ranmaru pulls Tokiya closer so that he can flip them. Ranmaru rests with his hips between Tokiya’s legs, hovering over him on the rock. Tokiya’s eyes widen, his hands finding Ranmaru’s arms when Ranmaru ducks his head to kiss Tokiya’s neck. He does it again when he feels Tokiya’s breath shake, and then he finds a spot that makes Tokiya _shudder_ which makes Ranmaru focus on it. 

Tokiya’s hands find Ranmaru’s hair, and he can almost feel Ranmaru’s smugness when Tokiya almost holds his head there. His flush is down to his shoulders, but his reserve is slowly leaving. Ranmaru seems happy to continue, to find more spots. When Ranmaru gets just a bit lower, he finds another spot- alerted this time because Tokiya can’t bite his lip in time to avoid the noise that sounds too much like a moan. Ranmaru raises his head, and he looks even more smug than Tokia thought he would. Ranmaru moves to hold himself up with one hand, to move his other to the outside of Tokiya’s thigh, just above his shorts. His hand moves down Tokiya’s thigh, under his shorts. 

Ranmaru leans forward, nipping at Tokiya’s bottom lip, and Tokiya’s voice is breathless when Ranmaru pulls back enough for Tokiya to talk, his hands still laced in Ranmaru’s hair. “How are you so good at this?”

Ranmaru laughs, but then he drops back down to prepare to pick back up on Tokiya’s shoulder where he had left off, answering before he does. “We’re not that different, Toki. ‘Cept I think my kind’s a little less discreet with their affection. I see couples all over each other all the time. Dunno any special spots specifically but-” Ranmaru pauses long enough to nibble at the spot that had made Tokiya moan and this time he gets a sigh. “You’re helpin’ me figure ‘em out. Not so shy now, huh?” 

Tokiya huffs. “Is that really what brought this on?”

“The way you were hidin’ made me think you might show up next time wearin’ a shirt again. Tryin’ to give you a reason not to. Now hush. I’m enjoyin’ this-” Ranmaru smirks. “And clearly you are, too.” 

Tokiya does, as Ranmaru continues. He’s incredibly meticulous, but he finds a few more spots that get Tokiya to make some noise, paying special attention to those, and when Tokiya thinks he’s finally run out of skin, he returns to the spots that are more sensitive. 

“Jesus, Ran, how-?”

“I’m good at remembering things.” Ranmaru says smuggly, but he finally turns them again, holding tightly onto Tokiya as he flips. 

“You’re like an alligator.” Tokiya mumbles. He’s lying on top of Ranmaru at this point, but Ranmaru hasn’t let him go so Tokiya just relaxes on him. 

“Huh?”

“Think that’s what they do.” Tokiya mumbles. “Or maybe crocodiles. They grab on and they do these barrel rolls to drown people. ...Maybe not that last part but-”

Ranmaru snorts. “I get what you’re sayin’ now.” Ranmaru assures, though he seems amused. “I’ve never seen an alligator ‘r crocodile. Think I know what they are, but they don’t really frequent the oceans.”

“They’re not really beach dwellers, no.” Tokiya gets quiet, but his hand moves to pet through the ends of Ranmaru’s hair. “...No one’s touched me before. ...Even before this, my friendly interactions with you were more than anyone really did. ...It’s nice. Thank you, Ran.”

“I’ve gotta ask. Was I right? That you were probably gonna change yer mind ‘n put on a shirt next time?”

Tokiya sighs. “...You were.”

“Did I change your mind?” 

“You know the answer. I can hear it in your voice. ...You did, alright?”

Ranmaru makes a pleased noise. “Good. And just so you know-” Ranmaru’s hand trails up Tokiya’s back, starting from just above his shorts. “It’s pretty normal fer my kind ‘t go shirtless, yeah- but you’re thinkin’ pretty high of us. We do it because clothes ‘r too hard ‘t wear and too hard to get. Women usually find somethin’ ‘t cover up a ‘lil. What I’m tryin’ ‘t say is that seein’ you without a shirt is fuckin’ sexy.”

If Tokiya hadn’t spent so long blushing earlier, or if Ranmaru hadn’t just spent the better part of an hour doting on him, he may have reacted more. Instead, he just gives a soft huff and it gets a chuckle out of Ranmaru. Tokiya finally relents. “I guess I get it.” He sighs. “I didn’t think about it much when I was a kid, but I can’t lie. You being shirtless is always a nice sight.”

Tokiya stays until it starts to get cold, and then he begrudgingly leaves. But when he comes back two days later, he doesn’t wear a shirt. 

It’s nearly a month later when Tokiya notices strands of braided seaweed around Ranmaru’s hips, almost like a slanted belt. Tokiya had tried to question Ranmaru about it but Ranmaru wouldn’t tell him why he was wearing it. 

The next time they had visited together, Ranmaru had strung some shells to it. 

It isn’t until Ranmaru has the seaweed nearly decked out with shells that Tokiya finally questions him again. 

“A new fashion statement?” 

Ranmaru rolls his eyes. “No.”

“Then why? And why is it growing? And why are they all blue and purple?”

“You ask a lotta questions.”

“And you don’t give many answers.”

Ranmaru chuckles and then ruffles Tokiya’s hair. “Next time you come visit I’ll tell you what’s goin’ on.”

Tokiya is impatient- because now his thoughts are stuck on the shells and why Ranmaru is collecting them. 

When he meets back up with Ranmaru, Ranmaru is twirling something between his fingers. Tokiya’s eyes drop to his belt, but there are less shells on it now. When he walks closer to Ran, he doesn’t sit yet, assuming that they’ll be going to the rock, but Ranmaru doesn’t move. 

“Sit down ‘ere fer a minute.”

Tokiya’s eyebrows raise, but he does. Ranmaru is already sitting as well, but now that Tokiya is close enough, he sees that it’s some of the shells, wound in seaweed. 

“Still still.” Ranmaru orders, shifting to be just a bit closer to Tokiya. When Tokiya tries to turn his head to look at him, Ranmaru simply straightens his head to force Tokiya to look forward. Tokiya is _incredibly_ confused when Ranmaru begins to braid the strand of seaweed and shells into his hair. 

Tokiya doesn’t ask him until he’s gone, but before he can interrogate Ranmaru when he pulls back, he falls into a surprised silence because Ranmaru’s face is actually a bit red. 

“Ran? What is this?” Tokiya’s eyebrows furrow, his hand raising to brush his fingers over the end of the strand. 

“It’s somethin’ couples do.” Ranmaru mumbles. “‘T show the other one they’re serious.”

Tokiya’s face softens, and then he grins- a very bright, closed eye smile. He pulls Ranmaru closer by the arm, into a kiss that Ranmaru takes control of quickly, pulling Tokiya closer by the waist. 

“It’s sweet.” Tokiya says fondly when they’ve pulled away, his legs now over Ranmaru’s tail. “Thank you, Ran.”

“Would’a told you sooner.” Ranmaru says gruffly. “But I wanted it ‘t be a surprise, ‘n finding the right shells was hard.”

“There are right shells?”

“Part ‘a the tradition is ‘t find matching shells. So if I found one I liked I had ‘t search for one like it. …’N this isn’t part of it, but I wanted to find shells that’d look good on you.”

“Purple and blue, huh?” Tokiya smiles. “I do like purple.”

“It looks good on you.”

“You’re a good shell finder.” Tokiya’s voice is playful, but he can’t wipe the happy smile on his face. “A true talent.”

Ranmaru snorts, but seeing Tokiya’s smile gets a smile on Ranmaru’s face, too. 

That day, they just stay outside of Tokiya’s home, not moving to their rock, and it’s mostly because they had found a comfortable position and neither of them wanted to use it. 

Tokiya kept the braided seaweed for as long as he could, but it was only midway through the next day when it stopped holding. Tokiya unbraided it and set it on his desk, to think of a solution. 

When he goes back to Ranmaru, he’s wearing a a thin, green braided rope that he’s strung the shells through. Ranmaru eyes it and Tokiya gives an apologetic, sheepish smile. “I’m afraid the seaweed didn’t fare well after it dried. I know this isn’t exactly your tradition but-”

“It suits you.” Ranmaru assures. “‘N that’s gotta be more practical. It’s the shells that really matter, babe. The seaweed wasn’t hard ‘t find.”

Tokiya sighs, but he smiles. He didn’t think that Ranmaru would be _angry_ \- but he doesn’t understand many of Ranmaru’s traditions and he’d hate to accidentally disrespect him. Not that Tokiya had yet to, at least. He was glad about that.

They went back to the rock that day, and Tokiya winds up under Ranmaru after a makeout session that had started as nothing more than a short kiss. 

“I should-” Tokiya loses his train of thought for a few seconds as Ranmaru attacks a sensitive spot on Tokiya’s side with his lips, sending a shudder through Tokiya. “Should return the favor.”

“I’m not as sensitive.” Ranmaru mumbles. “Or reactive. ‘S not as fun.”

“Now you’re just messing with me.” Tokiya can’t help his groan when Ranmaru nibbles on his skin. 

This time around, Ranmaru focuses on a specific spot, and he pulls away to a small, light forming spot, and Tokiya just barely catches Ranmaru’s interested expression before Ranmaru is on another spot. 

Now that he knows he _can_ make marks on Tokiya, he does. By the time Tokiya is cuddled up to Ranmaru’s chest, his own is dotted with pale pink marks, and a few that are a bit more red when Tokiya had broken and finally admitted to Ranmaru that he could go a bit harder.

For the next few months, it stays like this. Tokiya’s necklace almost never leaves his neck- he’s even gotten compliments on it, and when he’s asked where he found the shells he always tells people that you can find anything if you try hard enough. 

Mermaids weren’t common knowledge, and for Ranmaru’s sake he was going to keep it that way. 

But then he gets an eviction notice. Tokiya had thought that he was paying enough, but clearly that wasn’t the case. 

He had missed his visit with Ranmaru that day. That day was spent in and out of panic attacks. 

Tokiya wasn’t sure what he was going to do. Tokiya didn’t have enough money to get anywhere near here, or _anywhere_. 

And Ranmaru. 

If Tokiya couldn’t even move to somewhere _close_ \- what would he do about Ranmaru?

Tokiya finds one of the two bottles Ranmaru had last given him, and he writes a final note. He had never imagined writing a goodbye letter.

_Ran._

_I love you with all of my heart. I’m sorry for giving you such a hard time for leaving me when I’m doing the same. I hope you can find something to keep you happy, but I have no choice but to leave. I really do love you._

_Perhaps in another life._

It was short, it wasn’t sweet, but Tokiya’s tears were falling onto the paper and blurring his vision. 

Tokiya puts the message in the bottle, and he ties his necklace tightly around the mouth of it, to make sure it doesn’t fall off. Tokiya almost wants to keep it, but if he were leaving Ranmaru, what right did he have?

Tokiya isn’t planning to stay after he threw the bottle. It was beginning to grow darker, so Ranmaru shouldn’t be expecting him. Tokiya should be able to get to his house before Ranmaru reads his note.

Tokiya winces when the bottle hits the water, but he immediately turns to go back in his house. 

Less than twenty minutes later, there’s a pounding on his door. His heart leaps into his chest, and he tries to ignore it, but it doesn’t stop. He finally peeks out of the peephole, but his heart _stops_ when he can’t see anything and the pounding continues. 

He slowly opens the door, and he stays in a quiet shock when Ranmaru _drags_ himself inside of Tokiya’s home. Ranmaru drags himself almost completely inside, only the long fins at the end of his tail remaining outside of the door. 

Tokiya has no choice but to hear him out. He can’t lift him, and he won’t hurt him. 

Tokiya doesn’t even know how Ranmaru _made it_ this far. One glance out the door shows the line Ranmaru made, dragging himself through the sand, and then his eyes fall to Ranamru, the bottle held tightly in one hand, the necklace in the other. 

Ranmaru is glaring at him. He leans to his side enough to throw the necklace at Tokiya’s chest, and Tokiya barely manages to catch it. 

“That’s not returnable.” Is the first thing Ranmaru says.

“Ranmaru! How on Earth-”

“Shut up.” Ranmaru’s tail slaps the ground angrily. “I’m not lettin’ you break up with me through a bottle.”

“You left me with noth-”

“I wasn’t right to.” Ranmaru cuts him off. “‘N we weren’t _dating_ Tokiya.”

“You can find someone else.” Tokiya says weakly. He’s surprised that he managed to get through the sentence, but Ranmaru is quick to talk when he was done. 

“We have life partners. ...If you wanna leave me because you want to leave me, I wouldn’t stop you Tokiya. I’m not tryin’ ‘t keep you in this relationship if it’s not where you wanna be. But you’re all I’m ever gonna have, so if you don’t _really_ wanna leave me, I’m not just gonna let you. Not unless you can look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t wanna be with me.” Ranmaru sets down the bottle to push himself as high as he can go. 

“Can we talk about this in the ocean?” Tokiya’s eyes are focused on the ground in front of him. 

“If you’re gonna tell me you don’t want this, tell me it here.”

“That’s not- ...that isn’t what I’m going to say.” Tokiya closes his eyes. “I know you can breathe air but-”

“I’ll be fine for a conversation. Talk to me.”

Tokiya sighs, sinking to his knees. Ranmaru at least settles on his elbows. “I’m being evicted. I’m not going to be able to live here anymore, and I don’t have enough money to live anywhere near here. I’m not going to be able to see you.”

“...D’ya have another place in line?”

“...No. I don’t.”

“I dunno that much about money. Do you have enough to go somewhere else?”

Tokiya’s silence is an answer. Ranmaru scowls. 

“C’mere.” Tokiya hesitantly gets closer. “Couple ‘a things. First.” Ranmaru reaches up to flick Tokiya’s forehead. “Can’t speak for you, but _I’d_ rather have a distanced relationship than lose you.” His voice is gruff, but Tokiya’s eyes widen at the sentiment. Ranmaru takes the necklace from Tokiya’s hand, and with the hand not supporting himself, he slips the necklace over Tokiya’s head. “Get on your bathing suit and follow me back.”

Ranmaru waits in the living, though Tokiya does convince him inside enough to close the door and then forces a bottle of water in his hands before he goes to get changed. Tokiya comes back out, but he has to still when Ranmaru speaks. 

“I love you, too, by the way.” He grunts. The bottle is completely gone, which does worry Tokiya, but Ranmaru just sets it on the table near him and begins to turn himself around. 

It isn’t until he’s stretching to reach the door handle that Tokiya breaks out of his reverie to go open it. “Isn’t there something I can do, Ran?”

“You can’t lift me. It’s fine. I got here, didn’t I?”

“It couldn’t have been easy.”

Tokiya thoroughly believes that. Even when Ranmaru starts pulling himself, making it look surprisingly effortless. But Tokiya can see the way his muscles strain, and the way his tail parts the sand as it drags.

Tokiya lets out a sigh that he didn’t know he was holding when Ranmaru reaches the water again. 

“Come on. We’re swimmin’ somewhere. I’m gonna flip on my stomach when we’re ‘bout waist deep, ‘n I want you ‘t climb on my back.”

“What?”

“It’s gonna be easier than tryin’ to swim and keep you over the water.”

“...Alright.” Tokiya’s eyebrows furrow. He follows Ranmaru about waist deep, and Ranmaru flips, hovering just over the ocean floor. Tonight was a calm night. When Tokiya straddles Ranmaru’s waist, Ranmaru’s hands hold tightly onto the outside of Tokiya’s thighs. Tokiya doesn’t think this would be comfortable, but he leans forward to hold onto Ranmaru’s shoulders and Ranmaru doesn’t seem to be having trouble moving. Tokiya can feel his body move as his tail does, but he keeps it slow. Tokiya knows for a fact that Ranmaru can throw faster but he must be trying to not knock Tokiya off. 

It takes some time, but they eventually make their way to a cove. The cove is warm. It wasn’t _chilly_ outside, but it’s like a summer evening inside of the alcove, and the water feels warmer, too. Ranmaru brings Tokiya in until Ranmaru’s stomach and Tokiya’s knees land on sand. There’s damp sand surrounding where the water laps at it, and a bit further in the cave there’s dry sand. It’s like the edge of the beach, only warmer and smaller. 

Cozy. 

Tokiya does get off of Ranmaru, to explore the small area. The cave must be about eight feet tall because Tokiya can stand straight and still have a bit of room. Ranmaru watches him, half out of the water and half in it, lying on his stomach. 

“It’s nice.” Tokiya says softly. “But I’m not sure why you brought me here.” 

Ranmaru lifts his head from where he had laid it on his arms. “This is my only solution.” Ranmaru says grimly. “Fer you ‘t live ‘ere.”

“Ran, I-” Tokiya’s eyebrows pull in. 

Ranmaru frowns. “It’s not good. I know. I can get y’food, ‘n clean water, ‘n bring you back if you need somethin’ else- ...it wouldn’t be easy. And I don’t know another way for you to stay.” Ranmaru swallows hard, and Tokiya sees his fingers dig into the ground. “We could hide some ‘a yer stuff. Maybe even in ‘ere where it’s dry. Clothes ‘n books ‘n whatever money you ‘ave. ...It’s not good. I know it isn’t. I want to help you, I just-” Ranmaru looks up, and his face is _helpless_. His tail slaps against the water. “How do I do it?”

“I guess I don’t get much social interaction anyways.” Tokiya’s voice is weak and his smile misses the mark. 

Ranmaru’s eyebrows furrow, his frown still in place. “I’d stay.” Ranmaru’s tail flicks upwards, this time splashing a bit of water on the part of himself on the dry sand. “I can sleep ‘ere. There’s enough water.”

“Wha- _really?_ ” Tokiya blinks, taken aback. 

Ranmaru grunts. 

Tokiya gets quiet for a few seconds. “How would we get any of my stuff here?”

“It’d take a few trips, but if you bring a bag, we could get a couple ‘a thing here.”

“...And the food?” 

“...Mostly fish. It’s all I can really catch.”

“I’d have to cook it.” Tokiya mumbles. “...I think they have smaller things used for camping- but I don’t know how I’d bring it. Fire wouldn’t be safe.”

“I can carry a decent amount, Toki. ‘N somethin’ small ‘n contained would be fine.” 

Tokiya looks around the cave again, but then his eyes narrow on a dry corner, mostly obscured in shadow, and then he begins to head over. 

“Toki-” Tokiya hears the water move, but it’s too late, because Tokiya has seen the edge of a very old, curled up piece of paper and he’s grabbed it, unrolling it carefully. 

_I wish for a friend._

Tokiya becomes speechless. 

“You… you kept them?” 

“...I just had a feelin’.” Ranmaru mutters. “That you were gonna be important ‘t me.”

Tokiya is quiet for a long moment. He can’t help the tears that are forming in his eyes or falling down his cheeks, and he can’t help the way his voice cracks when he talks. “I’ll stay here. I’ll stay with you.”

They figure it out. 

It isn’t easy, but Tokiya finds a small portable camping stove and he goes for one medium-sized water bottle before Ranmaru sends him back to get one a bit larger. He brings a few books, and a few outfits- and he scouts out the public beach, because there’s a bathroom and a shower. He only brings one backpack with the clothes and books and the money he has- and he does end up bringing a towel, a blanket and a pillow- and only as an after thought after he and Ranmaru discuss sleeping. 

For some time, it works. 

Ranmaru brings him fish, and Tokiya eats them with a thanks, but it’s very clear that he doesn’t enjoy them. 

“C’mere, Toki, will ya?” Ranmaru asks one day. “I wanna bring you somewhere.”

Tokiya’s eyebrows furrow, but he climbs on Ranmaru’s back. He’d grown accustomed at this point. They don’t head towards the land near Tokiya’s house- rather, they head towards a direction Tokiya had never gone in. 

“‘S a pretty small island, but don’t wander too far from the edge. But I saw some berries, not too far in. If you grab me one I can check ‘n see if they’re poisonous.”

“Ranmaru!” 

Ranmaru snorts. “This ain’t some suicide mission, Toki. Lots ‘a fish ‘r poisonous, ‘n my body doesn’t develop it the same. Might get a little stomach ache if it’s bad, but that’s not as bad as what you’d get.”

Tokiya sighs. “If you die, I’ll be extremely angry.”

That one does get a laugh from Ranmaru as he squeezes Tokiya’s thighs and then releases him. “Yeah, yeah. Go bring me a berry.”

Tokiya gets off of Ranmaru, and he does. Ranmaru tries one, making a bit of a face when he does. Tokiya’s expression is immediately worried, but Ranmaru waves him off. “Relax. ‘S just the reaction I have ‘t different foods.” Ranmaru nose scrunches up. “Just tastes gross. Like you ‘n fish. But they’re fine.”

“They’re fine?” Tokiya confirms, watching Ranmaru’s face closely. He can’t deny that he’d like to eat some- he’d like to eat anything that isn’t fish. 

“They’re all good, Toki. You can eat ‘em.”

Tokiya almost does backtrack immediately, but then he slows, just a bit. “Why were you searching for berries?”

“Because you make faces while ya eat the fish. Dunno if those’ll actually tide ya over, but at least it’s somethin’ else, yeah?”

Tokiya sighs, but his expression softens, and he smiles. “Thanks, Ran.”

And that’s how it is for some time. Tokiya lives off of fish and berries in the small cave. He’s spoken about almost anything he can think of with Ranmaru and finds their conversations often delving into already discussed areas, and he’s read every book twice to himself and once out loud to Ranmaru. 

After a while, the only part that’s still nice is sleeping, which Tokiya does a lot of. Because the cave is so warm, Tokiya sleeps on top of the blanket, and he lays it on the damp sand so that the water won’t reach him but Ranmaru can still keep his tail in it, and Ranmaru lays his head on Tokiya’s stomach and that’s how they sleep. The closest Tokiya thinks they’ll ever get, sleeping wise. 

But then there’s a day where Ranmaru is too quiet. Tokiya had slept most of the day and had rejected dinner for the third day in a row. 

“...I think we’re down ‘t two options, Toki.” Ranmaru says quietly. Tokiya’s back is to him, as he sleeps on his side, but Ranmaru is facing away, too, to look at the water. “You’re dyin’ here.”

“What do you mean?” Tokiya asks softly. His voice was always soft. 

“You’re not gettin’ enough here. You can’t live off of fish ‘n fruit. We aren’t the same. ...I’ve either gotta bring you back, or-”

“Or?” Tokiya finally forces himself to sit. 

Ranmaru sighs, hanging his head. “Turn you.”

“Turn… me? Like a vampire?”

Ranmaru finally turns around, but his face is serious. “There’s only way ‘t become like me if you’re not born that way, ‘n that’s ‘t be killed by my kind.”

“Ran, you weren’t-”

“I’m natural.” The reassurance is still grim. “But it’s one ‘r the other. I’m guaranteeing that you die a real slow death, ‘n you’re already fuckin’ miserable.”

“...I don’t want to leave you.” Tokiya says quietly. 

“...I’m gonna have ‘t kill you, Toki.” Ranmaru’s voice is pained. “I’m gonna have to drown you.”

“I know.” Tokiya says, though he can’t help the way his voice shakes.

“If that’s really your choice.” Ranmaru’s voice has softened, and it almost makes Tokiya wince. “You’re gonna want ‘t take your shorts off. You don’t want your tail to form around them.”

Tokiya nods, but at first he makes no moves. His voice is weak, and almost a little sheepish. He gives a dry laugh. “Can I ask you for something? Before we do this?”

“Anythin’.”

“After… After I take my shorts off, but before we do this… will you kiss me?” 

What he directly said wasn’t actually what he meant, but he could tell in Ranmaru’s eyes that Ranmaru understood. “I’ll take my time.” He promises.

Tokiya is slow in undressing from his shorts, but Ranmaru is on him when he does, pushing Tokiya into the blanket. 

Ranmaru starts at his neck. He already knows Tokiya’s most sensitive spots like the back of his hand, but he takes the route he had taken the first time- kissing all of Tokiya’s skin, but paying special attention to areas he knows Tokiya is weak to.

The real exploration happens when Ranmaru hits Tokiya’s waist. This is the first time Ranmaru does actually lean back to really examine Tokiya, and Tokiya’s thankful that Ranmaru had waited because there was less nervousness when Ranmaru had already spent so much time on him. 

That didn’t mean that there wasn’t any. 

Being completely naked in front of Ranmaru was absolutely terrifying. 

“I’ve never seen a human naked.” Ranmaru admits. “Think it’d be weird, normally.” Ranmaru presses a kiss to the closest area of skin he’s near- the side of Tokiya’s knee. “Doesn’t feel like it now.” Ranmaru gets a teasing smile on his face. For the moment, both men are able to forget the looming decision about to happen. “I think you’re real fuckin’ hot. Pants on ‘r off.”

That gets Tokiya, and it makes him laugh, throwing his head back, and when Tokiya really gets laughing, so does Ranmaru, their laughs echoing in the cave. “Classic.” Tokiya jokes. 

“Can never go wrong with ‘im.” 

“How are you so well versed in human lingo?” Tokiya mumbles. Maybe now wasn’t the time to be curious about it- but he was. 

“Listen ‘t people sometimes, ‘n people watch. ‘N there are people like me that are obsessed with actin’ ‘n watchin’ humans. I pick things up.” 

Normally Ranmaru won’t talk to him during this- claiming that there are better things for Ranmaru’s mouth to be doing. But today Ranmaru is patient. 

“Ran-” Tokiya’s voice becomes nervous. Uncertain. Ranmaru’s hand slides down the outside of Tokiya’s thigh, and Ranmaru interrupts him. 

“If it’s about after this, we’ll talk about it after, alright? Even if you change your mind. I wanna focus on you right now, alright? No bad thoughts. Not yet.”

Ranmaru accentuates his statement with a kiss to Tokiya’s pelvis that gets Tokiya’s heart beating for a very different reason. “Okay.” Tokiya’s voice is breathless. 

Ranmaru is slower with Tokiya’s legs than he had been with Tokiya’s chest. Tokiya had quite a few markings now, mostly on his sides, though Ranmaru makes a few more on the inside of Tokiya’s thigh, these ones far more gentle, noticing how much more sensitive this area was. 

Tokiya can only guess why Ranmaru’s being this attentive. This patient. A few reasons come to mind but he pushes them down. 

No bad thoughts. 

When Ranmaru makes his way back up to Tokiya’s hips, his voice is a mumble. “Tell me what to do.”

Where Ranmaru’s fingers move, sliding up his thigh and just between the center of his legs- to the place he wasn’t unaffected in, (how could he be unaffected, with the way Ranmaru was handling him?) Tokiya understands what he’s asking. 

“Are you sure?” Tokiya’s voice is almost a whisper, and it’s shaking but not in a bad way. 

Ranmaru presses another kiss to Tokiya’s pelvis, closer. “If you’ll let me.” 

Tokiya tells him. He shows him. Tokiya shows Ranmaru exactly how to get Tokiya undone, shaking and moaning and whining with no reserve, unraveling until he can’t even speak enough to tell Ranmaru how to continue but Ranmaru’s figured it out now and he doesn’t need instruction. 

Tokiya cries as he finally, fully comes undone. Ranmaru’s hand is washed in the sea before he pulls himself up, worried, but Tokiya laughs. 

“It’s good. You’re good. Not bad tears.” Tokiya assures breathlessly. “Lay with me? Please?”

Ranmaru does, tail and fins and body and arms all wrapped around Tokiya, and Tokiya goes so easily. 

It’s dark, before either of them even speak.

“Is this what you want, Ran? Is this the decision you’re hoping I’ll choose?”

“...I want you.” Ranmaru says finally. “I want you for the rest of my life. I want you to be my life partner ‘n I don’t want ‘t lose you. But I don’t want you ‘t die. I don’t want ‘t hurt you, ‘r kill you. I want you with me but I don’t want you dead. Both are true at the same time.”

“But my options are worse now than they were before.” Tokiya sighs. “I feel I may be facing death either way. But to die to be with you- faced with dying, alone in the streets… that isn’t even a choice.” Tokiya sighs, to press his forehead to Ranmaru’s chest. “I’m ready.”

“You’ll be coming back.” Ranmaru’s voice breaks. “It’s not permanent.” Tokiya doesn’t know if it’s for Tokiya, or if it’s for himself.

“I know.” Tokiya says softly. “I know.”

Tokiya sits up, and Ranmaru brings himself up with Tokiya, still holding onto him. Ranmaru turns Tokiya’s head, to gently press a kiss to his lips and then to press his forehead against Tokiya’s.

Tokiya is no longer the reason they’re waiting. 

“It’s going to hurt.” Ranmaru says quietly. A warning, but Tokiya can hear something like pain in his voice. “I wish I could change that.”

“Drowning isn’t the slowest way to go.” Tokiya mumbles. 

Now isn’t the time to tell Ranmaru that it’s one of the ways he hoped he never would. 

Ranmaru slowly moves closer to the sea, Tokiya still wrapped firmly in his arms. “You may be ending my life-” Tokiya frees his hand, to run his thumb across Ranmaru’s cheekbone. “But really, you’re saving it. If I’m to come back, are you really killing me?”

“I’m hurtin’ you. ‘N that’s not easy ‘t convince myself is alright.”

Tokiya gives him a soft smile, trying to hide his own fear. “Life partners, right? After this, it really will be true.”

Ranmaru sighs. “Life partners.” 

With that, they’re in the sea. 

Ranmaru’s voice is grim. “Let out all the air you can now. No point in makin’ this any longer than it needs ‘t be.”

Tokiya blows out what he can. Ranmaru’s hands are around Tokiya’s waist. When Tokiya is out of air, Ranmaru goes under. 

Tokiya had already felt uncomfortably breathless, but now it was beginning to hurt already. Ranmaru’s tail wraps around Tokiya’s legs, keeping them together. Tokiya opens his eyes. What did it matter if his eyes burned when his chest already did? 

Ranmaru is a different sight underwater, this close to Tokiya. 

Tokiya’s eyes close, when Ranmaru presses his lips to Tokiya’s. Ranmaru parts his lips with his tongue, but then Tokiya feels Ranmaru breathe in. Whatever little air Tokiya had remaining is gone. 

Tokiya tries not to struggle, but when his body truly registers that he’s about to die, he can’t help it. Ranmaru’s arms and tail are a vice, not letting him escape. Ranmaru’s head moves forward, onto Tokiya’s shoulder, only pinning him further to Ranmaru’s body. 

Slowly, cold starts to take over. It’s scary, compared to the heat in his chest. 

Tokiya isn’t sure how long it takes, before he finally loses consciousness, but it’s bliss when he does. 

He wakes up, gasping for air- before he realizes that isn’t what he’s breathing in. Ranmaru has set him at the bottom of the ocean, but he is filtering something to let him breathe despite it. Ranmaru’s tail is curled under him, and he’s watching Tokiya. 

When Tokiya reaches for him, Ranmaru is too hesitant. It makes Tokiya frown, but Ranmaru does come. Tokiya wraps his arms tightly around Ranmaru. 

Tokiya can’t tell fully what he looks like- but the first thing he really notices are the scales. They’re a bluish-purple color, iridescent from the sun hitting the waves far above them. He wraps his arms around Ranmaru when he’s close enough. 

_Are you okay?_

Tokiya jerks back, not letting go of Ranmaru, but confused. Ranmaru smiles dryly, and then nods upwards. Tokiya is confused, so Ranmaru just reaches down and scoops Tokiya up bridal style. Tokiya finally gets a look at his legs, or lack thereof. They’re different. Tokiya has the long fins at the end of his nearly translucent tail, the same bluish-purple his scales seem to be. But he only has smaller fins along the length of it, rather than the ribbons that Ranmaru does- and even the fins at the end of his tail seem smaller than Ranmaru’s. Ranmaru carries him easily to the surface. 

Tokiya is afraid to breathe- but he can. It feels different, than breathing underwater, but he’s not out of breath in the slightest. Ranmaru sits at the furthest end of the cove, keeping Tokiya mostly in the water. 

“What was that?” Tokiya expects his voice to be hoarse, but it isn’t. 

“We can’t talk under water, Toki.” Ranmaru sighs. “Sorta like a mix ‘a echolocation ‘n… I dunno. Supernatural shit? If you try ‘t talk yer only gonna get bubbles.” 

“Then how did-?”

“It’s hard ‘t explain. You can practice when we’re back under.” Ranmaru’s arms tighten on Tokiya. “But just look at me ‘n think about what you wanna say ‘t me. You’ll know if I hear it.”

Tokiya sighs, closing his eyes. 

It takes him a moment, but he smiles. “You know, Ran. I think you ruined my wishes. Pretty sure the ocean was supposed to wash them away.”

Ranmaru scoffs, but it’s playful and it makes the building pressure of worry in Tokiya’s chest lighten. “Ruined ‘em? Pretty sure I _granted_ ‘em, Toki.”


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This wasn't originally going to have a sequel but by popular demand from a friend- (thanks mimi) now it does. 
> 
> warnings for this chapter are male pregnancy (kind of? theyre fish) and a lot of mostly non descriptive sexual scenes

Tokiya and Ranmaru stayed together, sitting in the shallow water of the cove for a very long time. Tokiya had spent a lot of it, flicking his tail up, occasionally splashing both of them with water. Ranmaru doesn’t seem to mind.

“It’s startin’ to get dark. We can sleep on land, but it’s gonna be easier ‘t sleep underwater.”

Tokiya glances further in the cover, almost a bit nervous. Ranmaru sighs. 

“If you’re really that nervous, babe, I guess tonight wouldn’t hurt. But we need ‘t sleep closer to the water.”

“...Alright.”

Tokiya insists on dragging the pillow to the lip of the water, despite the fact that it’s getting wet, but he insists that he and Ranmaru share it. They sleep facing each other, their noses nearly brushing and their shoulders in the water. The way the soft sand gives underneath them makes cuddling easier.

“Here’s somethin’ I haven’t done since I was a kid.” Ranmaru mumbles. Tokiya feels Ranmaru’s tail wind tightly against his own. “When you’re more used ‘t your tail, there’s a way you can wind yers back against mine. Last time I did this was with my mom, back when I was little enough that I’d get lost if I drifted away. ‘Fore I learned how ‘t anchor myself on other stuff. Couples do it a lot, too. ‘S a lot warmer, anchoring yerself to someone else instead of a rock. Lot more comfortable, too.” Ranmaru tightens his arms around Tokiya, to hammer in his point. “‘N from a survival instinct, too. Lots a things stay away from anythin’ bigger ‘n they are ‘n we aren’t exactly subtle. But together we’re at least bigger.”

“It’s interesting.” Tokiya’s voice is a mumble but the sentiment is genuine. “But I like it. I don’t think I’ve ever really gotten to cuddle with you.”

“‘S hard when you can’t stay in the water ‘n I can’t stay on land.”

“Is there anything else about mermaids I should know?”

“Lots.” Ranmaru grunts in affirmation. “But I’ll tell ya as we go.” Ranmaru presses a kiss to Tokiya’s forehead. “There’s one thing though, I ‘aven’t told you. I’m not immortal, but I live a hell of a lot longer ‘n humans do.”

“It seemed like you aged with me, though.” Tokiya’s eyebrows furrowed. 

“To some sort of extent. Our childhood is a lot similar to yers, but I’m gonna be like this for a long time. Longer ‘n you would’ve been.”

“Is… Is my lifespan going to be different? Because I’m not natural?”

“It won’t. ‘T my understandin’, your life’s linked with mine. Unless you’re killed, you should live as long as I do, since I changed you.”

“Thank God.” Tokiya sighs. 

Ranmaru clicks his tongue. “Don’t sound so happy about that.”

“It’s nothing bad.” Tokiya muses. “If you live longer than I do- I’m still getting more life than I should. ...But it’s been an… unspoken fear of mine, far before I was serious with you. To imagine growing old with someone, to lose them? To be missing part of yourself because they left before you had. And if I’m to live as long as you, you shouldn’t need to experience it, either. ...I’d… I’d like to say that you aren’t the only reason I’m living- because I know that a partner shouldn’t be your _entire_ life but… well, you are.”

“We’ll change that.” Ranmaru mumbles. “I’m not gonna leave you- but trust me. You’re not gonna need ‘t worry about money, ‘r resources, or any ‘a that shit anymore. Every life has its issues, but it’s… pretty damn good in the ocean.” Ranmaru finally grins. “I’ve got a lotta places I wanna show you. I’m real excited ‘t finally be on the same plane as you. If I had ‘t work with you livin’ on land fer the rest ‘a your life, I would’ve. But that’s not our barrier anymore.”

“And I’m very glad about that.”

“I hope you like travelin’, Toki. We’re gonna be doin’ a lot of it.”

“I’ve meant to ask you this some time ago- but don’t you have a… community?”

“Sure I do. But I’m always gonna be able ‘t go back. We’re a pretty independent species. So if you’re worried that I’m gonna be kicked out- ya don’t need ‘t be.”

“That is a relief.” Tokiya admits. “I know what it’s like… to feel like you have no one. You’ve really been the only exception. Even my mother…” Tokiya flinches. Ranmaru’s hand rubs Tokiya’s bare back.

“I’ll eventually take you around ‘t see the people around ‘ere.”

“Will they accept me?”

“You’re not the only one that’s been turned.” Ranmaru reassures. “They’ll take to you. After all- you’re one of us now.”

“One of you.” Tokiya mumbles. He finally sighs and closes his eyes. 

“Get some rest.” Ranmaru shifts, to more comfortably hold Tokiya. “We’re probably gonna have a long day tomorrow.”

Tokiya presses his nose to the center of Ranmaru’s chest, and he uses Ranmaru’s breathing as something to match his own to, and it helps him fall asleep. 

The next day it takes a good half an hour for Ranmaru to get Tokiya into the water. Tokiya sits on the sand, his tail bent and pulled up to his chest. Ranmaru is at the mouth of the cave, holding his arms out. 

“C’mon, Toki. I’ve got you.”

“The undertow.” Tokiya ducks his head. “What if I get pulled away?”

“I won’t let you. I’m gonna be right by you, the whole time.”

“We’ll lose the cove.” 

“We can’t stay ‘ere anyways, Toki. You’re gonna feel better sleepin’ underwater, anyways.”

“...I’m scared.”

Ranmaru’s eyebrows draw in and he finally moves closer. He lays on his stomach in front of Tokiya, propping himself up on his arms. “You’re gonna be fine. I wouldn’t lie ‘t you about this.”

Tokiya buries his face in his tail. Ranmaru sighs and Tokiya hears the water shift as Ranmaru moves. When Tokiya looks up, Ranmaru is gone. 

“Ran?” Tokiya lets his tail drop, his eyes skimming the water to try to find him, but he can’t. Tokiya turns, to crawl towards the edge of the cove, and then two hands reach out of the water and pull him into it. Tokiya’s eyes shoot open, but before he can struggle, he makes out Ranmaru’s face. 

His eyes don’t burn in the water- there isn’t even a transition to it. Tokiya’s sight is as clear as it was when he had been pulled under. 

Tokiya focuses on Ranmaru’s eyes. When he focuses on his thought, there’s a strange feeling. It was almost like something clicked. 

_You tricked me._

Ranmaru winces, his expression a bit apologetic. 

_You weren’t gonna come in._

Ranmaru carefully lets go of Tokiya, and it’s all Tokiya can do to reach out, to cling to Ranmaru. He feels Ranmaru’s eyes on the side of his head. 

_You can’t just stick ‘t me. It’s gonna be alright, Toki._

Tokiya has to manage to look at Ranmaru, but the back of his head seems to work because he gets the same click.

_I want to go back up. I don’t like this._

_Ya just need ‘t get used to it._

_I don’t want to._

Ranmaru’s shoulders drop. Tokiya can’t hear anything, but it reminds him of a sigh.

Tokiya wasn’t very fond of speaking through thoughts. When Ranmaru ‘spoke’ it still sounded like him. The deep tone was incredibly different than Tokiya’s normal thoughts. It almost felt like if Tokiya were trying to recall Ranmaru’s voice in his mind, and it just felt strange.

Tokiya looks at Ranmaru, almost curiously. Experimentally, he wonders how much control he has over this. After the thought, he doesn’t feel a click. 

At least Ranmaru wouldn’t hear _all_ of his thoughts. That was nice.

Ranmaru lowers them, so that they’re closer to the floor of the ocean. 

_Just try. It won’t get better if ya don’t._

Ranmaru moves back, but he’s too fast. Tokiya tries to reach for him but his fingertips only brush Ranmaru’s shoulder. 

Tokiya sinks. His tail writhes, but it only serves to speed up his path straight downwards until he’s on his stomach, his tail slapping at the sand but not lifting him. 

He glares up at Ranmaru. 

_You’re playing dirty._

_But now I know you can’t swim._

Ranmaru frowns, but he finally gets closer to Tokiya, to lift him back up. 

_You knew that._

_Some guppies hatch knowin’ how to swim. I was hopin’ it’d be the same._

Tokiya freezes, any comebacks lost- and then he can’t help but grin. 

_What?_

Ranmaru’s eyes narrow. 

Tokiya’s smile only brightens. 

_Guppy? That’s cute._

Ranmaru as a guppy was a thought alone that made Tokiya smile. He tries to picture a baby… a _guppy_ Ranmaru, even younger than when he had met Ranmaru, and his tail swishes happily. 

_Shut up._

There’s no bite to it. Ranmaru does seem to turn a bit more serious. 

_Why’re you so afraid of the water? It’s not the same, Toki. You **can’t** drown._

Tokiya’s tail droops, glancing away from Ranmaru. It’s unfortunate that he has to look back. Another drawback to underwater communication. 

_You’re the only good experience I’ve had with the water, and most of our interactions were on land._

A grimace crosses Tokiya’s face before he continues. 

_...I’m worried it might stay that way. Even if we’re both in water, how much can we really do?_

Ranmaru watches him closely, but now that Tokiya’s done talking, he looks away from Ranmaru. 

_What ‘r you talkin’ about? What don’t you think we can do?_

Tokiya goes red, but Ranmaru turns Tokiya’s head towards him. 

_Aren’t… more **intimate** things harder under water?_

Ranmaru’s eyebrow raises, but then he grins. A wild, wolfish, predatory grin, and then he rushes in towards Tokiya. 

Ranmaru’s lips meet Tokiya’s, and he quickly but progressively deepens the kiss until he’s nipping at Tokiya’s lip until Tokiya’s lips part. The water filling his mouth isn’t strange- Tokiya thinks there may have already _been_ water in his mouth but it’s so hard to tell. Ranmaru’s tongue feels around Tokiya’s mouth. 

The kiss goes on for absurdly long, but Ranmaru eventually, slowly pulls back. Tokiya’s eyes are wide, but he isn’t out of breath in the slightest. 

_How?_

Tokiya can’t think to form any more words than that. 

Ranmaru’s grin is still there. His fingers run gently just under Tokiya’s jaw, on his neck, and it feels strange. When Tokiya’s look is still confused, Ranmaru brings one Tokiya’s hands to the same spot on Ranmaru’s neck. 

_Gils, Toki. They close on land, ‘n they’re real small. It’s how we can breath on land and in water._

_Oh._

Tokiya swears that, even in Tokiya’s mind, Ranmaru sounds _smug_. 

_Kissin’ underwater’s way better than on land. Breathin’ is overrated anyway._

Tokiya’s laugh is silent as he lets his head fall against Ranmaru’s shoulder. Ranmaru gives him a minute. 

_But now- I need ‘t teach you to swim. It’s gonna suck a lot less when you figure it out._

Tokiya pulls back so that he can speak to Ranmaru. 

_Another thing I’ve been wondering is why you never did try to teach me to swim, back when I was human._

Ranmaru’s tail flicks, just enough for Tokiya to see. 

_I dunno how you’re supposed ‘t move your legs, ‘n it was too risky. If I hold you underwater now, you’ll be fine. ‘Sides. I watched you when you were near the water. Nothin’ was gonna happen. But I can’t carry you around fer the rest of your life. That’s not gonna be fun for you._

Tokiya gives a silent sigh. 

_I guess._

_I’ve said this a million times, babe, but it’s gonna be fine._

Tokiya just frowns. 

Ranmaru lets go of Tokiya, and Tokiya tries to hold on, but Ranmaru is quicker than Tokiya and he manages to get to Tokiya’s side, to set one hand on Tokiya’s stomach, his other on Tokiya’s lower back. 

_I’m turnin’ you. Let me._

Tokiya does, and Ranmaru gets Tokiya on his stomach, parallel to the ground. 

_You don’t need yer arms. Your tail’s a hell of a lot more powerful than your arms are, so movin’ ‘em won’t really affect anythin’. Your tail can bend-_

Midthought, the hand on Tokiya’s back leaves, pressing against where Tokiya’s knees should be, and with a bit of effort, Tokiya manages to bend it. Ranmaru’s hand stretches to touch Tokiya’s fins as he continues, to move those, too. 

_’N yer fins can go about any direction. That one’s gonna take some time ‘t learn, it just helps quick turns, fightin’ undertow ‘n followin’ it, too. When you move yer tail, ya don’t wanna move from your hips, move from the middle ‘a yer tail. Ya just wanna go up and down. If you’re tryin’ ‘t move fast-_

Ranmaru helps raise Tokiya’s tail from the knees, only about halfway up. He pushes down on his tail and Tokiya moves, though he ends up jerking forward an inch and Ranmaru gives a silent laugh, catching him. 

_Don’t go all ‘a the way up. But if you’re just tryin’ to move slow, go real slow up ‘n real slow down. The more you move, the faster you go. You’re real slow ‘t sink, so just don’t struggle and you’ll have plenty ‘a time ‘t fix yourself. ‘N you’ll learn to just move yer bottom fins. It’ll keep you in one place when you do. But fer now, don’t worry about the fins. Just focus on propelling yerself. ‘Til you get better, I’ll help you stay up._

Tokiya glances back. 

_You’re a surprisingly thorough teacher._

_Just goin’ from experience. ‘N I used ‘t help some ‘a the guppies learn ‘t swim. They’re real fuckin’ cute, too._

Ranmaru’s grin turns shit-eating.

_A lot like you._

_Shut up._

Tokiya’s thought holds _less_ bite than Ranmaru’s had earlier, and he knows his cheeks are burning, just a bit. 

_Yeah, yeah. Just go ahead ‘n try ‘t swim._

Tokiya gives another silent sigh, but he doesn’t feel like that conveys enough, so instead he sticks his tongue out at Ranmaru and he feels comfortable settling for that. He has to turn his head away because now Ranmaru _really_ looks amused. 

Tokiya tries to focus, bending his tail in the middle and lowering it back down. He pushes it down not far enough and he jerks, heading towards the ground. Ranmaru is next to him, on his back, but he doesn’t catch Tokiya. Tokiya tries again, trying to push further down. He pushes as far as he comfortably can and he jerks upwards, away from the ground. Ranmaru smiles at him. Tokiya has put enough distance between himself and the floor that Ranmaru can slide underneath him, facing Tokiya. 

_How on Earth do you swim without looking at where you’re going?_

Tokiya hopes that the exasperation shows through in his voice. He’s yet to move his tail again. 

_Watch._

Ranmaru grins smugly, and he shoots forward. Tokiya’s eyes widen as he heads towards a large rock on the bottom of the floor, but at the very last second he manages to avoid it, to make his way back around to be beneath Tokiya again. 

_All that did was give me a heart attack._

Tokiya’s thought is scolding. Ranmaru gives a silent laugh. 

_’Member my echolocation comment? When you get close enough ‘t somethin’ you just **feel** it. Takes some time ‘t get used to. Close your eyes._

Tokiya is hesitant, but he does. Only a second later, Tokiya feels a strange twist in his stomach and his eyes fly open. His eyes meet Ranmaru’s, less than an inch away from his face. A few seconds later, Ranmaru’s hands land on Tokiya’s hips. 

_See? ‘N you’ll learn how ‘t use it._

Ranmaru’s lips meet the tip of Tokiya’s nose, and then he drops under Tokiya. 

_Keep goin’._

Tokiya lets out a quiet sigh, but he focuses. He lifts his tail high, and when he lowers it, he shoots for somewhere in the middle of his last two strokes. It’s still jerky and he doesn’t stay perfectly straight, but he moves forward. It isn’t very fast, but that was Tokiya’s point and he’s glad. After a few more slower strokes, not smooth but getting straighter, Ranmaru nods. 

_Try turnin’._

Tokiya’s heart beats just a bit faster, but he stops moving his tail. He tries to turn his tail, and that’s a bit easier, but when he moves it, he flips over. His arms flail, on habit, to try to right himself, but Ranmaru’s arms wrap around his waist and rub his stomach, trying to calm him. 

_Yer alright. Stay still. I’ve got you._

Tokiya slows when Ranmaru is supporting him. 

_This is a good lesson._

Ranmaru reassures. 

_Do the same thing to turn around. Bend yer tail and move it._

Ranmaru lets him go, which does get Tokiya’s heart beating faster again, but he closes his eyes and tries to repeat his actions. He does manage, but it’s just as startling as it was the first time. 

He looks at Ranmaru, but before he can even form his own thoughts, they leave his mind completely because the smile Ranmaru shoots him is _proud_ and leaves Tokiya wordless. 

_Good._

Tokiya considers reaching out to Ranmaru, but he changes his mind just before he does. He lifts his tail and when he brings it down, he stops it short and goes face first into Ranmaru’s chest. Ranmaru catches him, turning them around. Tokiya can feel him shake with his soundless laugh but Ranmaru’s holding onto him tightly. 

_Yer doin’ great._

Ranmaru kisses the top of Tokiya’s head, but he holds onto him for a long moment. 

Tokiya tilts his head, resting his chin on Ranmaru’s chest. 

_You make it look easy._

_Trust me._

Ranmaru grins widely. 

_If you gave me legs I’d eat shit._

It’s Tokiya’s turn to laugh, and he flashes Tokiya a teasing smile.

_I’d help you learn._

Tokiya assures. 

_’N I’m sure you’d be a great teacher._

Ranmaru gives Tokiya a long moment of just laying on top of Ranmaru, and Tokiya can tell he’s using his fins to keep them steady because he can just barely feel Ranmaru’s fins moving beneath his own. 

_Alright. I’m gonna teach ya how ‘t turn ‘n then I’ll give you a break._

Tokiya begrudgingly lets go of Ranmaru, and Ranmaru returns to hovering beneath him. 

_Here’s what yer gonna do. You’ve gotta turn while yer movin’ or you’re gonna flip over._

Tokiya lets out a silent sigh, but he slowly moves his tail up, and this time he’s at least a bit less jerky, though it’s not much better. As he moves forward, he bends his tail. He turns too far, and he shoots ahead, moving his tail so quickly that it actually takes Ranmaru a second to follow his path, though he catches up easily. Ranmaru nods at him, and Tokiya almost hesitantly moves his tail again to propel him, but this time when he turns, it’s slower, and Ranmaru doesn’t lose pace with him. 

And then, testingly, he tries to move his bottom fins as he turns for a third time, and he _spirals_. Ranmaru manages to catch him, clearly trying to hide his amused expression. 

_It takes practice. Y’moved your fins too hard. They’re way more powerful than you’d think they are._

_I think I’m dizzy._

Tokiya is blinking, trying to reorient himself. He has no idea what direction he’s even turned because Ranmaru’s face is directly in front of his and his head is spinning too fast to try to focus on anything but Ranmaru. 

_Y’did good._

Ranmaru’s hand runs over Tokiya’s back. 

_If you wanna be done for today, it’s fine._

_Please._

Tokiya thinks his sigh can almost be heard through his thought. 

Ranmaru’s growing smirk gets Tokiya’s heart beating faster.

_Let’s find a good spot ‘n I’ll reward you fer doin’ a good job._

Reward? 

It’s such a fast thought that it doesn’t translate to Ranmaru, but Ranmaru can read his face. No answer comes. Ranmaru flips them, and Tokiya realizes that he had been facing the ocean floor, because now he can see the top of the water. Tokiya just holds on to Ranmaru’s neck, letting him lead Tokiya wherever he was going to.

Tokiya is surprised to find himself back at the cove. 

“Ran?”

“Underwater’s real nice, but one of the things ya can’t get down there is noise.”

“Oh?” 

Ranmaru grins, lifting himself over Tokiya to kiss his forehead. “But first. Yer gonna get a hang of swimmin’ in no time flat, Toki.”

“I made mistakes.” Tokiya winces.

“Wouldn’t call ‘em mistakes. You’d need ‘t learn how to do stuff like turnin’ eventually. You just figured it out yerself. But now.” Ranmaru’s grin is wide. “I’ve got somethin’ else ‘t show you. No work or stressin’ on yer part.”

“I thought you said that your chest wasn’t very sensitive.” Tokiya’s eyes narrow. “If it’s the same for us, shouldn’t _I_ finally be returning the favor?”

“‘S not what I’m doin’.” Ranmaru’s hand starts on Tokiya’s waist, but goes down to his hip. “Yer chest is might be a 'lil less more sensitive, but your _tail_ -” 

Ranmaru’s fingers find a spot that should have been the back of Tokiya’s thigh, but it’s softer and his fingers sink easily into the scales and Tokiya yelps. It’s a surprised sound, but it feels _good_ and Ranmaru can tell. 

“Some spots that ‘r harder ‘t reach are softer.” Ranmaru’s mouth presses to the top of Tokiya’s tail. Ranmaru’s own tail twitches, amused, and his grin is almost devilish. “Don’t forget that we can have kids, too, Toki. ‘Course you’re gonna have some sensitive spots.”

“We?” Tokiya can’t get a full sentence out when Ranmaru’s hand trails down the back of Tokiya’s tail and Tokiya has a full body shudder.

“You really wanna get into mermaid sex right now, Toki?”

“After.” Tokiya breathes out. “Can’t really focus when you’re doing that.”

Ranmaru’s fingers have dug into another sensitive spot. 

“If- if your tail is sensitive, why did you always focus on me?”

That’s hard in itself to get out, because Tokiya is still squirming. “I’ll let you once you figure yerself out. There are spots that ‘r really unpleasant ‘t touch, ‘n there ‘r spots-” Ranmaru’s hand trails to the front of Tokiya’s tail and presses in a spot that gets a whine out of his mouth that’s so high it almost hurts his throat. “That feel _too_ good.” Ranmaru gives Tokiya a few seconds of reprieve while his back lowers to the sand again. “I’ll let you touch me when you’ve figured out what spots ‘r good. ‘S nothin’ against you, either. Definitely don’t expect you ‘t know what spots don’t feel good yet.”

Tokiya goes bright red, but he takes in a breath, sitting up just enough to make eye contact with Ranmaru. “Then teach me.”

Ranmaru groans, his head falling onto Tokiya’s hip. “Fuck that was hot.” Ranmaru’s hand moves up the side of Tokiya’s tail. “‘M more than happy to, babe. Fuckin’ way more ‘n happy to.”

Tokiya would assume that it would be gross, even for another mermaid, to press lips against the scales of his tail, but Ranmaru doesn’t show it if it is. Ranmaru uses hands, and lips and teeth to make Tokiya _howl_ \- Tokiya had never felt anything like this. 

When Ranmaru finally leaves Tokiya as nothing but a panting, writhing mess, unable to say anything but Ranmaru’s name, Ranmaru finally takes pity. He pulls Tokiya closer to him, dragging him so that everything up to his chest is in the water and then he ducks his head to kiss the center of Tokiya’s chest. Ranmaru’s tail wraps around Tokiya’s, and while Tokiya would expect it to be too much, it’s just right- heavy and comforting and grounding. Tokiya has to take a long moment to get himself back together. 

“Is… is it always this sensitive?”

Ranmaru grunts. “‘S what makes up fer the fact that nothin’ else really is.”

“Jesus…” Tokiya mumbles. “I’m still seeing white.”

“Then I did it right.”

“Can we sleep here again tonight?” Tokiya mumbles. 

Ranmaru chuckles. “Sure.”

“Now.” Tokiya cuddles closer to Ranmaru, and he manages to drape his fins over Ranmaru’s tail. It’s not perfect, but it’s better. “Mermaid sex.”

Ranmaru snorts. “Gotta love yer subtlety, yeah?” Ranmaru gets quiet for a few seconds, to think of how to start. “So a real long time ago, mermaids were more like humans. The whole, guys have one part ‘n girls ‘ave another. But there was a point where our numbers got low, ‘n somehow ‘r another we evolved ‘n now gender doesn’t really matter. Fer the most part girls still watch the kids, but a lot more girls ‘n girls started breedin’, ‘n the same with guys.”

“I suppose that makes sense why you’re comfortable with this. Gay relationships are still only just becoming accepted, among humans.” It felt strange to say humans, still, but Ranmaru managed with mermaids. And, Tokiya guesses, he’s not human anymore. 

“Yeah. ‘S a lot more normal with us. I’m not gonna go into exact details on how mermaids fuck-” Tokiya can’t help the snort. “But we’ve both got eggs. Means we can both have kids, on both sides ‘a the coin.”

“...We could have actual kids.” Tokiya mumbles. “That’s… an insane thought. Adoption is the closest gay humans can get.”

Ranmaru hums. “Yeah. But think it might still be a ‘lil soon ‘t think about kids, Toki. You barely know how ‘t move around in the ocean.”

Tokiya moves, hiding his face in Ranmaru’s chest. “Is that the only reason?”

“You’ve been a mermaid fer a day, Toki. We should move it a little slower.”

“So you’re saying that if I’d been a mermaid longer, you’d have kids with me?”

“...Yes?”

Tokiya is grinning into Ranmaru’s chest. “Then that’s more than enough. To know that you like me enough that you’d raise children with me.”

Ranmaru snorts. “We’ve known each other almost our entire lives, Toki, ‘n we’ve been together fer years. Don’t forget yer necklace.”

“You’re right.” Tokiya is still smiling, and his voice shows just how giddy he is. “You’re serious about me.”

Ranmaru snorts. “I am. Now go ‘t sleep.”

The next few days, Ranmaru focuses on trying to get Tokiya comfortable swimming. Tokiya’s unsteadiness persists for quite some time, and his biggest difficulty is moving smoothly and controlling himself when he moves fast, but Ranmaru usually stops him before he gets too frustrated. 

While Tokiya is still learning, Ranmaru often had Tokiya riding on his back. 

Ranmaru had been very open that he had places he wanted to bring Tokiya, but that he wanted to wait until Tokiya could move himself around- he insisted that Tokiya would enjoy the areas more if Ranmaru wasn’t carrying him around.

It’s around a week when Ranmaru finally sits himself on a rock to just watch Tokiya swimming around. It made Tokiya a bit nervous. Ranmaru’s eyes meet his. 

_Relax._

_I’m going to hit something._

_You won’t._

_You’ve had to stop me before. I’m going to hit something._

_Haven’t had ‘t fix you in the last two days. All you need is practice ‘n confidence._

Tokiya shakes his head. Ranmaru finally gives a silent sigh as he gets up, and Tokiya’s hope that he’s coming closer is crushed quickly when Ranmaru darts away. 

Tokiya’s response is automatic- because he’s afraid he’s going to lose Ranmaru. His dash isn’t clean, but it gets him moving in the right direction. Ranmaru doesn’t stop so Tokiya doesn’t either, though Tokiya can’t pause himself long enough to fix his stride. 

Tokiya almost gets close enough for his fingers to brush Ranmaru’s tail, but he gets frustrated when he’s still just too far. He narrows his eyes, trying to focus, and when he manages to move his fins he spirals. 

But luckily, he spirals into Ranmaru. His back hits Ranmaru’s, and Ranmaru finally slows. Ranmaru disconnects from Tokiya’s back, but he circles him, so that Ranmaru is now on top of Tokiya, looking at him. 

_Told you._

Tokiya narrows his eyes. 

_That was mean._

_Ya did it, though. I wasn’t even holdin’ back. You caught me fair ‘n square._

_And if I hadn’t?_

_I would’a gone back. But now that you’re this far-_

Ranmaru lets go of Tokiya. Tokiya reaches out, but Ranmaru evades him. This one was just barely. 

_Follow me._

Ranmaru moves slower this time. Tokiya wishes that Ranmaru would help him move, because he still felt like he were swimming sloppily, but Ranmaru lets Tokiya swim pressed up against Ranmaru. 

Tokiya manages to nearly forget about what had just transpired when they swim up to a sunken boat. 

_This is gonna be tougher. Lot’s ‘a tight spaces ‘n you’re gonna have ‘t turn._

_Is this a spot?_

_One of ‘em._

_What’s the story here?_

That makes Ranmaru grin. 

_Story, huh?_

Ranmaru pauses to lean against the doorframe to properly focus on Tokiya before he continues. 

_’Fore I actually went off on my own, when I was still heavy in the community, I went here a lot. Was my place ‘t hide out when I wanted ‘t be by myself, because as far as I knew, far as I still know, no one else found this place. ...Was actually the place I hung out a lot when I left._

Tokiya immediately knows what Ranmaru means, when he says that he left. 

Ranmaru changes the subject. 

_You ready ‘t go check it out?_

Tokiya nods. 

Ranmaru lets Tokiya go in first. The structure is still held together, and doorframes are harder to get into, but Tokiya manages the best that he can, even if he has to pull himself through. It’s interesting, with the rusted ship objects, the kitchen that’s still stocked with dishes and pots and pans. There are clothes that are soggy and barely holding together, clearly from a different time. But Tokiya manages to find a spot in the corner that’s out of the way, but he had caught the sight of something scratched into the wood. 

It’s harder to force his way in close enough to see it because he has to shove aside a few boxes, bloated but still held together despite the water. 

_Toki, wait-_

Ranmaru had tried, but Tokiya had already gotten close enough to see what was written there. Or rather, drawn. 

Tokiya recognizes the first two pictures immediately- two pictures he hadn’t thought about in years. 

_Tokiya and Ranmaru had been sitting on the sand, not long after they had met._

_“I like drawing.” Tokiya says, conversationally. “But I’m not very good at it.”_

_“Show me.”_

_“Huh?”_

_“Draw something.” When Tokiya just watches him, Ranmaru huffs, impatient. “Look.”_

_Ranmaru uses his index finger to begin drawing in a patch of sand. Tokiya watches him as he quickly makes the outline of a misshapen skull, drawing two little eyes in it._

_Tokiya understands. He’s a bit slow to start, and it takes him longer to draw than it did Ranmaru, but he draws what is mostly a penguin, though the feet are wrong. Human like._

_“So you’re not bad.”_

Tokiya smiles widely, seeing the skull and a rough recreation of his penguin, close together on the wall. He reaches out, touching the wood near it. He has to take a moment to appreciate the drawings before his eyes finally slide to the one next to it. It’s a few rough sketches of shells, and it makes Tokiya turn around. 

Ranmaru’s hand is over his eyes. He’s not blushing, but he does look flustered. 

_Shells?_

_Ones I was gonna find for you._

Tokiya stills for just a few seconds, to make sure he’s sending himself in the right direction before he launches himself at Ranmaru, wrapping his arms tightly around him. 

_That’s unbelievably sweet, Ran._

Tokiya’s tail wraps around Ranmaru’s waist, making it nearly impossible for Ranmaru to pry him off, even if he tried. 

_Wasn’t somethin’ I really thought you’d find. ...I kinda forgot it was here._

_I’m glad I found it._

Ranmaru shakes his head, but his arms have wrapped themselves tightly around Tokiya. 

_You gonna let me go?_

_No. If you want to leave, you’re dragging me with you._

Ranmaru gives a silent laugh, but Tokiya feels Ranmaru’s lips land on the side of his head. Ranmaru really doesn’t struggle in bringing Tokiya out, but Tokiya’s tail stays wrapped tightly around Ranmaru, even when they’re out.

The next trip they make isn’t until Tokiya has gotten more confident in swimming. He still can’t propel himself with his fins, but moving around has almost become easy. 

Tokiya and Ranmaru slept underwater now, but Tokiya had a preference for _hearing_ Ranmaru, so they often spent time up in the cove. 

“I wanna bring you ‘t meet everyone else.” Ranmaru says, watching Tokiya’s face for his reaction. “If yer not ready, we can wait- but it should happen at some point.”

“I’m nervous.” Tokiya admits, the end of his tail waving in the water. It’s where his attention stays, rather on the man next to him. “But I’ll do it.”

“They’ll be fine with you.” Ranmaru squeezes Tokiya’s shoulder. “You’re one of us.”

“...Why are my fins different?” Tokiya blurts out. “I’ve been thinking about that a lot. Is… is it because I turned differently?”

“It is.” Ranmaru sighs. “But no one’s gonna care. Just keep an eye out when we get there, yeah? Yer not the only one with fins like yours.”

“Are… are most changed mermaids changed for the reasons you changed me?”

“Not all of ‘em.” Ranmaru’s voice is a bit grim. “Some ‘r turned fer bad reasons. Some of ‘em turned from cruel mermaids. Some of ‘em mistreated our kind. But the community doesn’t take kindly ‘t mermaids that turn humans fer the kill ‘r ‘t new mermaids that ‘r aggressive. But trust me. They’re gonna ask you first. ‘Bout why I changed you. Their first worry ‘s usually that there wasn’t consent.”

“But-”

“Relax.” Ranmaru pulls Tokiya closer to kiss his temple. “You’ve got the shells. Yer not the first case like this. They’re not gonna bother either of us.”

“...Okay.”

“Just stick near me if you’re nervous. You’ll be just fine.”

Tokiya moves, cuddling into Ranmaru’s side, and Ranmaru wraps his arms around Tokiya tightly. Tokiya throws his tail over Ranmaru’s lap. 

“Ran?” Tokiya mumbles. “When we get back, can I touch you?”

Tokiya is expecting a smartass response, but it’s surprisingly genuine. “Sure, Toki. ‘S long as you want to.”

“I do.” Tokiya shifts, pressing his lips to the corner of Ranmaru’s jaw. 

“Then we should head out. We’ll get back a lot faster.”

Tokiya manages a chuckle, but Ranmaru holds onto him as he slides down the sand to get into the water. He does let Tokiya go when they’re under the water, and Tokiya swims by Ranmaru’s side. Tokiya is jumpy, when he begins to see movement from the corner of his eyes, but he doesn’t fully catch sight of more mermaids until they seem to land in the center of the community. When Ranmaru stops swimming and straightens up, Tokiya slips behind him, his tail wrapping around Ranmaru’s waist to tether himself to Ranmaru. Ranmaru’s hand lands just above Tokiya’s fin.

One of the mermaids with a deep green tail watches Ranmaru. Tokiya can only assume that they’re speaking. The three mermaids in the front are all men- all three with longer hair. The man with brown hair has the shortest of the three. The one next to him has a lavender tail and cyan blue hair, his expression blank. The meanest looking of the three is on the end with an ice blue tail, his arms crossed over his chest and blonde hair, the longest of the three. 

Tokiya, almost peering around Ranmaru at this point, sees that the man with the green tail and the one with the blue have long, ribbon like fins- but the man with the purple tail has fins like his own.

Ranmaru turns his head to catch Tokiya’s eye.

_Toki. Left ‘t right. Reiji, Ai, Camus. Closest thing we’ve got ‘t leaders._

_You’re new. Why are you here?_

Tokiya almost jumps at the voice. It’s deep- cold. Tokiya has to glance around, but it’s clear who’s speaking to him when he glances at Camus and Camus is staring directly at his face. Tokiya doesn’t answer, but he straightens up, just enough for his fingers to find his necklace and lift it.

Reiji looks surprised, his grey eyes flickering to Ranmaru. Camus’ eyes haven’t left Tokiya and it’s beginning to almost intimidate him. When Ranmaru turns his head towards Camus, Camus finally backs down and lets Tokiya’s gaze drop.

Tokiya glances behind himself and he notices that they’re surrounded. The mermaids don’t look aggressive- if anything, they seem curious. 

Tokiya feels naked, under the gaze of everyone here. He presses his chest to Ranmaru’s back, but it comes at the price of Ranmaru being unable to talk to him. Tokiya buries his face into Ranmaru’s neck. 

And then, the voices start coming, too many, too quickly. He’s hardly able to even make out gender as they flood him, just figuring out their words is becoming too difficult. 

_Who are you?_

_Did Ranmaru change you?_

_How long have you been here?_

_How long were you human?_

_Why has it taken you so long to visit the community?_

_Are you really one of us?_

_Why are you hiding?_

Tokiya’s head is pounding, and he clings onto Ranmaru tighter. Finally, the voices stop, all at once. And Tokiya manages to look up to see Camus, holding up a hand to silence them. 

Tokiya wonders if Camus has a special power of some sort, because as his eyes sweep across the crowd they all seem to understand. Ranmaru cranes his head, trying to catch sight of Tokiya’s face, and Tokiya finally moves enough for Ranmaru to see him. 

_You okay?_

_My head hurts._

_They didn’t mean anythin’ by it. Just not used ‘t new people. We’ll leave soon._

_Too much, too soon._

Tokiya’s head lands on Ranmaru’s shoulder. He feels tired. 

_Y’did good. No beatin’ yerself up._

Ranmaru glances back towards the leaders. Ai nods. 

When Ranmaru turns around, all eyes are still on Tokiya, but they move to let Ranmaru and Tokiya leave the circle. Ranmaru doesn’t make Tokiya swim. He leaves his hand on Tokiya’s tail. 

Ranmaru makes his way back to the cove, but then he forces Tokiya around, until Tokiya’s sitting on Ranmaru’s lap. 

“Hey. Look at me, babe. You’re gonna be alright.” Tokiya stays quiet, pressing his forehead to Ranmaru’s. “That was good.” Ranmaru promises. “They just forget that it’s a lot. But you did exactly what you needed ‘t do. You did great.”

Tokiya liked it when Ranmaru praised him. It takes him a long moment for his heart to return to a normal speed, even this long after. “I love you.” Tokiya’s voice is exhausted. 

Ranmaru pulls back to kiss Tokiya’s forehead. “I love you, too, babe.” Ranmaru’s arms tighten against Ranmaru’s waist. “I know you wanted ‘t touch me, but I think we should wait ‘til tomorrow.”

“...Alright. I-” Tokiya gets quiet, struggling through his words. “Is- would it be right of me to ask _you_ to touch _me_ tonight?”

Ranmaru’s eyebrows furrow, and Tokiya’s already coming up with his apology, to backtrack, but Ranmaru answers first. “‘Course.”

The only other time that Tokiya had asked this of Ranmaru was the night that Ranmaru had changed him. Ranmaru often chose to do it himself- but Tokiya knew it did worry Ranmaru, both times Tokiya had asked. But Ranmaru turns them, to lay Tokiya on his back.

Ranmaru had admitted to Tokiya that most of Tokiya’s sensitive spots were also Ranmaru’s- but that he had found a few spots on Tokiya that were more sensitive on Tokiya than they were on Ranmaru. 

Ranmaru takes his time today. He starts on Tokiya’s chest, near his shoulders. Tokiya had learned that his chest was just as sensitive as it had always been- but it was nothing, compared to his tail. Tokiya still moaned, when Ranmaru began marking his chest. 

Half of his sensitivity- the pleasure in the actions, it all came from Ranmaru. 

As Ranmaru travels down, Tokiya keeps pulling him up, to pull him into a kiss. Ranmaru goes easily every time and stays longer every time. It does happen less when Ranmaru gets to Tokiya’s tail. He had learned exactly where to bite and exactly how hard to get Tokiya squirming. Ranmaru really hadn’t lied when he told Tokiya that it never got less sensitive. 

Ranmaru goes just a bit further tonight than he usually does, until Tokiya is nearly sobbing. Ranmaru finally pulls him closer, mouthing kisses against his neck- not marking, or teasing. Just affectionate kisses that trail down to Tokiya’s shoulder. 

“Too much?” Ranmaru mumbles.

Tokiya shakes his head, though his voice is almost a gasp. “Just right.”

“Good.” Ranmaru’s tail winds around Tokiya’s, and Tokiya, almost on instinct now, curves his tail to perfectly fill in the gaps. They’re wound together tightly- no current or creature _could_ manage to pull them apart. 

Ranmaru holds him tightly. They slept in the cove more often than they should, though, like tonight, they usually slept with their heads just under the water, laying on the sloping sand. 

Ranmaru holds him far past when they wake up. Tokiya hadn’t forgotten their deal, but there’s nothing in him that wants to pull away from Ranmaru just yet.

It’s a long time before Ranmaru finally starts to shift, slowly unwrapping his tail from Tokiya’s. Tokiya leans up to kiss the center of Ranmaru’s chest. 

There aren’t spoken words, but when Tokiya moves to Ranmaru’s neck, where it meets his shoulder, Ranmaru only moves further up, onto the land, and brings Tokiya with him. Tokiya is on top this time. 

Ranmaru wasn’t lying, when he said that he wasn’t very sensitive. If anything, as Tokiya marks and kisses Ranmaru’s chest, he seems almost relaxed. It’s when Tokiya reaches his tail that Ranmaru does begin to speak. 

“I’m gonna walk you through this, okay?”

Tokiya nods, paying close attention. 

Just like the first night they had gone all of the way, when Tokiya had led Ranmaru’s hands, this time Ranmaru leads Tokiya’s. Tokiya presses into the spots the way Ranmaru had pressed into his the night before, and his heart speeds up at Ranmaru’s low moans. It’s almost like Tokiya can hear Ranmaru’s heart beating faster. 

It isn’t until Tokiya’s felt around, found all of Ranmaru’s special spots, that Tokiya goes to press his mouth to Ranmaru’s tail. 

Tokiya wouldn’t remember all of the spots just yet- but he remembered the spots Ranmaru told him not to touch. He avoids them carefully. 

The one spot he really does remember is Ranmaru’s ribboned fins, because they got very pretty noises out of Ranmaru. Tokiya couldn’t make him howl, the way Ranmaru had made him, but the cove is filled with Ranmaru's deep moans and the occasional whine when Tokiya hit something just right and that was more than enough for Tokiya. 

“You’re so pretty.” Tokiya sighs, pressing a kiss to Ranmaru’s hip when Ranmaru finally laced his fingers through Tokiya’s hair, silently letting him know it was enough. “Thank you.”

Ranmaru gives a tired laugh. “Dunno that you need ‘t thank me for this, Toki.”

“I do.” Tokiya insists. “Seeing this side of you is something I wouldn’t give up for anything.”

Ranmaru gives another laugh. 

That was one thing that Tokiya hated about being underwater. He never got to hear Ranmaru’s laugh. 

It just meant that he appreciated it more when he did. 

Tokiya pulls Ranmaru down, settling himself on top of Ranmaru. He wasn’t worried about being too heavy, in the water enough for his pressure to lighten. He tilts his head up to kiss the tip of Ranmaru’s nose. 

“My quality of life is so much better.” Tokiya sighs. “...I know you had tried your best, Ran, but leaving the cove- having things to do and places to explore… it’s so much better. But even the cove was better than my life would have been, had you let me leave. Thank you.”

“It was as much fer me as it was for you.” Ranmaru admits. “I didn’t wanna let you leave.”

“Life partners.” Tokiya sighs, a soft smile on his face. “I’m glad.”

“Me too, Toki.”

It’s hard to tell the exact passage of time, but it doesn’t feel like it’s much longer before Ranmaru takes Tokiya on their next field trip. 

“C’mon. Got somethin’ else ‘t show you.”

Tokiya nods. When they go under the water, and Tokiya follows Ranmaru, he tries turning his fins as he moves. He’s been working on it. He still does the occasional spiral, but he had gotten better at moving faster and Ranmaru had gotten better at catching him when he lost control. 

It was an even trade-off. 

Tokiya is already interested when they reach an open area, surrounded by bright coral. If they were on land, in a forest, Tokiya would call it a clearing. The water here is warm and the sun casts a beautiful sheen through the water and onto the white sand. 

_The story?_

Tokiya is staring at the side of Ranmaru’s face from the spot where he stopped. 

Ranmaru gives Tokiya a crooked smile that gets Tokiya to perk up. It was a wonderful sight. 

_This is where I found yer shells._

Tokiya grins upon hearing it. 

He does give Ranmaru a few seconds, to make sure that he didn’t have anything else to tell Tokiya, but he’s quick to explore. It really is beautiful. The ship had an awful lot of charm, but most of it came from how unique it was to Tokiya, and the fact that Ranmaru shared it with him. This place shares both of those reasons, but it had a natural beauty that was undeniable, too. Tokiya unearths a few shells, and examines the brightly colored coral with curiosity. The way he’s moving here as opposed to the ship is like night and day. Ranmaru is content to watch him for a long moment, before Tokiya hears his call. 

_Toki. C’mere._

Tokiya turns, catching Ranmaru’s eye, and he heads over. Ranmaru’s expression was still soft, but there was an underlying seriousness. 

Tokiya’s eyes widen when Ranmaru takes his necklace, but he places the shells in his palms and holds out his hands. 

_Which shell is yer favorite?_

Tokiya has to really look at them, but he does settle on his favorite. It’s a slightly misshapen one, but it has a beautiful purple sheen with underlying hints of blue. Many of the shells were a near perfect shell shape, but this one had clearly been snapped- by weather, Tokiya was sure, rather than Ranmaru. 

But this shell perfectly matched Ranmaru’s, because Ranmaru’s shell was the other half of the same shell. 

Ranmaru undoes the necklace, to take the shell. He puts it back together with nimble fingers, even with the shell tucked carefully in his hand, and he slides it back on Tokiya’s neck. Ranmaru’s next step is to unwind the matching shell from his belt. 

_Stay ‘ere._

Tokiya just nods, still extremely confused. Ranmaru isn’t gone long- and Tokiya can still see him, though it’s just an outline. Ranmaru’s ducked himself behind coral, messing with something Tokiya can’t see. 

When Ranmaru does come back around, a few minutes later, Tokiya’s eyes drop to his hands. Ranmaru is holding two bands, the shells weaved carefully into the seaweed. One band is just a bit bigger than the other. Ranmaru takes the smaller one, and he kisses the shell, holding it to his lips for a long few seconds before he takes Tokiya’s hand and slides on the bracelet. 

Before Tokiya can ask him what this means, Ranmaru offers him the second bracelet. Tokiya takes it, but he tilts his head. Ranmaru doesn’t verbally answer- he instead nods towards Tokiya’s new bracelet. Tokiya slowly lifts the shell to his lips, holding it for just a bit longer than Ranmaru had before he slips it on Ranmaru’s wrist.

_A ritual?_

_Wouldn’t use that word-_

Ranmaru’s thought sounds amused in Tokiya’s head. 

_More like tradition. …’S usually a ring, but I figured this fit us both better._

Tokiya pauses, taking it in, and then slowly a smile begins to spread across his face, growing wider. 

_Is this a proposal?_

_We don’t have formal marriages. So I guess that in human words, I married you._

_We’re married?_

_We’re married._

Tokiya rushes Ranmaru, wrapping his arms around his neck and pressing his lips to Ranmaru’s. 

The kiss stays soft for a long moment before Ranmaru finally dips Tokiya, deepening the kiss. They hold it for a few long moments, and when they pull away, it seems like they’re forcing themselves to do so. 

Tokiya gives Ranmaru a bright, closed-eye smile. Ranmaru offers him a smile in return. 

_All of your traditions are so sweet. I’m glad I get to experience them with you._

_We really shouldn’t ‘a met._

Ranmaru’s thought sounds musing- rather than grim, incredulous, or upset. 

_But fuck I’m glad we did._

Tokiya’s arms haven’t left Ranmaru, but he pulls himself closer, his tail winding around Ranmaru’s. He glances at the back of Ranmaru’s head. 

_How long have you planned this?_

_Since a ‘lil before I dragged you ‘t the community. I needed them ‘t see you, ‘fore I could go through with it. ‘Fore I could have any kids. Courtin’ you wasn’t a big deal, but I needed ‘t introduce you ‘fore I set my entire life up with you. ...Datin’ human’s isn’t a real big approved thing ‘ere- but if there were any chance I gave you the bracelet… married you- ‘r heaven forbid cross-species kids… wouldn’t be okay. But that ‘asn’t been a problem ‘n it’s not gonna be. You’ve got the all-clear from the community. What we do is between you ‘n I now._

_That’s strange. But I’m glad it’s been settled._

_All settled. ‘N now you’re mine._

Tokiya pauses for a long moment. He wants to speak to Ranmaru, and that’s the only reason he doesn’t bury his face in Ranmaru’s neck. 

_So you really do want to have kids with me?_

_Yeah. I do._

Tokiya smiles. He finally lets his face settle into Ranmaru’s neck, but his smile is wide enough that he knows Ranmaru can feel it. 

Tokiya does manage to pull Ranmaru down without separating from him, and they sit in the watery clearing for hours. They stay quiet, with Tokiya curled up against Ranmaru, a small smile staying on his face. When he looked at the shell wound tightly on his wrist, he can’t help but see it in a different way. 

To say he was happy would be an understatement. 

When Ranmaru finally lets Tokiya know that they need to leave, Ranmaru lets Tokiya ride on his back. Tokiya could swim easily at this point, but he wasn’t one to deny Ranmaru’s offer if it meant that Tokiya didn’t need to let Ranmaru go.

Ranmaru takes them back to the cove. 

It was growing later, but Tokiya had taken his chance to pin Ranmaru beneath him. 

“Think I should be the one gettin’ my hands on you.” 

Despite Ranmaru’s ‘protest’, he made no move to switch his place with Tokiya. Tokiya drops his lips to Ranmaru’s neck. “Later.” Tokiya promises. “For now, I want to thank you. I want to show you how happy you’ve made me- in all of our time together. Not just today.”

Ranmaru opens his mouth- but all that comes out is a sigh when Tokiya begins to make his way down Ranmaru’s chest, to his stomach. Tokiya does focus on his chest, though it’s mostly peppering kisses to his skin, still drying from the short time they’ve been on land. 

Tokiya is proud of himself when he gets to Ranmaru’s tail and remembers most of Ranmaru’s most sensitive spots- and he definitely remembers what spots not to go near. 

He slows down, on Ranmaru’s tail, so he can properly appreciate the moans, deep and coming from Ranmaru’s chest. If anything, Ranmaru sounds more excited tonight than he had been before. Tokiya is relentless, determined to make Ranmaru feel good. 

Ranmaru finally laces his fingers in Tokiya’s hair, and that’s when Tokiya finally pulls back. Ranmaru pulls him up, pressing his feverishly hot lips against Tokiya’s. 

This was something Tokiya _didn’t_ like about being on land. Their kiss only lasted less than a minute, because they had to pull back to breathe. 

The never-ending kisses were nice.

Ranmaru doesn’t let Tokiya pull him under the water, choosing to instead knock him down and hold him close. “Give me a minute.” Ranmaru mumbles. 

Tokiya hums.

It doesn’t stop him from being surprised when Ranmaru flips them over after he’s had some time to recover. Ranmaru grins at him, his energy already back. 

Ranmaru leans down to press a kiss against Tokiya’s lips, and when he pulls back, he’s more serious. 

“Did you really wanna have kids with me, Toki?”

“Of course.” Tokiya’s eyes search Ranmaru’s face. 

“‘M… not makin’ any promises. This might not work ‘til the thirtieth time we do it, but it might work the first. But I wanna go further with you. But that brings the risk that we could…”

“Have kids.” Tokiya finishes. He watches Ranmaru’s face closely- and then he smiles, before pulling Ranmaru back down. When he speaks, it’s mumbled against Ranmaru’s lips. “I’d love to go further.”

Ranmaru’s grin is back, and his next kiss is hungry. “‘M fuckin’ glad you agree.”

It takes a few days before anything happens- though it’s only the next day that Ranmaru and Tokiya sit in the cove and speak about the possibility.

“Are mermaid children different than human children?”

“‘Course they are. ...The biggest change is that they’re eggs, ‘n y’don’t just get one ‘r two. It can go anywhere from about five ‘t twenty.”

“Five to twenty.” Tokiya mumbles, almost shocked. 

“We won’t take care of ‘em ‘til they’re grown. Not all of ‘em.” Tokiya tilts his head. “Some of ‘em are gonna be more adept at survin’ than others, but I doubt any of ‘em are gonna hatch just knowin’ how ‘t swim. So that’s our main job. Care for ‘em, teach ‘em how to survive, ‘n then some of ‘em are gonna leave.”

“...How quickly?”

“Probably ‘bout a year fer most of ‘em. That’s about when they learn ‘t swim.”

“Only… most. Right?”

Ranmaru shifts, moving closer to Tokiya to hold him closer. “Only most.” Ranmaru assures. “‘M sure there’ll be a few of ‘em that aren’t ready ‘t leave the nest.”

“How… how long did you stay?”

“Only a ‘lil longer than the first batch that left. Think four ‘r five of my siblings stuck around longer, but… that’s a lot.”

“They’ll be okay, right?” Tokiya’s voice is quiet. Ranmaru pulls Tokiya onto his lap.

“‘Course they will be. We’ll still see ‘em around, too, probably in the community. But they won’t leave until they feel like they’re ready.”

“That’s… awfully bittersweet. Human children stay for about eighteen years.”

“I know, babe. But most couples have a few batches of kids at least. ‘N anywhere up ‘t twenty kids at once is a lot fer any two parents ‘t handle.”

“I know. ...I know.”

“It’ll be okay.” Ranmaru’s hand rubs Tokiya’s back. “I promise.”

“...And how… will I be having these children?”

“It’s not bad.” Ranmaru promises. “Yer body changes in yer sleep- ‘n you don’t carry around the eggs. They start real small, ‘n you’ve just gotta bury ‘em underwater ‘n watch ‘em.”

“Watch them? Is that all?”

Ranmaru winces a bit. “Watchin’ ‘em is less for their growin’ ‘n more ‘t keep other creatures ‘n other mermaids away.”

“What would happen, if another mermaid found them?”

“...Best case scenario, they’d steal ‘em. ...More ‘n likely, they’d kill them.”

“Why?” Tokiya’s voice is horrified. 

Ranmaru sighs. “Mermaid’s are jealous, territorial creatures. ‘S not until you’re an actual mermaid that you’re one of ‘em. ...If they would’a _seen_ me changing you, they would’a stopped me. At our base, when it doesn’t involve us- we don’t want more. It’s just… ingrained.”

“You don’t-”

“I don’t.” Ranmaru assures. “I’ve never touched an egg in my life.”

Tokiya sighs. “That’s… insane.”

“I dunno how the parental instincts ‘r gonna kick in- but even if you _can’t_ keep up guardin’ ‘em, I’m gonna be watchin’ ‘em too. ‘N if we sleep in the cove, it’s a lot more protected, too. They’ll be okay.”

“When will I know if… I’m… bearing eggs?”

“Next few days, probably.”

“How do you know so much?”

“I worked with kids a lot. ...My mom didn’t have a life partner, either. She mostly served fer havin’ kids for the community. So on top ‘a the normal schoolin’ we get when we’re guppies, me ‘n my siblings had ‘t have some extra learnin’ so we didn’t assume that we were supposed ‘t be like our mom. So we knew we were supposed ‘t find _one_ person.”

Tokiya sighs, but he finally falls silent, out of questions. 

It was only about two days later when Tokiya had woken up. There wasn’t much pain- but it was almost like a stomach ache, only it was just a bit lower than his stomach. He shifts, but he sits up quickly when he feels something between his and Ranmaru’s stomach. He tries to unwind his tail from Ranmaru’s, but when Ranmaru feels Tokiya pulling, his tail winds tighter around Tokiya, his eyes opening. He’s up quickly, one hand on Tokiya and the other searching for a threat. Tokiya ignores Ranmaru for now, to quickly move the eggs that are resting on the base of the sand, and that’s when Ranmaru finally looks down. 

Ranmaru sighs, relaxing. His tail slowly, and a bit begrudgingly, unwinds from Tokiya’s. Tokiya is _very_ awake now. 

It does feel like it’s awfully soon- they had only gotten married a few days ago. And that wasn’t even considering the fact that they had _actual_ children. 

Guppies.

Two men had children. It was never not going to be strange to Tokiya. 

But he and Ranmaru had spoken about the idea of children for a very long time, and that’s the thought that he sticks on. 

“I need to… bury them. Yes?”

Ranmaru just nods. 

Tokiya digs the spot there, in a spot underneath the water, and it must not be wrong because Ranmaru doesn’t stop him. Tokiya puts them carefully into the hole he had managed to dig, trying to ignore the uncomfortable feeling of sand under his nails. He counts the pale yellow eggs as he puts them into the hole. 

When they’re all in, he counts nine. 

Ranmaru smooths over the hole for Tokiya, making a small, subtle indent with his finger. To avoid panic later, Tokiya assumes. Most likely Tokiya’s panic.

Ranmaru brings his hand up to cradle the side of his face. “Calm down. You’re panickin’ Toki.”

“This… sounds stupid.” Tokiya gives a nervous laugh. “But I’m not sure that I’m… ready? Prepared? I’m really not sure what to do.”

“I’ll be here with ya. ‘N it’s only two weeks. They hatch real fast.”

Tokiya turns, and it’s a bit awkward to get his tail stretched properly around where his- _their_ eggs were, but he manages. Ranmaru watches him for a moment, but he frowns when Tokiya simply sits there. 

“This is a big deal. ‘N protectin’ them is real important, Toki, but you can’t just not sleep fer two weeks.”

“I’ll be fine.” Tokiya insists. “I just want to watch them. I’ll fall asleep.”

Ranmaru clearly doesn’t believe that. Ranmaru settles down, but he keeps his head on the dry sand. His eyes don’t close. He just watches Tokiya. 

“You can sleep.” Tokiya insists. 

“I will when you do. I told you. The cave’s pretty safe ‘n we’re both in here. Nothin’s gonna get them.”

Tokiya hesitates, but when he lays down, he’s still over the eggs. Ranmaru links their tails, just by the end.

“I’ll wake up if anyone gets near.” Ranmaru promises. “‘N they won’t be goin’ for us, anyways. The eggs ‘r gonna be just fine, babe.”

“I know.” Tokiya mumbles. “...I know.”

Ranmaru reaches out, holding Tokiya’s hand, the eggs in between them. Ranmaru squeezes his hand. “Try ‘t get some rest.”

“I’ll… try.”

Tokiya does manage to fall asleep- but as soon as he’s awake, he’s back, curled in front of the eggs. 

Outwardly, Ranmaru doesn’t seem anywhere near as worried as Tokiya does- but when Ranmaru suggests that Tokiya get away from the eggs, he only suggests switching places. He doesn’t once suggest leaving the eggs alone.

This is how the next week goes- but Tokiya doesn’t leave the cove at all. Ranmaru is forced to bring him fish to eat. 

Fish wasn’t nearly as bad as it had been when he was a human- and it was nice, being able to live off of it. There were quite a few trout around the cove, which was lucky because Ranmaru had figured out quickly that trout was Tokiya’s favorite. He got a lot of it, watching over their eggs. 

By the second week, Tokiya’s tail was consistently cramping up from lack of movement, and there wasn’t enough water to keep Tokiya from starting to dry out. 

“I’m not lettin’ yer health deteriorate. Not when I can watch over the eggs, too. Go. Git. Swim around fer a while, because you need a break and some proper rest.”

Tokiya is slow in leaving- and even when he does, Ranmaru notices Tokiya’s head breaching the water to watch over Ranmaru and the eggs. 

Around the fifth time, Ranmaru rolls his eyes. 

“They’re fine, Toki.”

“I’m checking on you, too.” Tokiya insists firmly. “All of you.”

Ranmaru sighs. “We’re all fine, babe. Just take some time fer yourself.”

Tokiya sighs, but he goes back under the water. 

Ranmaru is stricter with the last week, not letting Tokiya stay in the cove for the rest of it- usually making him leave every other day. 

They were both in the cove on the day that Ranmaru had assured Tokiya they were going to hatch. Ranmaru had told Tokiya earlier that he had seen quite a few batches hatch before and had gotten used to the sight. 

The eggs _were_ much larger. It worried Tokiya, moving them further towards the edge of the cove, but they had no choice because the eggs were too large to keep them where they were. 

But Ranmaru had been right. They had waited hours, but finally the eggs had started shifting. Tokiya watches Ranmaru with wide eyes when he picks one up. 

“They can’t break outta ‘em. They’re too thick.”

“That’s… a terrible design flaw.”

Ranmaru snorts, but he hands the egg he’s holding to Tokiya. “Watch me ‘n copy.”

Ranmaru takes another, one that had been moving more. Tokiya feels the egg in his hands moving, too. Ranmaru rapts on the very top of the egg until a thin line begins to appear on it. He gets the crack fairly large, and then stops. Tokiya follows his actions. 

Finally, the egg in Tokiya’s hand begins to crack more. Ranmaru’s attention is on the egg in Tokiya’s hands. Tokiya’s entire expression softens when the egg breaks enough for a small hand to break out of it. 

“Now’s when you wanna help ‘im pry the egg open.” Ranmaru mumbles. Tokiya’s hands hesitate, but Ranmaru actually flashes him a smile. “‘Ere. I’ll show you.” 

They trade eggs, and when Ranmaru gets the cracked egg, he carefully takes both hands to split the egg in half. Tokiya’s eyes widen, seeing the boy. He’s only a bit smaller than a toddler. He has black hair and grey eyes, and his tail is a reddish purple. It’s swishing, but when he finally starts to go anywhere, it’s towards the floor, and Ranmaru catches him in time. 

Tokiya’s attention becomes torn, because the egg in his lap is now starting to move, but everything in him wants to reach for the first guppy. 

Ranmaru sees it, and he gets a small, fond smile on his face. 

“You wanna be on guppy wranglin’ duty instead.”

Tokiya’s eyes lift to the boy, and he nods. Ranmaru chuckles, laying the discards of the shell in his lap to the sand next to him. Holding the boy with both of his hands, he offers him to Tokiya, and Tokiya takes him gently. Ranmaru takes the next egg as he pulls away. This child already has two hands clawing their way out of the shell. Tokiya cradles the already energetic guppy, his tail swishes in the air, but he’s making grabby hands at Tokiya’s face. Tokiya finds himself cooing. 

“Y’should be able ‘t handle two- but y’might wanna move over into the more shallow water. Make a sort ‘a blockade. Nine squirmin’ guppies ‘r gonna be hard ‘t hold onto.”

Tokiya nods, but there’s still a smile on his face. He moves, so that he’s still sitting near Ranmaru, Ranmaru’s tail brushing his back. Tokiya folds his tail underneath him, but he’s yet to set down the first boy. 

It’s less than a minute later when Ranmaru hands him the next one- a girl with silver hair and blue eyes, her tail fully purple. Both kids had ribbon fins. Tokiya holds them both in his arms while he still can, but the girl is even more rambunctious than the boy, turning and twisting and writing, grabbing and pulling, trying to climb up Tokiya. Tokiya can’t help but laugh when she giggles brightly.

The third is a girl, almost identical to the second, but with a red tail instead of purple. Tokiya puts the second girl in the water in front of him, but when he tries to place down the boy, he cries, reaching for Tokiya, and Tokiya cradles him in his arm again. The boy quiets down. 

“Think ‘ve found one ‘a the ‘lil guys that ‘r gonna stick around.”

The fourth is another boy. He’s quiet, with blueish black hair, pink eyes, and a rust colored tail. When Tokiya tries to hold him, he struggles out of Tokiya’s hands, so Tokiya sets him down. The fifth is another boy- grey hair, grey eyes and and a purple tail. The sixth is a girl, and she also clings to Tokiya. She has the blue-ish black hair, but her eyes are mismatched, one blue and one grey. Her tail is red. When Tokiya gets to the seventh, another boy that is almost identical to Ranmaru with his grey hair, grey and pink eyes and red tail, he sits with Ranmaru. He won’t let go long enough to go to Tokiya. He does willingly sit with Ranmaru as Ranmaru opens the next two eggs. 

The first of the last two is a girl, though she looks an awful lot like Tokiya, with his dark hair, blue eyes and purple tail. She’s content to sit in the water, leaning against Tokiya’s tail. 

The last is a boy. His hair is a very dark grey, and his eyes are mismatched, too- pink and blue. His tail is reddish purple. 

He’s another one that only wants to go in the water. 

Ranmaru brings his own little mini-me over when he goes to sit next to Tokiya. For a long moment, they watch the guppies. They can’t really move, because all of them are just wildly swishing their tails, only managing to splash the others in the pool with them. 

“They’re safe?” Tokiya asks, watching Ranmaru’s face. 

“We can’t let ‘em outta our sight ‘til they know how ‘ta take care of themselves, but the mermaids ain’t gonna touch ‘em. ‘Course- one of the big things, too, is that they don’t feel anythin’ in the eggs, but now they’re really sentient. They feel pain, ‘n emotions now. Look at ‘im-” Tokiya looks at the boy, still cradled in his arm. “Could you hurt ‘im? Even if he wasn’t yours.”

“Never.” Tokiya almost recoils at the thought. The boy is half asleep now, his tail waving sleepily in the air. “Never.”

“Exactly.”

That night is the first night they sleep with the guppies. Tokiya and Ranmaru sleep towards the top of the cove. They aren’t fully under the water, but the guppies are. Tokiya and Ranmaru keep the ends of their tails linked, to keep the babies from going into the sea. Tokiya would be heartbroken if any of them managed to fall in and get lost, too little to do anything about it. 

Some of them sleep, some of them play- the little girl and boy that had clung to Tokiya sleep curled against Tokiya’s chest. Ranmaru’s mini-me lays across Ranmaru’s face. Tokiya wishes he had a camera. 

It’s only about a week or two before they’re old enough to really start training them how to swim. Ranmaru had said that they age about the same as human children, but Tokiya doesn’t believe it. They were nowhere near little kids yet, but they were already about toddler size. 

Tokiya was in charge of making sure the toddlers didn’t manage to get away, and Ranmaru took them in twos to try to get them to swim. 

It’s going to be a process, Tokiya can tell immediately- but it goes as alright as it can, until the last two. The boy and the girl, Shino and Yuki, refuse to leave Tokiya to go to Ranmaru. 

Hiro, Ranmaru’s mini-me, was also rather clingy, but it was usually with Ranmaru. It was clear how he tried to mimic Ranmaru every chance he got. 

_Guess you’re gonna have ‘t be their teacher._

Ranmaru doesn’t seem that bothered>

_I am not qualified._

Tokiya was not nearly as calm as Ranmaru. 

_You’ll be alright._

Ranmaru assures. 

_You’ve been watchin’ me. Just give it a shot._

Tokiya sighs, but he gets up while Ranmaru takes his place. Tokiya, despite his nerves, smiles a bit when he watches Ranmaru coral one of the kids back to the group, and smiles wider when he sees Hiro try to do the same- though not quite as smoothly as Ranmaru. 

They had, of course, named all of the children- but Ranmaru and Tokiya were both sure which of the guppies would stay, and they were Hiro, Shino and Yuki. 

Tokiya does his best, holding Yuki up with a hand on her stomach, trying to teach her in a way that Ranmaru had taught him. 

He does the same with Shino after her. 

It hadn’t gone as well as it had with Ranmaru and his guppies he trained, but it didn’t go as badly as Tokiya worried it might. 

At night, the kids sleep on top of Tokiya and Ranmaru. Hiro still finds his way on Ranmaru’s face, and Shino and Yuki both cuddle up to Tokiya’s chest. The rest of the kids keep Ranmaru and Tokiya apart, with the exception of their tails, twisted at the end, and their hands- stretched across the children, their hands interlaced. 

Tokiya had panicked when the kids had learned to swim, only a few months in. 

_Relax._

Ranmaru had met Tokiya’s eyes. 

_They aren’t ready yet. They know that. They won’t leave ‘til they are._

_It’s going to be hard, Ran._

_I know. It’ll be okay._

The next lesson is catching fish. Ranmaru is, once again, the best teacher in this subject, but Tokiya gets stuck helping not only Shino and Yuki, but Hiro, too. 

Because as time passed, Hiro had seen the way that Ranmaru really did rely on Tokiya- and Hiro started doing it, too. 

And when Tokiya had gotten scared by a large passing fish- it hadn’t been a threat, it had just startled him, Hiro had jumped forward, in Tokiya’s defense. 

It made Ranmaru burst out into silent laughter before he had come over to ruffle Hiro’s hair. Tokiya couldn’t hear his words, but he knew that Ranmaru was praising Hiro. 

But the time for some of the kids to leave came far quicker than Tokiya was ready for.

Tokiya even missed being occasionally beaten in his sleep when the kids would get rowdy. 

Tokiya had still kissed all six of them on the forehead before they had gone. Ranmaru had just ruffled their hair. 

_Make us proud._

Tokiya had cried, sitting in the cave. 

Yuki and Shino had cried, too- because Tokiya was crying. Hiro had sat on the other side of Tokiya to hug him, trying to make him feel better, the way Ranmaru would. Ranmaru sat in front of him, the end of his tail winding with Tokiya’s. 

That night, all three guppies had slept next to Tokiya. They were too young to anchor themselves to anything else, so they typically anchored themselves to Tokiya. 

Tokiya has to go through the feelings again when the guppies go to school. They’re only to be gone for a few hours, but Tokiya had worked himself up anyways- badly enough that all three kids hesitated, but Hiro seemed downright unwilling. Ranmaru had ruffled Hiro’s hair, and he had made eye contact with all three of them. 

Whatever he had said had worked, because they had left- and Ranmaru pulled Tokiya in the cove to properly wrap himself around Tokiya, his tail intertwining tightly with his and his arms wrapping around Tokiya. 

“They’ll be fine. It’s good for ‘em.”

“I know.” Tokiya hiccups. Ranmaru rubs the back of his neck. “How did- how did you get them to leave?"

Ranmaru gives a slightly strained smile. “I promised ‘em all you’d be okay. Told Hiro I could take care of ya.” 

Tokiya gives a weak laugh. “That’s sweet.”

“‘S true, too. ‘M no liar, Toki. ‘M gonna take good care of ya.” Ranmaru grins at him, and this one is different. Tokiya manages a hum. 

“It has been a while.”

“We have some time before they come back. I’m plannin’ ‘t go real slow.”

Hiro is the last to leave the nest. Shino and Yuki do eventually leave, slowly learning how to become more independent but promising Tokiya they’d come back- and they do. 

But Hiro begins skipping school and leaving for longer and longer, and Tokiya genuinely does begin feeling concerned. So one day- Ranmaru follows him. 

“If he’s doin’ somethin’ dangerous, I’ll stop ‘im. But if he’s just explorin’ his own independence, Toki-”

“You’ll let him continue.” Tokiya sighs. “I know.”

But when Ranmaru had come back, Ranmaru’s face is unreadable. 

“Come with me tomorrow. It’s best if you see.” 

It worried Tokiya- but when the next day swung around, Tokiya went with Ranmaru, trailing Hiro at a distance. 

Tokiya surfaces, just enough to see, but he’s confused because this is his old home. One of the windows are open and he can see two men- one cooking, his deep blue hair cut in a way Tokiya hadn’t seen before, framing his pale face- and an orange haired man, holding the other man by the waist, his skin far more tan than his partner’s. And then Tokiya sees Hiro, just under the waves, waiting for the men to move from the window, presumably to speak to the teenage boy his age, seemingly waiting for him. 

The boy is clearly the son of the men in the house. 

Tokiya can almost see himself reflected in the boy, though his appearance clearly doesn’t match. 

But he sees it in the expression- the way the boy gazes longingly into the sea. Waiting for Hiro. 

Tokiya does find himself with a smile. 

“...I suppose that’s alright.” Tokiya says quietly. “If he’s happy. ...I just truly, truly hope it works.”

Ranmaru’s head lands on Tokiya’s shoulder. “Worked fer us.”

Tokiya gives a light laugh. “It worked for us.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings ; injuries, blood, fighting, children (and problems with children, particularly aggression)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't going to continue this but then I got an idea, haha  
> There's (at least) one more chapter to this, too

Hiro eventually stopped showing back up to the cove.

Tokiya had been worried, and Ranmaru had insisted that it was hard- but he had stayed with them far longer than most guppies normally would. 

“I miss them.” Tokiya’s voice breaks, curled up to Ranmaru on the sand of their cove. “How will I know if something happens to them? They’re all just kids, Ran.”

Ranmaru sighs, rubbing Tokiya’s back and kissing Tokiya’s forehead. His tail moves, intertwining with Tokiya’s. “They’re alright. ‘N Hiro’s alright, too. They know how to take care ‘a themselves.”

“I want them back.” Tokiya admits, burying his face into the crook of Ranmaru’s neck. “I never thought I wanted children but… I… I didn’t want them to leave.”

Ranmaru just holds him tighter. 

Tokiya can’t sleep that night. Ranmaru’s arms do relax, when he can no longer stay awake to watch over Tokiya, and Tokiya is slow and careful in pulling his tail away from Ranmaru’s. There is one time when Ranmaru’s tail flexes in his sleep, trying to hold onto Tokiya’s, but Tokiya had gotten enough control of his tail that he manages to evade it. 

It’s far easier to slip out of Ranmaru’s arms. 

He’s quiet when he makes his way out of the sandy cove and into the deeper waters, heading back towards his old home. There isn’t much relief when he sees a spot that Hiro had clearly set up under the water for himself, because Hiro isn’t there. It makes Tokiya frantic- but no matter where he searches these waters, he can’t find the boy. 

His head lifts over the water, but he sees no one. The lights in the house are off, and it’s clear that Hiro didn’t drag himself onto the sand recently- though there are footprints. It must not have been very long since someone had been out. Tokiya would have to guess, based off of the size of the footprints, that it was the child. 

But if Hiro weren’t here, he must be _somewhere_. Tokiya swims off quickly, hoping to catch him nearby. He checks any spots that he knows of- even unlikely ones. He checks the ship. The coral reef. A spot that’s heavy in fish- an easy place to catch food. 

He had a list of other places to check, like a warmer spot in the ocean that was nice to sleep in, and the spot he and Ranmaru had trained the guppies to swim, but he finds luck with the spot he checks in before it. 

Bad luck- but luck nonetheless. 

Tokiya checks the community. As he nears it, he sees no other mermaids, until he gets to the center and there’s a circle. It isn’t hard to push his way through, because he just lifts himself higher. And then he darts into the center- because all of these mermaids had been circling _his son_. 

When Tokiya’s tail wraps around Hiro, it’s not in the way he does it with Ranmaru. He’s covering his son the best that he can with his tail and his arms, keeping him in a protective hold. 

He looks at the leader that is just a bit more in the center than the others. Camus. 

He could feel the boy beneath him shaking, but he isn’t sure if it’s fear or anger. Camus’ eyes are narrowed. 

Tokiya knows _he’s_ angry. There are serious, angry looks all throughout the circle. 

_Get out of the way, Tokiya._

Camus’ thought in Tokiya’s head is cold. 

_What is this?_

_Your son has broken the laws of our community by revealing himself to a human, and frequenting visits with said human._

_And why is that a problem?_ The thought is fiery. _I was once human._

 _That is a situation we can not control._ The voice in his head is different. There are quite a few eyes on Tokiya, but Tokiya knows this look comes from the blue-haired leader, Ai. _This is one that we can._

_I don’t understand. He’s a child- why are you treating him like a criminal?_

_Until this situation is righted-_ This voice is once again Camus’. _He is._

_What are your demands? How can he right this?_

_He must stay away from the area of the water, and the human’s memories must be wiped._

This is where Hiro squirms- he thrashes. And Tokiya doesn’t hold on well enough, because he’s surprised by the movement. 

Hiro tries to attack. He misses. It wasn’t even close, but it gets bad reactions from everyone in the circle. Tokiya knew that Hiro’s appearance had changed, but he wasn’t able to get a good look at it. 

Camus, however, he does. 

Camus’ fins are spread out, wide, making him seem bigger than he is. In no more than a blink his nails are longer, shaped into claws- and Tokiya isn’t sure if it’s only his nails or if his fingers themselves have changed with them. Camus’ eyes glow in the worst kind of dark, intimidating blue and when his mouth curls back into a snarl, his mouth is full of needle-like, razor sharp teeth. It feels as if there’s an _aura_ surrounding Camus that gives Tokiya a chill.

Tokiya catches Hiro, to pull him back closer before he’d try to lunge again. He’s sure the way he’s holding Hiro is uncomfortable at best and painful at worse, but Tokiya isn’t willing to let him get away again. His tail is less of a comfort and more of a lock. Tokiya’s eyes glance around the circle, and many of the mermaids, especially the ones in front, look the same as Camus. 

But what makes Tokiya freeze is a few… _familiar_ faces. He’d know the faces of his own children anywhere. But there’s no sympathy on their faces. They aren’t on the attack, but they don’t care what fate befalls their brother. 

Or, Tokiya learns, their father.

The only thing that Tokiya can do when Camus lunges is to turn himself. To block Hiro. 

Teeth sink into Tokiya’s shoulder, and nails tear at Tokiya’s back. 

_Dad!_ Hiro’s tone is hard for Tokiya to hear. It’s both in Tokiya’s head and a silent scream in the water. There’s so much anger- there’s fear. Guilt is one of the heaviest. Hiro wiggles, but Tokiya’s grip is only tighter in his pain. 

Camus was only the first. They were deemed traitors. There were no words in Tokiya’s head, but there was a loud _screech_ , amplified by nearly everyone in the circle that makes it hard for Tokiya to even think. There are nails tearing at his skin, aiming and ripping at the sensitive parts of his tail, biting into wherever they can reach. He feels his necklace tore off of his neck but the only thing that he can focus on is keeping his son safe. 

He can feel how hard Hiro’s tail is pushing underneath them, trying to pull Tokiya’s dead weight. The water all around Tokiya is red, and he leaves a trail behind him. His tail is limp, and his arms are the only thing still holding onto his son. They don’t chase them- why would they?

Tokiya looks dead. 

He must be near death. 

Tokiya can feel Hiro crying underneath him. He can see the bubbles raising through the water from the air that Hiro is expelling. Whatever is still in his lungs. Tokiya reaches up, when they’re far enough to not be chased. He sets his hand on Hiro’s cheek, and it only twists Hiro’s face further. 

He was nearly identical to Ranmaru. Tokiya’s thumb strokes over his cheek. 

_You’re safe?_

It’s such a tired thought. Tokiya can’t handle much more- but it’s the only thought in his head right now. It’s still ringing from the screaming and fuzzy from the pain. 

Hiro has to stop pulling Tokiya, hugging him and crying into his shoulder. Tokiya somehow manages to hold him back. Hiro’s touch hurts. 

_I need to find dad._

Tokiya isn’t sure if Hiro means to share that thought, but it gets Hiro swimming again. Tokiya wants to help, but all he can do is move his tail uselessly below him. 

Hiro has a much harder time pulling Tokiya up onto the sand, but his voice is almost hysterical when he gets Tokiya just above the water and the cove is empty. 

“This is my fault!” Hiro has already let Tokiya go, laying him in the sand. He lifts his tail and he buries his face in it. His sobs are pained and hysterical. Tokiya is reminded that while Hiro may look and act like Ranmaru- he’s a _child_. 

Just because they could take care of themselves doesn’t mean that they should. It’s such a tired thought. Tokiya lifts his arm, barely managing to run his fingers through the bottom of Hiro’s hair. 

“C’mere.” Tokiya mumbles hoarsely. Hiro hesitates, but when Tokiya manages to set his hand on Hiro’s shoulder and gently press down, Hiro finally goes. He curls into Tokiya’s side, the way he had when he was younger, and Tokiya just wraps his arm over Hiro’s shoulders. 

His arm was disgusting. It was covered in bites, and scratches- and blood more than anything. The water hadn’t washed it off because he was still bleeding. 

“You’re hurt because of me.” Hiro sobs. “I couldn’t help you.”

“Ssh, baby, it’s okay.” Tokiya is only now being hit with the added fear of the empty cove. Surely they wouldn’t hurt Ranmaru? He should have told Ranmaru where he was going. His chest constricts painfully when he realizes that his necklace was gone, and his bracelet was barely hanging on. “It’s not your fault.” It hurts to talk. It hurts to breathe- it would be better to be underwater right now, but he couldn’t move himself and Hiro had so much trouble moving him here. And, of course, Hiro couldn’t know- and he doesn’t want to make Hiro panic more, thinking he’s done the wrong thing. “It’s not your fault. I love you.” 

Hiro wails. His tail wraps over Tokiya’s, and that hurts, too, but Tokiya doesn’t care. Tokiya manages to reach his other arm over and to clutch onto his son. 

“You’re okay.” Tokiya’s voice breaks. “That’s all that matters. You’re safe.”

Tokiya isn’t sure how long he’s lying there in immense pain before he starts to see movement in the water. 

Ranmaru can’t pull himself together enough, even with Hiro still in the cove, when he pulls himself up from the water, Tokiya’s necklace held tightly in his fist. He tosses it further on the sand, bringing himself up the sand enough to nearly brush Tokiya’s other side, the one Hiro isn’t on. Tokiya manages to turn his head. It’s harder to keep himself together, seeing the panic in Ranmaru’s eyes. 

Ranmaru manages to lift one of his arms enough to cradle Tokiya’s face. Tokiya’s expression is exhausted. 

“I’m sorry, dad.” Hiro chokes out- both men know it’s directed at Ranmaru, even before he continues speaking. “I got him hurt.”

It’s hard for Ranmaru to pull his hand back, but he manages to, and he sets it shortly on Hiro’s head. “Not yer fault.” Ranmaru’s voice is tense, and it’s no more than a grunt. “Doesn’t matter what you did- you didn’t hurt ‘im like this.”

“I didn’t want them near Alex.” Hiro says weakly, his tail drooping over Tokiya’s. “I didn’t mean for this to happen. I was scared they’d hurt him and-” Hiro sobs. Ranmaru sighs, and he leaves his hand on the side of Hiro’s head for another few seconds. 

“I know, kiddo. Are you hurt?” Tokiya can see Ranmaru’s jaw tense. Hiro just shakes his head, just barely. Ranmaru doesn’t bother lowering his hand, instead moving to cup Tokiya’s face again. The way Tokiya had his face curled into Hiro as he protected him had left it mostly untouched- as well as a small strip on the front of his chest. Hiro had a few scratches on his own tail, but nothing near what Tokiya had. “I’ve gotta get somethin’ ‘t help yer wounds.” Ranmaru sounds livid. His entire body is tensed. “I don’t wanna leave you, but I don’t have a choice, Toki. I’ll be right back, okay?”

Tokiya just watches him. Everything in him wants Ranmaru to stay, but he’s holding his composure together because of Hiro. Ranmaru doesn’t necessarily take it as an agreement, but he still manages to pull away from Tokiya. 

“I’ll be right back.” 

Ranmaru’s hand digs into the sand underneath him as he hesitates for another long moment, and then he finally pulls back, disappearing under the water. 

If it weren’t for Hiro, Tokiya would have fallen asleep. Hiro’s stopped crying, but he doesn’t uncurl from Tokiya until Ranmaru comes back up. He’s finally calmed enough to go back to trying to defend Tokiya, but even when he gets off of Tokiya, to try to cover him, he’s shaking. Tokiya manages to reach out, just enough to brush his fingers against Hiro’s wrist. 

Hiro only slumps back down when he sees that it’s Ranmaru. 

“I’m gonna have ‘t pull you under, Toki.” Ranmaru warns. “Moss doesn’t work right when y’put it on outside ‘a the water.” Ranmaru’s eyes find Hiro’s. “I want you ‘t stay right ‘ere. We’re gonna be just under the water.” 

Hiro shifts, clearly not wanting to stay alone- but it would be easier for Ranmaru to defend them both if Hiro were inside of the cave. Hiro pulls his tail up closer to himself. Ranmaru is careful when he lifts Tokiya to pull him under the water. There’s no good place to hold Tokiya, but Ranmaru’s strong enough to _lift_ him, rather than to drag him. Tokiya is limp in his arms, his blinks coming slowly. 

_You were gone._ There’s so much pain in Ranmaru’s thought alone. _I woke up ‘n you were gone. I wish you would’a told me._

There’s a bunch of moss, tucked in a corner to keep it still. Ranmaru lays him down near it. 

Ranmaru’s hands shake, as soon as they pull away from Tokiya. He’s pissed. It’s a given- but Tokiya can see it in his whole body. 

Ranmaru leans forward, to press his lips to Tokiya’s forehead, and he holds it for a very long moment. Tokiya can stay still enough that it hurts just a bit less, no longer needing to breathe. His gills had remained untouched, and filtering water hurt much less. 

_There was still blood trailin’ in the water. ‘S the only reason I even went back ‘t check the cove._

Tokiya knew he was really hurt, but that was a reminder. Tokiya’s eyes manage to catch Ranmaru, and Ranmaru stiffens before Tokiya can even pass his thought. He still does, however. 

_...Am I dying?_

A very pained look crosses over Ranmaru’s face. 

_I’m not gonna let you. But yer not in a good shape._

Tokiya closes his eyes. He wants to sleep, but he can feel Ranmaru’s anxiety rolling off of him in waves as soon as he can’t see him. 

_...Do you think you’re gonna wake up if I let you sleep?_

Tokiya can’t remember ever hearing Ranmaru’s voice sound so… timid. It forces his eyes open. If they weren’t underwater, Tokiya thinks that he might be tearing up. 

_I will. Have to. For you and Hiro. Kiss me?_

Ranmaru’s kiss is so gentle. The only part of Ranmaru’s hand that touches Tokiya’s face are Ranmaru’s fingertips, just barely brushing Tokiya’s cheek. He holds it for a very long moment. 

When Ranmaru pulls back, Tokiya closes his eyes. 

He wasn’t willing to stay awake. He knows that it would make Ranmaru feel better, but the pain was growing unbearable. It’s why, he was sure, Ranmaru wasn’t forcing him to stay awake.

When Tokiya wakes up, he’s still underwater, but he’s on the sloped sands of the cove. The ends of Ranmaru’s tail are lying over a less injured area of Tokiya’s tail. The way Ranmaru is sitting, only his waist down is under the water. Tokiya’s eyes focus on Ranmaru’s face. Ranmaru is watching out over the water- but because Ranmaru isn’t underwater, Tokiya can’t communicate. 

He turns, getting both Ranmaru’s attention and catching sight of Hiro. Hiro is curled up, half underwater and half over it, higher up on the cove. 

Ranmaru leans down, to straighten Tokiya out. Ranmaru moves, to position himself at the entrance of the cove underwater. He’s hovering over Tokiya enough to keep from hurting him, but they can make eye contact. They can communicate. 

Thinking isn’t much easier, but it doesn’t feel impossible. 

Tokiya does notice that his necklace has returned, and it makes him feel better. 

_How bad is it?_

_I woke up._

Ranmaru frowns at the dry thought. 

_That wasn’t what I asked, Toki._

_Of course it hurts. But Hiro is okay._

A look of fear crosses over Tokiya’s expression, but Ranmaru responds before Tokiya can ask anything else. 

_He’s fine. Barely needed anythin’._

_Kiss me?_

Ranmaru gives him a look- they have things they need to talk about, but Ranmaru won’t deny him this. Ranmaru’s kiss is just as soft as it was the last time they had kissed. Tokiya thinks that it was last night, but it was hard to tell how long he was out. 

Ranmaru holds it longer than he would if they were above water, but he pulls away too soon for Tokiya’s liking. 

_Can’t talk ‘t the kid about it without him freakin’ out. He’s… he’s takin’ it hard but I can’t blame ‘im. But I wanna know what happened._

_They’re mad that he’s spending time with a human. I went out last night to search for him… I was worried. He just… stopped showing up. But I found him at the community with everyone around him- they were going to erase the human boy’s memories and Hiro attacked._

Tokiya’s eyes close. Ranmaru gives him a moment, but he finally opens his eyes again because Tokiya can’t communicate without looking at Ranmaru. 

_He didn’t land any hits, but the damage was done. They were trying to attack him but I was blocking him._

Ranmaru’s expression darkens. Ranmaru stays hovering above him, but Ranmaru closes his eyes and presses his forehead to Tokiya’s. Tokiya’s eyes close, too, but he hears Ranmaru’s voice in his head. 

_I know you weren’t lookin’ for trouble, Toki, but you can’t go off by yerself. ‘Specially when I’m asleep. ‘N as soon as yer healed enough I’m gonna start anchorin’ tighter ‘t you. I love you. ‘N we’re gonna go together, soon as you can swim, ‘n get far away from the community. ...I don’t think we’re gettin’ the kid away from his human. ‘N I can’t say I wanna force ‘im, either. But I’ll talk ‘t ‘im. He needs ‘t be more careful._

Tokiya opens his eyes, but he focuses on Ranmaru’s forehead.

_It wasn’t his fault._

_I know it wasn’t, babe. I know fer a fact that he didn’t want you hurt because ‘a his choice- ‘n he didn’t deserve ‘t be hurt because of it, either._

Tokiya’s eyes glance lower, to his chin. As far away from Ranmaru’s eyes as he can get. 

_I’m sorry. You didn’t turn me to get kicked out of your community._

_When I was a guppy I would’a gave a shit. But the older I get the more I’m realizin’ that not everythin’ our kind stands for is right. But one ‘a the things I do agree with is stickin’ with our own. ‘N fer me, that’s **you**. Even if they’d take me back, I’d fuckin’ never. Not when they hurt you. Not when they were about ‘t attack a kid._ Tokiya’s eyes snap to Ranmaru’s, but Ranmaru’s eyes hold Tokiya. His thought sounds relenting. _Our kid. …’S another thing that I’m startin’ ‘t agree with you on. ...I can’t change anythin’ yet- but we’ll settle._ Tokiya can hear the promise. _We can always have another batch. Keep ‘em ‘t ourselves, ‘til they’re really old enough, yeah? ‘S gonna be a handful, but I think we could do it._

Tokiya manages a flickering smile. He thinks he’d actively be in tears if he were just a few feet higher. 

_With you? I’d like that._

_Then that’s exactly what we’ll do. Fer now, though, I’m leavin’ you ‘ere. I think it’ll be better fer you. If you’re submerged._

Tokiya doesn’t nod. He doesn’t feel capable. But something in his expression shows that he understands. 

_I’m gonna be right next ‘t you. You need me ‘t grab you some food?_

_I couldn’t eat._

Ranmaru frowns, but he does give a very short nod of his head. He leans down to kiss Tokiya’s forehead. 

_Get some rest, Toki. ...Think our time ‘ere’s runnin’ pretty short._

_It’s going to hurt to leave._

_I know. I wish we had a choice._

When Tokiya is quiet, Ranmaru lifts himself from the water. For some time, it’s quiet. 

And then, Tokiya can hear Ranmaru and Hiro talking. 

“How ya holdin’ up, kid?” Ranmaru grunts. 

There’s a very long moment of silence. “I’m going to change him. Alex.” His voice trembles. 

“...’S that somethin’ he wants?”

“I don’t think so.” Hiro’s voice breaks. “But I’m worried about what will happen if I don’t.”

“...If you force that kid, there’s no tellin’ how he’ll react.” Ranmaru’s warning is low. “He might not stay. ‘N if he goes ‘n tells on you ‘t the community, they’ll look fer you. It’d break yer dad’s heart, if you pulled somethin’ stupid like killin’ that kid without ‘im wantin’ it.” 

“I want to keep him safe. I don’t want him to hate me.”

“I know. ‘N I know exactly how you feel.” Ranmaru sighs. “Look. …’Fore I turned yer dad, we lived ‘ere. When he was still human. ...Maybe you could figure somethin’ out like that. Not… not out in a cove. Think I nearly killed ‘im, tryin’ ‘t keep ‘im like this. But find somewhere he can live okay ‘n you can follow ‘im in the water. The ocean’s a big place. ‘R find a new place ‘t meet. Do somethin’ that can keep you together but keep ya both outta trouble.” Tokiya can feel Ranmaru’s eyes on him, even though Tokiya’s eyes are closed. “If he likes you, I’d bet he comes around. But you’ve gotta give ‘im a chance ‘t live. ‘T figure out what he wants ‘t do. No point in havin’ ‘im if he’s miserable, Hiro.”

“...If I stay…” Hiro’s voice is quiet. “...I have to choose. Don’t I?”

Ranmaru sighs. “‘Fraid so. ‘Course we’ll take you, if you wanna come with us. But I can’t stay ‘ere. ...The way you feel about that kid is the way I feel about yer dad. ‘N I’m not willin’ ‘t keep ‘im anywhere where he’s in danger. But I’ll take care ‘a him. ‘N as long as you can take care ‘a yerself- who knows. We could run into each other again. Ocean’s not that big.”

“He’s too trusting.” There’s a sad edge to Hiro’s voice. “I want to watch over him.”

“Then stay. We’ve got life partners, y’know. ‘N that kid’s yer partner. I wouldn’t leave ‘im either. Dunno that there’s anythin’ that could’a gotten me away from Toki, when I finally figured out he was mine…” Ranmaru’s voice lowers. “‘N I did leave ‘im. Fer a while. Fuckin’ biggest mistake I made.”

There’s a long moment of silence, and then Ranmaru moves. Tokiya can tell between the shifting of the sand and his tail, pulling away from Tokiya’s. 

“You’re a good kid.” Ranmaru’s voice is gruff. “‘N I can tell you wanna go. But wait fer yer dad ‘t wake up first, alright? Think it’d hurt ‘im, if you just left.”

There is no response- but Hiro doesn’t leave and Tokiya thinks that he nods. 

Tokiya agreed with Ranmaru, as hard as it was. But they couldn’t just kidnap a literal child to take with them- and there was nothing Tokiya wanted less than Hiro to forcibly drown him. But he knew that he wouldn’t be happy without Ranmaru- and he imagined that Hiro must feel the same way about Alex. 

And Ranmaru was right. 

They lived for a very long time. There was a chance that this wouldn’t be a last goodbye. 

But selfishly, to keep his son just a little bit longer, Tokiya continues to try to fall asleep. It doesn’t come easy, but it eventually does. 

When he’s awake, he sets his hand on Ranmaru’s tail. He’s trying to get help to sit up, because as he tries, he’s not doing very well at it- but Ranmaru’s tail actually ends up pressing down, forcing him back down. 

Tokiya taps on his tail, but it’s such a weak pressure that it doesn’t do much. 

Actually, Ranmaru’s pressure does release, and Tokiya figures out it’s because Tokiya’s feeble attempt made Ranmaru worried that he was hurting Tokiya. 

Tokiya reaches out, and Ranmaru finally pulls back his tail, only to go under the water, holding Tokiya down more firmly. 

_You’ve gotta stay down, Toki._

_I heard the both of you talking. If he’s saying goodbye, I want to be sitting up for it._

No thoughts come for a very long moment, and when a thought does come, it’s very slow to form. 

_If I let you get away with this, yer eatin’. I’m gonna catch some fish, ‘n we’ll eat together. But if yer strainin’ yerself, you’ve gotta do somethin’ ‘t remedy it._

_...Okay._

_I’ll help you up now. Just because yer too in the open fer my likin’, layin’ ‘ere. But if you don’t eat, I’ll be puttin’ you back down, babe, ‘n we can all talk under the water._

Ranmaru is very careful when he sits Tokiya up, moving him so that he’s leaning against the wall of the cove. There’s a grim air in the cave- and it’s mostly from Hiro, sitting further in the cave. 

“Watch ‘im, yeah?” Ranmaru grunts, clearly to Hiro. “I’m not gonna leave this clearin’ but I’m gonna get us some food.”

Hiro nods, moving himself further, nearer to Tokiya. Tokiya can see worry in Hiro’s eyes. Fear. Tokiya manages a smile. 

“I still think you’re too young.” Tokiya’s voice is weak, but it’s teasing. Ranmaru has already moved to go catch fish. “...But I think you’re making the right choice for you. I’m going to miss you. But I want you to be happy more than anything, and I think that isn’t going to be possible, if you come with us. ...But I want you to be careful.” Breathing is painful, and sitting is too- and his barely contained laugh when a fish comes jumping from the water to land near Tokiya’s hip also hurts. Tokiya still grabs the fish to hold it. “Be smart. Be careful. Be safe. Take care of yourself, and take care of this boy.”

“I will.” Hiro promises quietly. “I’ll take care of both of us.” Hiro sits up straighter, his hands clenching into fists on his curled tail, his jaw tight. “I wanna take care of Alex like dad takes care of you.”

A well timed fish lands its way next to Tokiya’s hip. Tokiya’s smile comes just a bit easier. “I think that if you use your dad as an example, Alex is going to be one of the safest people on this planet.” 

Hiro gives a bit of a laugh, but he rubs at his eyes with the back of his hand. Tokiya knows Ranmaru is going to be back soon, but that more than likely, he’s waiting just a bit below the water. Letting them have a moment. Tokiya manages to lift an arm, and Hiro gives him a hesitant look. 

“Come here. I’ll be alright.” 

Hiro moves, but he’s careful. Far more careful than the other day. Tokiya still holds him in a one armed hug. 

“I hope you find your happiness, Hiro.”

Tokiya turns his head, pressing a kiss to the side of Hiro’s head. 

Hiro very carefully pulls his tail in, resting his head on Tokiya’s shoulder. 

“You’re barely even a kid anymore.” Tokiya sighs wistfully. “But even if you’re leaving the nest- I’m glad that you’ve stayed around this long. And you’re always going to be our baby. No matter when we see each other again.”

Hiro gives an almost tearful laugh- and this is when Ranmaru chooses to show himself again, holding four fish in his hands. Two each. 

“Oi. Thought you were eatin’ yer fish.”

Tokiya gives an amused sigh, finally letting his arm drop from Hiro’s shoulders as he moves to collect his fish. “It’s rude to eat before everyone else.”

Ranmaru rolls his eyes, but he lets Tokiya have that one. Ranmaru sits across from Tokiya, his tail overlapping Tokiya’s. 

Their last dinner is… normal. Tokiya only eats a fish and half, but Ranmaru seems pleased to see him eat that much- even willing to finish off Tokiya’s last half after quite a few attempts from Tokiya. 

It isn’t until after dinner that the grim air comes back. 

“I think I’m leaving tonight.” Hiro admits quietly. 

“I understand.” Tokiya says softly. “Please be careful.”

“I will be.” Hiro is looking down. “I’ll try to find you. When I can.”

“Just keep yerself safe.” Ranmaru grunts. “‘N I’m sure we’ll run into each other.”

Hiro nods. Ranmaru pulls back his tail, so that Tokiya doesn’t have to move. Hiro manages a smile at Tokiya and Ranmaru, and Tokiya manages one back. Ranmaru ruffles Hiro’s hair as he makes his way out of the cave.

Tokiya cries, when Hiro is gone. Ranmaru lets him stay above water for a few minutes as he carefully holds onto Tokiya, pressing kisses to the side of his head. When Tokiya finally calms down, Ranmaru pulls him back under the water, linking the very end of their tails. 

Tokiya can’t swim- and even if he could, Ranmaru wouldn’t let Tokiya check Hiro’s beach. Their old beach. 

Because Tokiya knew that Ranmaru loved Hiro- but he also knew that Ranmaru wouldn’t let Tokiya put himself in danger. Especially not after what had just happened.

Ranmaru catches fish for Tokiya and feeds him over the next few days- and he doesn’t leave Tokiya’s side. 

And he’s glad he doesn’t. Because Ranmaru manages to catch sight of the mermaid, clearly from the community, scouting out their cove. At first, Ranmaru’s aggression startles Tokiya, but then he pales. When Tokiya tries to look, to find what Ranmaru’s looking at, Ranmaru tries to keep Tokiya from looking- but when Tokiya catches sight of the mermaid, one that looks a little too much like himself- he thinks even Ranmaru can hear Tokiya’s heart break. The mermaid flees, but even with it being their daughter, Ranmaru can’t take the risk. 

“We have to leave.” Ranmaru says grimly. He had pulled Tokiya up, just a bit up the cove. He’s holding onto Tokiya tightly. 

“But-” Tokiya’s voice gets choked in his throat. 

“...She’s a part ‘a the community, babe. ‘S not safe. ‘M sorry.”

Tokiya’s next sob comes out, brutal enough to make his entire body ache. “I still can’t swim.”

“I’ll just have to carry you.” Ranmaru sighs. “But I’m not gonna sit here ‘n wait ‘t see if someone comes by ‘t try to attack you. ‘R heaven forbid they send a group.”

Tokiya lets his head fall against Ranmaru’s shoulder. “Please tell me that this is it.” Tokiya’s voice is pleading. “That if we leave, things will be easier.”

“They will be.” Ranmaru promises. “It’ll be just us, yeah? ‘N that’s always worked before.” 

Tokiya is quiet, but his chest constricts painfully when Ranmaru lifts him, sliding them both further into the water. Tokiya can’t even wrap his tail around Ranmaru as Ranmaru leads them out.

Tokiya doesn’t know where Ranmaru is taking them, but he doesn’t think that Ranmaru knows either. They just… leave. In the direction furthest from where the community was, and they swim for quite a while. Tokiya falls asleep, more than once, during their journey, and he only fully wakes up when they breach the water. He moves his arms to hold onto Ranmaru- though he’s more sleepy than alarmed. 

This cove was wide, and there was no sand that wasn’t under water, though the water in the back was only a few inches deep. It was dark, and warm, and Tokiya can’t see into the end of it when they’re at the entrance. 

It was a good hiding spot. And it was private. 

That was Tokiya’s favorite part. 

“Think I found us a good replacement spot, babe.” Ranmaru mumbles. “But you can go back ‘t sleep.”

“Should I?” Tokiya’s voice is definitely sleepy, and despite his question, he’s nuzzling into Ranmaru’s shoulder. “I’ve been sleeping a lot.”

“Yer still hurt. You need it. But if you really wanna be up, I’m gonna make you eat.”

“I’ll sleep.” Tokiya decides, holding onto Ranmaru tighter. Ranmaru gives an exasperated snort. 

“‘Course you will.” 

Ranmaru pulls Tokiya further into the cove, taking enough time to make sure that it’s safe before he settles with Tokiya, digging them into the soft sand to keep them still. Tokiya still wasn’t well enough for Ranmaru to properly anchor their tails together. 

Tokiya hadn’t realized just how tired _Ranmaru_ was until Ranmaru was out, almost as soon as his eyes closed. Tokiya wondered if Ranmaru knew they’d be safe, or if he was just hoping, too tired to stop himself from sleeping. It actually keeps Tokiya awake. He couldn’t do much to protect them, but he could at least keep an eye out. He isn’t sure how long that Ranmaru is asleep but Tokiya notices him twitching. Ranmaru and Tokiya were close, but they weren’t touching- so Tokiya got a better look at the way Ranmaru’s fingers were curling, and his tail was flicking, and the way his eyebrows drew in and up, and his mouth flickered down. A nightmare. 

Tokiya turns to his side. It’s not easy, but his focus is on Ranmaru. He reaches out carefully, to put his palm on Ranmaru’s cheek. Ranmaru makes a soft noise in his sleep- one of fear, and Tokiya moves closer. He ignores himself to press close to Ranmaru’s chest, and to curl his tail around Ranmaru. Tokiya was usually asleep when Ranmaru was- and he knew that Ranmaru didn’t often have nightmares when they were linked together, but he wasn’t sure if this was a rare one, or if they had grown more common while Tokiya was asleep, too far away. 

Ranmaru’s hands find Tokiya to pull him closer in his sleep, and Tokiya ignores the pain from the action. He was going to be sore tomorrow, but he’d do anything to get the look of fear off of Ranmaru’s face. It hurt to see. 

“Toki?” Ranmaru’s voice is groggy and hoarse. 

“It’s okay.” Tokiya brushes his nose against Ranmaru’s collarbone. “I’m here. We’re both safe.” Tokiya’s tail winds just a bit closer to Ranmaru’s. He feels Ranmaru’s tail twitch, wanting to link his own but realizing just before he does that Tokiya is still _hurt_. Tokiya talks before Ranmaru can try to get Tokiya away from him. “You were having a bad dream.” Tokiya’s fingertips trail over Ranmaru’s side. “I was worried.”

Ranmaru sighs. “I would’a been fine. ‘S just a dream.”

“And if I were having a nightmare?” Tokiya asks quietly. “If our positions were exactly reversed?”

Ranmaru’s silence is enough of an answer. He finally sighs. “Just don’t push yerself.”

“I’m not. But I’m staying like this tonight.”

Tokiya is kept, resting in the cave, for quite some time. Ranmaru catches fish for him, and he finds a patch of moss that isn’t far enough to make him feel like he’s leaving Tokiya alone, and he starts changing Tokiya’s bandages more actively than he had been able to previously. 

Eventually, Tokiya is able to actually leave the cave. They still go back to sleep, and Ranmaru still catches Tokiya’s fish for him because Tokiya is far slower than he had been and it frustrates him when he has to struggle through trying to catch a fish. They explore, though with Tokiya it’s a slower process. He’s glad that Ranmaru has a good sense of direction, because they would never have found the cave again without him- and while Tokiya preferred the cove, the cave is an alright alternative. 

And then, months in, when Tokiya’s wounds are all just scars and his swimming is just a bit more steady, and more than anything they both feel _safe_ having seen no mermaids nor signs of them anywhere near them- Tokiya cuddles up to Ranmaru, twirling his tail tighter around Ranmaru’s than he normally does. 

“Ran-” Tokiya’s hands slide over Ranmaru’s shoulders, holding onto him tightly. “Do you think it’s too soon to try again? For… for kids. I mean.”

Ranmaru’s expression softens as he holds onto Tokiya’s waist and kisses his forehead. “If you’re ready, babe, then we can try.”

“And we get to keep these ones?” Tokiya’s voice breaks. “I don’t… I don’t want them to leave. Not so soon.”

Ranmaru holds him tightly. “Don’t think they’d have too much of a choice anyways.” He admits. “We’re all they’re gonna have.”

“I don’t regret what I did.” Tokiya says, his tone quiet and grim. “I couldn’t let them hurt Hiro.”

“I know.” Ranmaru sighs, rubbing Tokiya’s back. 

“...But I made your choice to leave for you.” Tokiya says quietly, shrinking in on himself. “Didn’t I?”

“Babe, you could’a gotten yerself kicked out for any fucking reason there is ‘n I would’a followed you. My choice was you before I even had ‘t make it.”

Tokiya still remains small, but now he’s leaning into Ranmaru instead of away. 

“I’m a mess, too, you know.” Tokiya mumbles softly. “Covered in scars.”

“I won’t say it doesn’t matter. Because you were hurt ‘n that part does- but that’s the only reason I even notice all the marks. We’re life partners, Toki. You know I don’t take that lightly.” Ranmaru turns, pulling Tokiya with him so that he can hover over Tokiya. “But if yer that worried about it-” Ranmaru leans down to press his lips to Tokiya’s. When he pulls back, it’s not very far. “I can show you exactly what I think about you.”

Tokiya’s hands find Ranmaru’s shoulders, holding Ranmaru closer to pull him into another kiss. 

This time around, it takes more than one try. It isn’t until nearly two months into them trying until they wake up, the eggs cradled between them. This time, there are only seven. He knew, for a fact, that Ranmaru really didn’t mind often going further than they usually did (and Tokiya didn’t mind much, either) but Tokiya is still overjoyed, waking up to see the eggs. 

When Tokiya tries to unwind his tail from Ranmaru’s, Ranmaru’s tail simply follows Tokiya’s, keeping them combined as Ranmaru wakes himself up. 

“‘N where ‘r you goin’?” Ranmaru grumbles. 

“Ran, look.” Tokiya’s voice is excited. It’s enough to wake Ranmaru up but to not panic him, opening one eye to look at Tokiya’s face first before following Tokiya’s gaze, to the eggs in between them. 

“We should get ‘em buried.” Ranmaru’s tail finally unwinds from Tokiya’s, to let Tokiya sit up. “We’ll still keep a close eye on ‘em, Toki, but they’re safer ‘ere. No killin’ yerself watchin’ over them.”

Tokiya is already beginning to dig a hole in the sand. “I’ll… try… to be better this time. It’s difficult, not hovering over them.”

“I know, babe. But we’re real hidden now.” Ranmaru sits up, moving down enough to help Tokiya place the last of the eggs into the hole and brush the sand back over it, pressing an indent into the sand. “They’ll be safe. But fer now-” Ranmaru presses a kiss to Tokiya’s forehead. “I know yer still excited, but we should go back ‘t sleep.”

Tokiya glances outside of the cave, but it’s still dark- and it’s clearly not nearing morning yet. Tokiya sighs, but he nods and lets Ranmaru pull him back up the cove. As the weeks progress, Tokiya does get just a little bit better, but it’s still hard for him. 

“What?” Ranmaru had approached Tokiya during a time that he had insisted on curling himself up around the eggs. “You’ve got a face on.”

“Are… are these our last ones?” Tokiya’s face is quickly reddening. “I know we haven’t even raised them yet, but-”

Ranmaru sighs, but he settles near Tokiya to pet through his hair. “If we raise ‘em ‘n you start missin’ havin’ guppies, Toki… we live fer a long fuckin’ time. Most normal couples have about five or six batches, at least. ‘N if we’re watchin’ ‘em ‘til they’re grown, we’ll probably have less but-”

“We’ll still have at least one more.” Tokiya mumbles. 

“At least. Probably still two ‘r three, babe, if that’s what you wanna do.”

Tokiya smiles, and he moves, to lay his head on Ranmaru’s lap. “I’m glad. I liked raising them with you.” Tokiya can’t narrow his eyes fast enough when he noticed Ranmaru’s expression change into a smirk. 

“‘N I liked havin’ ‘em with you.” 

“Oh my God, Ran.” 

Ranmaru laughs, and he pets through Tokiya’s hair, but his voice then softens. “I never minded kids. I dunno. I figured I’d have ‘em, but I didn’t really think it’d be anythin’ more than… what it was? Raisin’ ‘em, lettin’ ‘em off ‘n doin’ it again. When I met ‘n bonded with you, I guess I didn’t really think that I’d have kids after that but… Maybe it was seein’ you with our kids last time, but I liked it. ‘N if you want ‘t raise ‘em ‘til they’re adults, I’d do it. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t want to. But I’d do it for you.”

“You… you say you’d do it for me but-”

“I want to.” Ranmaru assures. “Trust me, if I didn’t want to, you’d know.”

Tokiya gives a soft, amused noise. Their conversation filters out, but Tokiya keeps his head on Ranmaru’s lap until he ends up falling asleep. 

When the eggs hatch, Tokiya sits himself in front of them- with the idea to be fair and switch places. But Ranmaru watches Tokiya’s face and raises an eyebrow. “If you wanna watch ‘em, babe, I don’t mind.”

“You let me last time.”

Ranmaru can’t help but chuckle. “Considerin’ you said I _let you_ , I think you should do it again. ‘Course I wouldn’t mind watchin’ ‘em, but I don’t think I like it the way you do.”

“Are… are you sure?” 

Ranmaru can’t help but smile at Tokiya’s hesitation, amused. “I’ve got the eggs.” 

Tokiya does go to sit on the other side of the eggs, so that he can keep the squirming guppies between him and the wall of the cave. Ranmaru takes the first egg, cracking it open with his knuckle.

It’s a smooth process. Ranmaru gets the guppies out of the egg and he passes them to Tokiya. 

Tokiya has four of them, curled up on his chest, and two splashing in the pond next to them. The last one has pulled its way onto Tokiya’s face, her tail hitting Tokiya’s shoulder as it moves. 

“We’ve got a clingy group.” Ranmaru grins. 

Tokiya glances down, because one of the two that _hadn’t_ been clingier had seen the others, resting on Tokiya, and has moved closer to Tokiya’s tail. Tokiya has had a smile on his face the entire time, a small, soft smile- even with the one that’s still resting on his face, grabbing at his nose and cheeks with her small hand. Ranmaru moves the shells off of his lap and moves over besides Tokiya, helping by taking the girl off of his face. She makes a short, displeased cry, making grabby hands towards Tokiya’s face, and Tokiya laughs, his eyes closing with the bright sound. 

“It’s alright.” His voice is heavily amused. “She worked hard to get there.”

Ranmaru laughs at that, but he rolls his eyes, though he carefully settles the girl back against Tokiya’s cheek. 

Tokiya does feel better when one of the guppies curled on his chest decides that they want to go to Ranmaru- crawling themselves over. Because while Ranmaru hadn’t seemed upset, that the guppies were all paying attention to Tokiya, he does still seem happy to get some attention from the boy that had made his way over, too. And the second girl of their mostly boy group, the one that had been getting jealous of the others, has climbed onto Tokiya’s tail, but after seeing Ranmaru decides that she wants to be there, too.

Ranmaru waits until most of the guppies have fallen asleep, the one on Tokiya’s face included, before Ranmaru finally lifts her off of Tokiya’s cheek and lays her down against Tokiya’s chest, in the empty spot the other boy had left. 

“They’re cute.” Tokiya says fondly, an undeniable happiness in his voice. “And six out of seven of them being so fond of us…”

“‘M sure the last one won’t mind stayin’.” Ranmaru assures. “He’ll just be a ‘lil more independent ‘s all.”

“I know we’re already parents- but it’s… exciting. It hasn’t been that long since our kids have been with us..”

“I know what you mean.” Ranmaru smiles, his eyes on Tokiya’s chest, where four of them are still all curled up, two of them, twins, curled up with each other, and Ranmaru’s smile is one of the softest Tokiya has seen. 

Tokiya lets his head fall onto Ranmaru’s shoulder. It takes a long moment before he finally does get a bit more serious, sighing. “We’re going to have to figure out what to do after this, Ran.”

“What d’ya mean?”

“...We can’t go back to the community but… I don’t know that it’s right, to keep them with us _forever_. Or to send them off, completely alone and with no one but us…”

Ranmaru sighs. “We’ll figure somethin’ out.” Ranmaru promises. “But it’ll be fine to keep them with just us ‘til we’re ready ‘t let ‘em outta the next.” Ranmaru’s voice had already been serious, but it gets much more so as he begins to speak cautiously, his eyes trailing to the one boy, separate from the others. “...How’re you gonna handle it, if he doesn’t wanna stay?”

“...I don’t really have a choice but to just handle it.” Tokiya says grimly. “Because as much as I hate to say it- human children need their parents. But they… they aren’t going to need us, and it isn’t going to take very long for that. I’m not going to refuse to teach him things he needs to learn and I’m not going to forcibly make him stay- all I can do is care for him and hope he wants to, Ran.”

Time feels like it moves far too fast, when it’s already time to teach them to swim. 

_I wonder._ Tokiya is watching most of the kids try to flail around, keeping themselves just above the floor, looking at Ranmaru only long enough to communicate. _If we’ll have another one like Hiro._

_Huh?_

Tokiya can’t stop the amused smile. _One that tries to take after you._

 _Sounds like you want that._ Ranmaru sounds teasing. 

_It was awfully cute. And there could be worse people to model themselves after._

Ranmaru playfully rolls his eyes. 

The one boy, that they had named Hari, that had always been more distant had only gotten worse, the older he got and the more he learned. Ranmaru often had to bring him back to the group, when he learned to swim and tried to swim away. 

Soon, they wouldn’t stop him- as much as the thought hurt Tokiya. But Tokiya and Ranmaru wouldn’t let him leave until he knew how to feed himself- until he learned to anchor and swim faster than he could now. 

Tokiya wasn’t sure how to handle it, when one of Hari’s siblings had tried to stop Hari from swimming too far from the group and Hari had _hit_ her. Even soundless, Tokiya knew she was crying before he had even seen her cry. 

_I’ve got ‘em._

Ranmaru reacts before Tokiya can even think to, and it’s easy to catch up to them. When Ranmaru brings them back, he’s leading Hari with a hand on the back of his neck, but he has the girl, Misa, cradled in his other arm. She’s still crying. Tokiya reaches out and Ranmaru passes Misa to him so that Tokiya can comfort her. Tokiya holds her tightly. 

Tokiya can’t hear what Ranmaru is telling Hari, but Ranmaru’s expression is stern and Hari’s expression stays angry. 

That isn’t the only violence that Hari has shown, though it’s usually towards Ranmaru. It was when Hari had bitten Ranmaru hard enough to leave a long lasting mark that they had finally had a serious discussion about his behavior. After they had gotten the guppies to sleep they had gone to the mouth of the cave to discuss it just below the water. Tokiya starts.

_I don’t know what to do, Ran. What if he seriously hurts one of the others?_

_I dunno, either, Toki._ An almost hesitant expression crosses Ranmaru’s face. 

_...What aren’t you telling me?_

_It’s not totally uncommon fer a guppy ‘t be aggressive._

_What do your kind do when that happens?_

_Kill them._ It’s a grim thought. _It’s common knowledge that you can’t change the way they act when they’re that bad._

Tokiya’s face is horrified. _Ran, we can’t._

_I don’t wanna do that, either, Toki, but we need ‘t figure out somethin’. Because there’ve been too many close calls._

Tokiya’s eyes flicker down to the bite mark. It was nasty. If that hadn’t been Ran, and had been another kid…

_What can we do? That doesn’t involve killing him. It’s not his fault he’s so…_

_Aggressive._ Ranmaru’s shoulders lower with a silent sigh. _I could try ‘t teach ‘im ‘t fish early. I’d like ‘t teach ‘im ‘t be more steady in his swimmin’ but I think that teachin’ ‘im ‘t hunt ‘n then lettin’ ‘im back around the other kids…_ Tokiya nods, a pained expression on his face. _I think we’ve gotta let ‘im go, babe. I’ll spend tomorrow teachin’ ‘im everythin’ I can, ‘n make sure he’s got the best ‘a what I can give ‘im ‘n…_

 _Let him go._ It’s a soft, sad thought. Ranmaru pulls Tokiya closer by the arm, wrapping his arms around him. 

_I’m sorry, babe. But we don’t ‘ave a choice ‘ere. ...I know this isn’t what you wanna hear, but he could kill one ‘a the others, when he gets a ‘lil bigger._

_I know._ It feels almost like an echo. _I don’t want any of them hurt._

_Then this is the best we can do._

The rest of the guppies are confused the next day, when Hari and Ranmaru aren’t with them for their usual swimming time, but Tokiya only gets questions about Ranmaru. They’ve bonded with each other, especially the twin boys Yuki and Yuuya, but none of them had ever really gotten along with Hari. As much as it pains him, Tokiya can’t blame any of them. Tokiya and Ranmaru often had to pull Hari away when he’d get angry or he’d bully the others. 

But after insisting that Ranmaru was fine and would be back later, the guppies were happy enough to spend time practicing their swimming. They were getting much better at it. 

Tokiya hadn’t felt right all day. He hadn’t even gotten to give Hari a proper goodbye- and while Tokiya had tried, Hari had made it clear that he didn’t want Tokiya near him. It hurt, but Tokiya hadn’t gotten nearer. 

That night, Ranmaru returns with an armful of fish and no Hari. 

Tokiya skips dinner that night, curled at the mouth of the cave, crying. 

Because no matter what- Hari _was_ his son. And while he would much rather have sent Hari off early than to _kill_ him, it broke his heart, in the same way it hurt him when his other children had left. Tokiya’s only left alone for a few moments- because Ranmaru comes over to sit with him, and then not long after Tokiya has a circle around him, the rest of the guppies lying on and around him, trying to comfort him, too. Tokiya gives a tearful laugh, wrapping his arms around the children he could reach. 

Ranmaru has to convince Tokiya to let him teach them to hunt when the time comes. Tokiya is terrified that more of them will decide that they want to leave when they can- and they’re all much, much better swimmers. 

“It’s gonna be fine.” Ranmaru says softly. At this point, they’re sleeping alone, together, closer to the mouth of the cave. The guppies sleep in a group in the more shallow water towards the back, learning to anchor themselves to each other. The twins had been the first to learn. 

“We never encouraged any of the others to leave.” Tokiya’s voice breaks. “But they left, anyways.”

“Toki. ‘M not gonna say that our first batch ‘a kids _didn’t_ love you, but all of the guppies behind us _adore_ you. I dunno that even askin’ ‘em ‘t leave would work right now.”

“I think you’re a little dramatic about that.” Tokiya gives a weak smile. “But I hope you’re right that they won’t leave.”

“You could tell ‘em, too.” 

“What?”

“Give it to ‘em straight. I know they’re little, but they’re nearin’ the age where they go off themselves, so obviously they’re smart enough ‘t understand. Just tell ‘em that they’re nearin’ the age that they _can_ leave- but that they’re more ‘n welcome ‘t stay ‘n that you hope they do.”

“I just worry that might put the idea in their heads.” Tokiya admits. 

“It probably already is.” Ranmaru sighs. “It’s pretty ingrained in us.”

“I’ll… think it over.”

The kids learn how to hunt quickly. They’ve gotten good enough at swimming that it isn’t very hard for them to catch up with the fish. Tokiya had been worried about it- but he found himself smiling when the kids would catch a fish and go to show it off to Tokiya. By the end of the day, Tokiya was struggling to carry the fish, but they wouldn’t let Ranmaru carry them- because the fish were _for_ Tokiya. Tokiya had to navigate carefully when explaining that he couldn’t physically eat twenty fish by himself, but in the end he managed to get the guppies to let him pass them around for dinner.

They all claimed that the fish Tokiya had chosen had been caught by _them_ \- and then Ranmaru looked at them, grinning, and had claimed that _he_ had caught the fish Tokiya was eating (despite having caught exactly zero fish that day), but Tokiya had started laughing when there was a noisy burst of argument against Ranmaru, too. 

When they’ve finished eating, Tokiya’s silence changes. His eyes meet Ranmaru’s, but he notices a few of the guppies eyeing him curiously. 

“Just so all of you know-” Tokiya’s voice is soft. “When you’re better at hunting, and you’re comfortable with swimming… it is each of your individual choices if you’d… like to leave us or not. You’re free to leave on your own when you’re safe to do so, if that’s what you’d like to do. Ran… Your dad and I… We would like you to stay. We’d like you to stay with us for a much, much longer time, but it isn’t right to not let you know that you can leave when you’re safe to.”

Ranmaru nods, when Tokiya is done speaking.

Yuki, one of the twins, is the first to speak up- which was a bit surprising. He was the quieter of the two. “Is that what happened to Hari?”

“He… He left a bit earlier than he should have.” Tokiya closes his eyes, focusing on keeping his voice steady. “But… yes. It was in his best interest… it was his choice to leave.”

“Would we make you that sad? If we left?” Another boy, though a louder one, Yato asks. He asks it very bluntly- very straightforwardly. Something he clearly got from his father.

Tokiya gets quiet, not wanting to answer, but Ranmaru speaks up for him. “He always gets sad. Yer our guppies, yeah?” Ranmaru’s voice is grim. “‘Course, if ya really wanna leave, we’re gonna support you. ‘N I’m always gonna be ‘ere for ‘im, so think ‘a yerself first. But we won’t lie ‘t you, either.”

The kids glance at each other, but it’s hard to tell what any of them are thinking. 

“Even if you stay-” Tokiya tries to make his voice light hearted. “We’re certainly not trying to hold you forever. I… I wasn’t always a mermaid. Where I came from, where I used to live, they raised their children until they were adults, and then those children found their own lives. Of course, their parents usually didn’t… _disappear_ \- they were still there for they children they were just… support, rather than full care-takers. I’ve come to understand that things are very different for guppies. And that’s why I would love to care for all of you longer, but I would never hold you, if you feel that your best option is to leave.”

It was a very adult conversation to have with very young children- but none of them seem to be confused by what Tokiya is telling them, beyond learning that Tokiya _isn’t_ a natural mermaid. 

“I don’t want to leave.” Misa speaks up. Several others nod their heads. Tokiya’s expression softens. It’s Yuuya that heads forward first, pulling Yuki by the wrist, and they’re the first to hug Tokiya, though the other kids are all quick to move forward, dog-piling Tokiya. Tokiya gives a happy laugh, wrapping his arms around them, and a glance at Ranmaru’s face shows that he’s smiling too. 

It takes some time before any of them leave- though three of them do leave a few years earlier than Tokiya would have liked them to- but while that night had been worse, because he had lost all three of them that day, he had gotten to give them all a proper goodbye with a kiss on a forehead and a wish for them to be safe, but he had also gotten the relief of seeing all three of them go off _together_. He could only hope that they stuck together. 

Ranmaru had stuck close to him that day, and the twins had been the one to get dinner for them, though Tokiya couldn’t eat. Misa had been the third to stay. 

And those three had stayed a year or two longer than Tokiya had hoped- and the twins a year after that. 

The twins both reminded Tokiya of Hiro. There was a lot in Yuuya that reminded Tokiya of himself, but Yuki had turned into a mini Ranmaru, though they both highly resembled Tokiya. 

They were very slow to leave, but Tokiya had kissed them both on the forehead and had given them a smile- trying to do his best to keep any signs of sadness out of his expression. It was hard to tell exactly how long they lived, because while Yuki and Yuuya were now clearly adults, Ranmaru looked exactly the same as he had the day he had reappeared on the beach all those years back. On any shiny items Tokiya saw himself in, he thinks he looks the same, too.

He understands, how couples can have so many batches of children- their time line was ridiculous. 

This night was the night he cried the hardest. Ranmaru just stayed in the cave and held him. 

“They promised they’d come back, babe. ‘N Misa still visits every once in a while.”

“They all have.” Tokiya says, though his voice is still a bit miserable. “But it’s still…”

“Hard.” Ranmaru sighs. “I know.”

“...I both want to never have any more guppies, and want to try for another batch right now.” Tokiya sighs, letting his head rest against Ranmaru’s shoulder. 

“Think it might be just a ‘lil too soon ‘t have another batch _right now_ -” Ranmaru pulls Tokiya onto his lap. Tokiya’s tail flick up in a bit of surprise, but he settles easily. “Because it’s real nice ‘t have kids around, but I haven’t gotten my hands on you in _years_ Toki.”

“While I’d like to say that you’re being dramatic-” Tokiya turns his upper body, to press himself closer to Ranmaru. “...I don’t think you are this time.” Tokiya sighs. “God, I miss touching you.”

“Well I’m callin’ dibs on you first.” Ranmaru smirks, brushing his nose against Tokiya, but then his smirk dies down some. “But as much as I’d love to- I won’t until you’re feelin’ a bit better.”

“It’s always going to be hard, Ran- and I understand exactly why you’re worried now, but I truly, genuinely think that being intimate would help me feel better. I’m not using it as an excuse to push my feelings off.” Tokiya presses his lips softly to Ranmaru’s, pulling back only a bit to mumble. “I promise.”

Ranmaru’s eyes search Tokiya’s face, and then he nods, seemingly satisfied by what he sees in Tokiya’s expression. “If you change your mind, stop me.” 

And with that, Ranmaru moves again to press his lips to Tokiya, flipping him over so that he’s on his back on the sand. “It’s been too long.” Tokiya gives a happy sigh when Ranmaru is over him. “...Maybe we do deserve a break.”

“Raisin’ kids is fuckin’ exhaustin’.” Ranmaru chuckles. “Won’t say it wasn’t worth it. _But now_ \- we get ‘t focus on us.” Ranmaru gives Tokiya a wild grin, and Tokiya can’t even muster up a response (verbal or physical) before Ranmaru’s lips are on Tokiya’s neck.

That day it had taken much longer than usual- but Tokiya wasn’t complaining. Nor were either of them complaining when Tokiya had switched it up the next day. It had certainly been a while. 

Without the kids, they had begun to explore further away from the cave. 

_Are you sure about going this far?_ Tokiya’s thought is very uncertain. _I’m entirely lost._

 _Toki, if you wanted ‘t go back ‘t our old cove, I could bring you there._ Ranmaru reassures. _I know **exactly** where our cave is._

_Is that a natural mermaid thing?_

_Kinda. All ‘a us ‘ave it a ‘lil bit, in the same way that I’m sure most ‘a yer kind know certain pathways, yeah? Like how you found yer home when you left. I’ve just got a better gift with it than most._

_Do you think a few of our children have it, too?_

_Probably. Bet it passed down ‘t at least a couple of ‘em._

Surprisingly, it’s Tokiya that spots the movement first- and it’s very clearly a mermaid. Tokiya rears back, grabbing onto Ren’s arm as he does to stop him. 

_There. To our right._

Ranmaru stills, but Tokiya sees his eyes travel to where Tokiya pointed out. When he sees what Tokiya has, he pushes Tokiya behind him. Tokiya holds onto Ranmaru’s shoulders, mostly hidden behind him, peering over his shoulder. 

_There’s two._ Tokiya informs Ranmaru. He can only see their tails, both a purple similar to his own, but they’re close enough together that it was hard to catch them both. 

And then, Tokiya shoots away from Ranmaru fast enough to startle him, managing to slip away for that reason alone- because Tokiya had seen their faces. _Yuki! Yuu!_ Tokiya had learned quickly that they both had a special gift- it sometimes backfired, because there was no telling only one twin something, because they both heard it. They stand at alarm for a second when they see Tokiya nearing them, but they relax when they realize. When Tokiya sees their expressions calm, he pulls them both into a hug. Ranmaru is behind him already, having chased him the moment that Tokiya had taken off. 

_Don’t do that._ Ranmaru scolds Tokiya. _Y’gave me a heart attack._

Tokiya would apologize, but he can’t look at Ranmaru with the way his arms are wrapped around his boys. 

_I’m so glad to see you._ Tokiya squeezes them tightly. It had been at least a year since they had left. They hadn’t yet been back to visit, but it wasn’t that surprising. Time passed strangely when you had so much of it. Tokiya finally pulls away from them, and while Ranmaru frowns at him, it seems like that’s all he can manage because it’s clear that Tokiya’s _very_ happy. 

_How have you two been?_ Tokiya looks between them, though he’s back far enough now to hold onto Ranmaru’s arm. 

_We found other mermaids._ It’s Yuuya that speaks.

Tokiya’s eyes widen, his grip on Ranmaru’s arm borderlining painful. _Be careful._ It’s a demand. 

They look at each other, silently communicating, and then they turn back to Tokiya. It’s Yuki that speaks to him this time. 

_A leader says he’s one of your sons._ Tokiya freezes. _He looks like dad._ Yuki’s eyes flicker to Ranmaru’s. 

Tokiya’s grip is too tight on Ranmaru’s arm. He turns his head, looking at Ranmaru with wide eyes. _Are there more than one community?_

_’Ve never seen one, but it’s not crazy ‘t think there might be._

_Have they told you?_ Tokiya’s thought is the equivalent of a whisper. When Ranmaru stares blankly, Tokiya continues. _They said one of the leaders looks like you. Apparently he says he’s our son._ Ranmaru’s eyebrows raise. Tokiya’s look turns almost pleading. _We have to check, Ran. Please._

Ranmaru glances at Yuki and Yuuya, and then back at Tokiya. _If anythin’ fishy happens, we’re outta there, Toki._

_As long as we try._

Ranmaru gives a silent sigh. _We’ll try._

They don’t speak very much as they travel, and it’s mostly because it’s difficult to talk between all of them as they’re swimming, especially when Tokiya and Ranmaru are being led. 

Tokiya is stopped by a hand on the arm as Ranmaru takes in the group of mermaids they’ve been led to. It’s a smaller group than their last one, but the first thing Tokiya notices is that it’s quiet, and not immediately evident who the leaders are. But Tokiya’s eyes are searching the group for something (or rather, someone) specific, and he finds the boy that looks just like Ranmaru. 

Hiro is wearing a ‘bracelet’, though it goes from wrist to just before the inside of his elbow, covered in shells, though there’s a larger one in the middle. There’s a boy next to him, linked to Hiro by the pinky. It’s hard to tell, now that they boy is an adult, but Tokiya believes that it’s Alex- he has short, sunset orange hair and striking violet eyes. His posture is smaller, but his face is kind, far more tan than the man next to him, with a royal blue tail and he’s wearing a matching bracelet on the opposite arm that Hiro has it on. 

Tokiya rushes forward, ignoring Ranmaru’s silent sigh when he does, wrapping his arms around Hiro’s next.

 _My baby._ It’s a coo. Hiro’s free hand wraps around Tokiya’s back, but his other hand stays linked to Alex. _I’m glad it worked out._

Tokiya finally pulls back, though Ranmaru ends up nearing him with a hand on his hip- he’s not pulling back, but it’s an implied pressure. Tokiya finally releases him. 

Ranmaru and Hiro make eye contact for a long moment, and then when Hiro’s gaze breaks, he looks over at another man- a blonde, younger one, who moves ahead to stand near Hiro and Alex. Hiro looks at Ranmaru first, but then he looks over to Tokiya. 

_This is the other leader, Yamato. It’s Yama, Alex and I leading us._ Hiro gives a sheepish smile. _I would have invited you, but I wasn’t sure where you guys were._

Tokiya smiles, but he squeezes Ranmaru’s hand. He was very proud- almost beaming with it. _That’s alright. I’m glad to see you succeed, Hiro._

_I found others, alone, and I thought that this was a way to help them._

_I think it’s a wonderful idea. How long have you been in charge?_

_It’s been years. Alex and I started, and Yama is much newer._

_Thank you. For taking in Yuki and Yuu._

_Anyone’s welcome._ Hiro’s smile comes easier. _Especially anyone without a place to go. ...Family, yeah?_ Hiro’s smile drops, and an almost sheepish look returns. _Literally, sometimes._

Tokiya gives a silent laugh, looking over to Ranmaru. Ranmaru looked just as proud as Tokiya was sure he did.

When Tokiya glances back at Hiro, he gets another thought from him. 

_If you and dad ever need anywhere to go, you’re always welcome in our community._

Tokiya smiles. _You sound like a great leader, Hiro. Thank you._

They don’t stay long that night, but Tokiya is fast to speak to Ranmaru about how happy he is, to know where three of their kids were. 

_I wouldn’t mind joining their community-_ Tokiya muses. _But not yet, I don’t think. I don’t think that they’d actually want us… me… hovering over them. But it feels like a nice option to have._

Ranmaru nods. _I don’t think we need another community yet. But yer right._ The thought turns teasing. _I think all three ‘a ‘em would appreciate you not bein’ up their ass the whole time, yeah?_

Tokiya gets quiet for a moment, and then he grins, just a bit. _A few visits probably wouldn’t hurt, though._

Ranmaru rolls his eyes, but Tokiya can almost hear Ranmaru’s laugh in his head. 

They do start going a bit more frequently- and as far as most of the community seems to be concerned, Ranmaru and Tokiya are part of it. Thankfully, they’ve both been accepted. 

Tokiya thinks it’s nepotism. Ranmaru thinks Tokiya is highly overestimating what it takes to be accepted into a mermaid community. 

And then comes the first time in their entire relationship that Ranmaru had fallen _sick_. Tokiya was besides himself with worry when he wakes up to Ranmaru, across the cave from him, looking almost yellowish. His tail (and body) seems to be completely limp, and the red of his tail is too dull. Tokiya moves towards him, and Ranmaru just manages to lift his hand. 

“Don’t.” Ranmaru’s voice is hoarse. “‘M sick. You get close, you catch it, too. Shouldn’t even stay in the cave.”

“Are… Are you okay?” Tokiya’s voice breaks. He’s pulled himself up, resting on his hands and his bent tail. 

“I’ll be fine.” Ranmaru groans. “‘Member you apologizin’ ‘bout missin’ our date ‘cause ‘a yer… flu? I think? Same thing. Gonna be miserable fer a few days, but I’ll be alright ‘t be near by tomorrow.”

“Should I… where should I go… Ran? Is it really okay to leave you so… sick?”

Ranmaru both waves and lowers his hand, slapping it on the water. “Go ‘t the community. They aren’t very far ‘n you know yer way there ‘n back, yeah? Y’can come back tonight ‘r tomorrow mornin’. Should be fine then. But it’s hell, Toki. I don’t want you gettin’ it.” 

Tokiya’s shoulders curl in, and his head ducks as he plans his next move. His voice is no more than a mumble. “I’m not leaving longer than tonight. And then if I get it, so be it.”

Ranmaru sighs, but then he lets out a soft grunt of affirmation. 

Tokiya is hesitant to leave the cove, but he finally does, after moving no more than a few inches every minute. He’s not much faster, swimming his way to the community. He’s stopped, just as he’s nearly in it, because there’s movement that’s unfamiliar. 

The sight of the merman was different, too, and Tokiya realizes that the man is _stalking_ him before he even realizes who the man is.

Hari.

It’s a thought, but Tokiya can’t get it across because he can’t catch a good sight of Hari’s face- beyond being able to see the predatory snarl, and the sharp teeth and bright, nearly glowing eyes- the claw, and the flare of his tail. 

And then he lunges at Tokiya, managing to just catch his side. It isn’t a deep wound, but it hurts Tokiya deep into his chest. 

Tokiya can’t tell the other two mermaids swimming up behind him, already getting into their defensive forms. Tokiya is looking at Hari with wide eyes, like a wounded puppy. 

_Hari, please-_

Tokiya is pulled back before the next swipe. From a quick, panicked glance, Tokiya can tell that it’s Hiro. He can’t see the second, can only see the shapes that imply there is one, but he can only guess that it must be Alex. Tokiya can already tell that Hiro is planning to pass him back to Alex, to keep him out of the way, but he can’t hold Tokiya back when Tokiya rushes back towards Hari.

It’s stupid. Tokiya knows how _incredibly_ stupid he’s being. This is a cliche, this something that works in the kinds of movies that Tokiya used to roll his eyes to because it was just _so damn cheesy_. But Tokiya body blocks between Hari and Hiro, and he gets a claw pretty deep into his shoulder for his efforts- but even Hari has to stop when Tokiya just lets it hit. 

He’s confused. Tokiya can only turn his head- Hiro really did look like Ranmaru. Especially when his face is twisted in bewildered rage at Tokiya’s (presumably) suicidal actions.

_Please let me try to convince him to leave. Please don’t kill him._

_He hurt you!_

_I’ll convince him away from the community, please. Please don’t hurt him, Hiro._

Tokiya glances back at Hari. 

_You don’t know what you’re doing, Dad._ Hiro’s livid. Tokiya can tell. But he can also tell that he’s scared. _You’re already hurt. Just back away and let us handle this._

Tokiya has to turn his head back- Hari is clearly unhappy with not knowing what they’re discussing, gearing up to attack but afraid. Afraid to kill Tokiya. 

In his head, he understands that Tokiya may be protecting Hari because Hari was his son, but Hari wasn’t attacking Tokiya because if he killed Tokiya, the two behind Tokiya would kill Hari for sure. 

_Give me one minute. Let me try._

It’s so clear that Hiro doesn’t like this, but he stays silent as Tokiya tries to speak to Hari. 

_They’ll kill you._ Tokiya’s thought to his son is so soft. _There’s a community nearby, and if you enter it, they’ll kill you. Just go the other way- please. No one will follow you. Or hurt you. Just leave. Please. I’m not trying to get you hurt. I don’t want you hurt, Hari._

Hari sneers when Tokiya says his name, but he glances at the two obviously hostile mermaids behind Tokiya, and he very slowly backs up. Tokiya doesn’t move a muscle until Hari is completely gone from sight, and then his entire body slumps, and the sobs that rack his whole body begin. He can barely even tell where he’s hurt or how badly because it feels like _everything_ hurt. 

He knew that Hari was aggressive. That that was something that happened- something he (hoped) he wasn’t in control of. That Hari was bound to be like that. But Hari was his _son_. And his son had just tried to kill him. 

Hiro moves to him quickly. Alex moves, a bit more hesitantly, to his other side. And while Alex does carefully touch Tokiya’s arm on the side that Hiro isn’t on, though Hiro is much less hesitant- only stopping long enough to tell where Tokiya’s injuries were. 

_Why isn’t dad with you?_

_He’s sick._ Tokiya’s thought is weak. It’s hard to think. Hard to turn his head. _I’m going back anyways._

 _I’ll take you._ Hiro’s thought is serious. It’s clear that he can tell how hard it is for Tokiya to form any thoughts. _I’ll tell him what happened. Least what I can._

Hiro looks up, to Alex, above Tokiya’s curled body. Alex nods, and they carefully begin to move Tokiya back to the cave. 

Ranmaru wouldn’t be thrilled that Tokiya was going to get himself sick- or that he was bringing two others that were susceptible, but…

Tokiya couldn’t really fool himself into believing that going back _wasn’t_ the right option right now. Even sick, Tokiya can’t imagine that Ranmaru wouldn’t want to be there for Tokiya during this. 

He hopes.

Tokiya manages to pull back, just a bit, as they’re getting close to the cave. 

He looks at Hiro and his thought is tired. He’s cutting off Hiro’s thought, but he doesn’t stop. _I should bandage here._ Tokiya swallows back another sob. _Don’t want to worry him. Or overwork him._

Hiro gives an uncertain look to Alex, who gives a sob that’s just as hesitant. Hiro settles Tokiya on the ground, Alex already off to search for something. After less than a moment, they’ve switched places- because Alex seems to be a bit newer. Unfamiliar with quite a lot of the ocean, as even Tokiya himself is. 

But the fact that Alex is a newer mermaid comforts Tokiya. The fact that he’s an adult. 

The fact that Hiro waited.

Tokiya closes his eyes, leaning against the rock Hiro had set him by. He’s still shaken up, and he’s very close to the cave, and he can’t quite keep his chest still as Hiro comes back with the moss to bandage him up. They don’t speak to him, but Tokiya doesn’t think he has the capability to respond and they don’t seem to be expecting it. 

And then Tokiya hears his name- clearly said by Ranmaru, and he starts. Ranmaru is hesitant, and clearly still very sick, but he’s managed to drag himself out of the cave to catch sight of Tokiya. 

_How?_ Tokiya’s surprise is slowly growing into worry, even as the pain is finally beginning to show itself. His shoulder was a bit nasty, but his side wasn’t that bad. It was nothing compared to the last time he had gotten really hurt. 

_Felt weird. Echolocation, too. Lot’sa people outside. What happened?_

Ranmaru’s face gets focused when Hiro catches sight of him, and Tokiya thinks that Hiro is explaining as much as he can. 

When Ranmaru’s eyes flicker to Tokiya’s face, Tokiya gives him a name. _Hari._

It says enough. Ranmaru’s face turns careful. Guarded. But a bit pained. And his eyes focus back on Tokiya’s face. Tokiya can read his expression. 

_I’ll come to you. When they’re done._

Ranmaru doesn’t seem to have an easy time holding himself back, but he does. Hiro had already been mostly done, and Tokiya’s still on the edge of panicking, holding himself back just enough to get through this moment. Hiro finally pulls back. 

_You’re both not going good._ Hiro’s face is uncertain. _We should set up a guard. Until dad’s better._

Tokiya’s head turns, to look at Ranmaru. _They want to set a guard for us._

_I dunno if I can defend you, Toki. ...If Hari’s still there… might be better._

Tokiya’s face turns uncertain now, too. _...Ran said yes._

_I’m leaving Alex here for now. I’d stay myself…_

_You don’t want to send him alone, and you’re a leader._ Tokiya manages a small, flickering smile. _I understand._

_I’ll be fast._

Alex pulls a face when Hiro explains his plan to Alex- but after Hiro reaches out to squeeze Alex’s hand, his face reluctantly softens. Hiro dashes off, and Tokiya only watches until he can’t see Hiro and then he carefully worms his way around Alex, to make his way to Ranmaru. 

When Tokiya curls into Ranmaru, there is no warning that Ranmaru is sick. Ranmaru only wraps his arms around Tokiya. 

_I can’t get back up right now._ Ranmaru’s thoughts are soft. _But it’s easier ‘t think than ‘t talk right now._ Ranmaru holds him tighter, being careful of his wounds. _I think that yer gonna get sick, Toki, but I really don’t wanna let you go right now._

 _It’s fine._ Tokiya’s tone is sad. Shaky. Borderline hysterical. _I want to be with you right now. But I need a minute._

If Tokiya were speaking, his voice would break. But as it is, he buries his head in Ranmaru’s chest and he resumes his earlier sobs. Ranmaru can only hold him. 

Tokiya feels Ranmaru’s head lift at some sort of provocation, but he lowers his head again only a moment later. Ranmaru manages to catch sight of Tokiya long enough to speak to him. 

_Not tryin’ ‘t make you talk yet, but just ‘t let you know- Hiro sent Yuki ‘n Yuu._

Tokiya has to lift his head at that, his eyes a bit wide and his expression worried. _You don’t think they’ll be hurt? ...I don’t want… I don’t want anyone hurt but I can’t handle…_ Tokiya’s thoughts are jumping around wildly. If he weren’t underwater, the tears in his eyes would be worse. 

_Ssh, calm down, babe. I warned ‘em not ‘t get too close- ‘n Hiro told me he was lookin’ out. ‘T make sure no one was watchin’ any ‘a you when goin’ towards our cave. They’ll be okay._

Tokiya goes limp in Ranmaru’s arms. His crying is softer and almost nonexistent under the water, but it still takes him quite some time to finally speak to Ranmaru. 

_I couldn’t let him die. He attacked me without a second thought- whether he recognized me or not. But I still couldn’t do it. But I couldn’t let him get hurt, Ran. They’re all my babies. How… how could I let my children hurt each other?_

_He hurt **you** Toki. He’s gone. It’s not his fault, ‘r yers, ‘r mine. Sometimes they just… turn out bad. ...We can’t talk too much about this right now. Yer hurt, ‘n I’m sick, ‘n we really don’t need ‘t fight, ‘r argue. ‘N I don’t want ‘t make you feel worse. …’N I’d bet that tomorrow yer already gonna be sick. So let’s just sleep, babe. We’ll really talk about this later._

Tokiya curls smaller, ignoring the pain of his injuries, and his tail curls with Ranmaru. Ranmaru’s return is weak, but he still does- because sleeping underwater means they need to anchor. Preferably tighter, but this was the best they could manage.

Tokiya does get sick the next day. Yuki and Yuu don’t get too near them until the day after Tokiya’s contagious period, with the exception of passing Ranmaru fish. Tokiya’s sickness really takes it out of him, considering that he’s now both sick and hurt. 

It takes nearly a week for Tokiya to actually begin getting fully better, though Ranmaru is better by day three and he releases Yuki and Yuu- though Tokiya notices how worried they are. 

They stay underwater for almost the full week, only going back up into the cave when Tokiya’s sickness is completely gone and he’s just stuck healing. 

“Was it really just echolocation that let you find us? You had such good timing. We could have been fish.” Tokiya mumbles. “And what if we were dangerous?”

“We don’t really ‘ave a physical connection. It’s sorta like echolocation- only with you. If you die, I would know. But when yer real hurt ‘r real upset, I start not feelin’ right. ‘S how I woke up ‘t go find you with the community. It was just a real off feeling. Got far enough ‘t the edge ‘t see yer tail.”

“...Being sick was terrible- but I… I don’t think I could handled myself without you.”

“I know.” Ranmaru sighs. “‘N I hate it. But I know. ‘S why I didn’t force you away.”

“I know I’m not healed yet but… we’re already on the topic.” Tokiya’s voice trembles. “I’m scared that if Hari comes back, I’m not going to be able to stop him from getting hurt.”

“Toki…” Ranmaru runs his hands over his face. “I know you want the best fer ‘im- but he’s _dangerous_. ...Toki not a single one ‘a our other kids would’a ever hurt you, babe.”

“What about the ones that spied on us?” Tokiya’s voice breaks this time, and he has to bite on his lip to keep it from trembling. “They would have outed us out, wouldn’t they have?”

“...I dunno, Toki. …’N I know that community hurt you real bad, but I can only hope that none of ‘em helped. But Hari’s ready ‘t kill you just to do it.” Ranmaru’s hands cradle Tokiya’s face. “No one’s safe with ‘im around, Toki-”

“No. I will never give my permission to hurt him. He listened! He left!”

“He had no choice, Toki. ...But I’m not gonna go search ‘im out. If he stays away, if he listens-”

“He’s your son.”

“‘N I don’t like it, either, Toki, but your safety, ‘n the safety ‘a our other kids- of Hiro, ‘n Yuu, ‘n Yuki. ‘N heavin forbid he cross another one our kids ‘n hurt them. Or anyone else- it’s not your fault and it’s not his- I don’t know know ‘t say it right because there ain’t a good way ‘t say it but he’s not fixable.”

Tokiya hangs his head, and he cries. Ranmaru presses his lips against Tokiya’s forehead.

“It’s hard. I know it is. You’re a really fuckin’ sweet person, Toki. But we just need ‘t be careful.”

It takes about a year of nothing bad, nor anything significant happening before Tokiya curls up to Ranmaru and gives a sheepish laugh. “I know we’ve probably overpopulated the ocean by now, but-”

Ranmaru chuckles. “Trust me, Toki. If we kept makin’ kids every minute ‘a every day, we’d still barely make half ‘a the population. If you want another batch ‘a guppies, we can do that.”

“I’d like to try.” Tokiya smiles. “I never thought I’d be so into being a parent. And maybe it’s because there’s not much else to do, and my God guppies are probably the cutest thing I’ve ever seen-” Ranmaru snorts at that. “And making the guppies with you is also a _very_ enjoyable experience… and maybe I just like having babies that are… babies. I adore all of our children- every single one of them.” Tokiya’s fin flips up, splashing both of them with some water. “But they’re all grown. Look at Hiro! He’s so… adult.” Tokiya sighs. “I just want to _care_ for them again.”

Ranmaru kisses Tokiya’s forehead. “Y’don’t have ‘t explain yerself to me. Through all ‘a our bumps ‘n turns, kids ‘ve absolutely never been somethin’ I regret havin’, babe. ‘N I’d be more ‘n happy ‘t have more with you.”

Tokiya regrows his grin, though this one turns sly. “Guess we’d better get started then.”

It takes a few tries this time, but it isn’t long after that Tokiya’s woken up Ranmaru to bury the eggs. At this point, he likely doesn’t even need to- but they had started a pattern. Tokiya digs, Ranmaru covers. 

Tokiya is forbidden to hover over the eggs at all time of the day again- which was unfortunate, in his opinion. He’d much rather always be around the eggs- though they really don’t have any reason to believe that they aren’t safe. 

When it’s only a week and a half later, Tokiya does panic a bit. 

“They can’t be ready.” Tokiya’s nervous. “It’s too soon. Did… did I do something wrong?”

“It’ll be alright, Toki. They might be a ‘lil smaller, but if they’re ready ‘t leave, they’re ready ‘t leave. Go ahead ‘n make yer dam fer ‘em.”

“Are you sure? I always leave you on egg duty.”

Ranmaru chuckles. “I’ve got plenty ‘a time with ‘em later. I can see how much you like this.”

Tokiya does flash him an appreciative smile. 

This one is a group of six.

Tokiya looks up, his expression pure fear when Ranmaru moves closer. “What… what happened to the seventh?” 

Tokiya can feel his eyes tear up. He’s thinking of Hari. Tokiya’s lip trembles, and when a few of the kids notice, they start crying, all huddled up together against Tokiya’s side. 

“Ssh.” Ranmaru hushes him, stroking Tokiya’s cheek with his thumb. “Yer upsettin’ the guppies, babe. It’s fine. The last one was just a dud.”

“A… dud? Ranmaru that-”

“That’s not what I meant.” Ranmaru cuts him off. “It was totally empty. Nothin’ was ever in it. Didn’t even really grow, Toki, nothin’ happened. All we ever had was six- I promise.” Ranmaru leans forward, kissing his forehead. Tokiya slumps over, sighing. 

“Empty egg?”

“Empty egg.”

Now calmed himself, Tokiya starts the work of comforting the children he had panicked. There are two, that had been splashing around but are looking at Tokiya questioningly now, and there are four that are wailing besides him, upset at seeing Tokiya upset. 

When Tokiya starts humming, to try to calm the guppies now resting in his arms, on his chest, the other two splash themselves forward, interested at the noise. 

Tokiya actually gets four of them to sleep, but the other two, a boy and a girl, choose to use Tokiya as a jungle gym instead. Ranmaru doesn’t stop them, but he catches them before they wake the other sleeping children, until finally they realize that Ranmaru had no obstacles and they’re free to climb on him as much as they want. It brings a large smile to Tokiya’s face. 

When Tokiya and Ranmaru stay in the cave to watch over the little ones, as they teach and care for them, Hiro and Alex drop by to check on them. 

Tokiya had learned that Alex was a fairly shy but very caring kid. 

Er… young adult. 

For the most part, he spoke softly and not a lot, and even his thoughts were very soft. He was polite, and calm- until you riled him up. A passing mermaid had insulted Hiro one day, and Tokiya had been there to see it. Judging by the absolutely livid expression on Alex’s face, Tokiya was glad he couldn’t hear what was being said. But the rest of that day, Alex’s pinky had been locked with Hiro’s- Alex’s tail wrapping around Hiro’s any time they were still enough. 

But both Hiro and Alex had perked up, seeing the guppies. 

“Dunno what yer so excited about.” Ranmaru snorts, watching Hiro and Alex play with the friendlier ones. No one in this batch were _unfriendly_ but the girl, Mika, and the boy, Kenshin, were wild. They loved playing. The other four were gentler. Clingier. Alex preferred the softer ones, but Hiro was having fun playing with Mika and Kenshin. “Wasn’t all that long ago that you were one of ‘em, Hiro.”

“There aren’t really any kids in our community. Not a lot of couples.” Hiro looks up, giving a smile that’s a little _too_ innocent. “If you ever need some time to yourselves, there’s lots of mermaids- or us, that would definitely watch them for you.”

It makes Tokiya laugh- and it makes him laugh harder when Alex rolls his eyes and mumbles, “Subtle.”

Tokiya won’t take the children until they’ve confidently learned to swim- but once they have, they do start bringing the guppies over now and then, though it takes a very long time before Tokiya and Ranmaru actually leave them alone with anybody. It makes Tokiya feel better when Alex promises that he’ll be keeping an eye on them all. 

But one day, while crossing to go back home from the community, Ranmaru stills, holding his arm out, to stop Tokiya and the chain of guppies. Tokiya is immediately protective, holding the guppies behind him the best that he can. 

Tokiya’s heart breaks when he sees a shadow, circling them, because he knows it’s Hari. He looks the same. 

_Be careful, Ran._

_Try ‘t get outta ‘ere._

Ranmaru’s eyes only land on Tokiya long enough to say that sentence. Otherwise, his eyes follow the trail that Hari is making around them. Tokiya hates the thought of leaving Ranmaru, but he does try to take the guppies, moving slowly sideways. 

Hari lunges, to try to grab at one of the guppies, and Ranmaru reacts in time, slamming his body into Hari’s before he can grab one. Tokiya feels the guppies cradle into him and he turns so that the front of his body is facing Hari and the kids are behind his back. 

Tokiya has never seen Ranmaru like this. He looks incredibly large, the way his fins are stretched out- far larger than Hari. He looks, dangerous- deadly. The glow of his eyes are both terrifying and hypnotising. It’s something Tokiya hopes he never has to see again- particularly not out of necessity. 

It’s a fight, but Ranmaru makes too many mistakes- because he’s _not_ fighting. He’s defending. And Hari is so fast that Tokiya can’t try to get out of there with the guppies- trembling behind him. Tokiya’s mouth opens in a silent scream of Ranmaru’s name when Hari’s claws find their way into Ranmaru’s stomach and drag upwards. Ranmaru curls over, unable to move to catch himself. 

Tokiya is too frozen when Hari focuses on him- too focused on Ranmaru. On the terrible, horrible feeling he has. It’s telling him something is wrong. But of course something is wrong!

It’s Kenshin that breaks from the group, trembling head to fin- in what Tokiya thinks is both fear and rage, and he moves in front of Tokiya. 

To try to protect him. 

Luckily, this is where instinct finally kicks in as Tokiya’s rushes forward, pushing Kenshin behind him as he does. 

He never wanted to make this choice- but he would not be losing his children. He would not be losing his partner. If that meant needing to fight his own son, then so be it. 

Tokiya doesn’t kill him. He isn’t sure if he would have if he could- but he’s afraid that right now, he may have. He takes some fighting damage himself, but Hari takes enough of it to run from the fight. 

Tokiya may have lost, had they continued. But Hari wasn’t sure if he’d win.

It takes everything in him to go to his children first- but he needs to make sure they’re alright, even knowing that Ranmaru isn’t. 

Tokiya’s thoughts tremble in his children’s heads, but he can’t stop it. 

_I want all of you to hold onto me and **do not** let go._

When the kids are attached, many of them crying, wailing, shaking at his side- he finally goes to Ranmaru. It’s a deep wound. Ranmaru is hardly conscious. Tokiya does the best he can, though he had to drag Ranmaru through the water. Tokiya wants to go back to the cave- but he’s scared. He’s scared that he can’t take care of his kids and Ranmaru at the same time. With great reluctance, he brings Ranmaru to the community. 

Relieved isn’t a strong enough word when Ranmaru is given immediate help- though there’s a terror that flashes through him when Ranmaru is taken.

There are medics here, Tokiya reminds himself. Ranmaru is a part of this community. They will care for him. 

Hiro and Alex are quick to swim up to Tokiya- and Tokiya realizes that he’s still in his aggressive form and he doesn’t know how to stop that. Hiro is casting constant, worried glances towards Ranmaru as he’s brought away. Tokiya wants to go with him but he can’t. 

_What happened? How was dad hurt?_ There’s so much panic in Hiro’s tone.

Tokiya’s thought just sounds lost. _It was Hari again. He tried to hurt the kids- and he managed to hurt Ran. God, he almost got them. I just wanted to protect my son- I didn’t… I didn’t want anyone hurt, Hiro._

 _You’re hurt, too._ Alex’s thought is so gentle. Tokiya shakes his head. 

_I’ll care for that later. We have extra moss in the cave-_ Tokiya wasn’t sure if that were true. _But that’s where I want to take the kids now. I can’t defend them in the open and I- I need them. I need them near me. I know Ran is in good hands here._

Hiro glances back in Ranmaru’s direction, after Alex finishes filling him in. Yuu and Yuki are already hovering as close as they’re allowed to. It’s clear that Hiro wants to be there, too. And Alex won’t want to leave Hiro’s side. 

_We’ll get some people to escort you._ Alex’s thoughts are quiet. _I’m afraid it might not be Yuuya or Yuki._

Tokiya just nods. When he’s sent back, it’s with Yamato, and a man, smaller than most of the other mermaids, with blonde hair and a pink tail. They’re quiet on the way back to the cave, Tokiya’s guppies still hanging onto him. 

They leave after a quick parole around the cave, and Tokiya sets the guppies very far towards the end. 

“Ran’s going to be okay.” Tokiya’s voice shakes. “You’re all going to be okay, too.” Tokiya swallows hard, and he reaches out for Kenshin. “Your meaning was good, baby. I know that you meant well. But that was just too dangerous. If, heaven forbid, we ever get in a situation like that again, I need you to stay behind me and your dad. We don’t ever want anything to happen to any of you. And dad’s going to be okay. He’ll be back in a few days. And I know you’re all worked up right now, but I want you to try to get some rest.”

Tokiya kisses all six of them on the top of the head, and then he forms a protective circle around them. 

It isn’t until all of the children are asleep that Tokiya goes to the end of the cove- and he cries. He cries so hard that it’s silent. 

Tokiya doesn’t sleep that night. He’s too afraid to. 

And he can’t stop thinking about Ranmaru. And then fear crosses over him- it would be devastating if Ranmaru didn’t make it. Tokiya wasn’t sure how bad the wound was. 

But if Ranmaru didn’t make it- Tokiya would die, too. 

Tokiya glances over at the kids, and he sobs harder, curling in on himself. 

In the morning, he has four crying children, when they catch him. Mika is quieter than she normally is- more subdued, but Kenshin is trying his best to comfort the others because Tokiya is currently unable to. 

When it’s around mid-day, Tokiya senses movement. 

“The back of the cave. All of you. Go.” He hisses. They’re still crying loudly, and it breaks Tokiya’s heart, but he’s scared he’s going to need to defend them. He doesn’t relax the way he’d like to when he recognizes the faces, because Hiro and Alex are supporting Ranmaru, and Yuki and Yuu aren’t far behind them. 

“Ran, what in the hell are you doing?” Tokiya’s eyes widen when Ranmaru breaks the water, as Alex and Hiro bring Ranmaru into the cave. Ranmaru looks exhausted. In pain. Tokiya hates it. Ranmaru’s eyes glance down to Tokiya’s still torn up chest, but Tokiya’s voice is serious. “I’m not your concern right now, Ran, you’re still very hurt.” Tokiya looks up at Hiro. 

“He’s patched up.” Hiro comments, but now he’s eyeing Tokiya’s wounds, too. “But he was worried about you and the guppies.”

“And so were we.” Alex says, in his soft, gentle voice. “It’s why we’re all here. And staying in the cave alone isn’t safe- if you were attacked, you’re hurt and you’re with children. Yuki and Yuuya will be standing guard until the both of you are properly healed.”

“When was the last time you ate? And weren’t you supposed to patch yourself up?” Hiro narrows his eyes at Tokiya. It’s an almost identical expression to Ranmaru’s right now. And then Hiro’s eyebrows furrow. “I don’t want to lose you dad. I don’t want to lose either of you.” Hiro’s voice breaks at the end of his sentence. “I just got the both of you back in my life. I’ve got you guys, and Alex- Yuki, Yuu, Yama, the guppies and everyone back at the community… I don’t want to lose any of you. This should be a good thing. We should all be a family. And I want to hold onto that.”

Tokiya’s expression falls, soft in the worst kind of way. One of the babies, still towards the back of the cave, are moving themselves further, making wailing noises- the kind that human babies weren’t able to make. She’s crawling to Ranmaru. Alex picks her up, just to keep her from climbing up Ranmaru. They were the size of small children- too small to comfortably keep in the corner of the cage- but right now they were all _scared_. Alex does manage to calm her crying quickly, and he blocks Ranmaru from sight, the best he can, trying to calm all of the children. 

Tokiya moves enough to hug Hiro, too tightly for the injuries he has but he ignores them. Yuki and Yuu have raised, settled on the outside of the cave, like bookends. Or gargoyles on buildings. Hiro is more careful in the hug, but Tokiya ruffles his hair when he pulls back. 

“We already told Yuki and Yuuya that dad was in charge.” Hiro’s voice just misses scolding, but it’s clear that’s what it’s supposed to be. “Whatever he says goes.” 

“Huh?” Tokiya glances down at Ranmaru. He’s been eerily quiet- but that mostly scares Tokiya. How much pain was he in? 

“We made a deal before we came over.” Yuki speaks up.

Yuu finishes. “If you hadn’t slept, or hadn’t taken care of yourself, we’d help him make sure you do it.”

“And had I done that?” Tokiya’s attention is fully on the twins now. Yuu shrugs. 

“We would have still helped. But-”

“Ya didn’t.” Ranmaru grunts. “‘N I’m in charge now.”

Tokiya sighs. 

“I’m going to see to it myself that you’re patched up.” Alex says. Alex had always been polite and respectful- and he still is now, but there isn’t any room for argument in his tone. 

It was strange, being ordered around by his children. 

And technically, Alex was his kid, too. 

Tokiya doesn’t fight it, and most of the reason is because it’s Alex, and because he’s upset the kids enough already. 

“We won’t take them now.” Alex says, his voice only loud enough for Tokiya to hear. “But I think that when Hiro and I visit you in the next few days that you should let us watch the children for you. I don’t mean to impose in your relationship, by any means, but I think it might be good for the two of you to spend some time together alone. ...It was an awfully close call.” Alex’s eyes focus down on his own hands as he works with the moss. “...We saw you. Crying. And I know that taking the kids right now would hurt you but… as soon as you can handle it.”

Tokiya manages a small smile. “Thank you, Alex. That’s very kind of you.”

Alex gives him a bit of a muted smile. Tokiya and Alex are both fully aware of Hiro and Ranmaru’s stares, but Alex finishes bandaging him. 

“Why don’t the two of you go grab some food? I can’t imagine Tokiya or the younger ones have eaten yet.” Alex says softly, glancing to Yuki and Yuu. When they nod, Alex nods as well, in thanks. “Hiro, why don’t I join you in watching over the kids for a moment?”

Alex makes eye contact with Tokiya- a clear indication that he was giving Tokiya a few moments. Tokiya nods. 

He was appreciative. 

When Hiro and Alex are towards the back of the cave, playing and entertaining (and in some cases, calming) the children, Tokiya goes to Ranmaru. Ranmaru stretches out an arm and Tokiya very carefully lowers himself down. He’s careful to not touch too much of Ranmaru’s side, though the end of Ranmaru’s tail catches Tokiya’s in something that’s almost an anchor. 

“I don’t like that yer closest ‘t the mouth ‘a the cave.” Ranmaru grumbles. 

“I can move easier than you can.” Tokiya says quietly. 

“And yer also runnin’ off ‘a no sleep.”

“I’ll be fine.” Tokiya presses a kiss to Ranmaru’s jaw, and then he sighs. “This is another moment that I think we should wait to bring up anything really serious- but I’m very, very glad that you’re going to be alright, Ran. I don’t know what I would have done.” Tokiya’s expression gets darker. “Or Heaven forbid I went, too, with you- I know that our children would be found, I just shudder to know what would have found them _first_.” 

“It’s alright. ‘Cause I’m not leavin’ yet.”

“You were so hurt.” Tokiya mumbles. “You are. I hate it.”

“‘N this is how I felt. ‘Specially the first time ya came hurt, ‘n you were worse ‘n I was.”

“We’ll… figure this situation out. Really talk about it when you’re getting better. And then we’ll just… be careful.”

Ranmaru grunts. “This ain’t happenin’ again.”

“Never again.” Tokiya agrees. 

They do get to talk about it, nearly two weeks later. In the middle of those two weeks, the kids often slept in between Tokiya and Ranmaru, but Tokiya thinks that even if it caused both of them some discomfort, it also was preferable to them sleeping away from Ranmaru and Tokiya. And then when the kids were finally taken to be watched over for a small amount of time, Tokiya was as healed as he was going to be and Ranmaru was doing much better. He still had some trouble moving quickly, or hunting, but he was absolutely positive that he’d be able to fully recover, and the closing wound was making Tokiya believe it. 

“So. Serious talk.” Ranmaru sighs. “We get this outta the way ‘n then we have a week all ‘t ourselves.”

Tokiya frowns, but he nods. “I… I want to defend Hari. I want to protect him.” Ranmaru’s expression turns wary, but Tokiya isn’t done. “But God, Ran. Watching him try to take one of our babies? A grown mermaid, trying to grab a defenseless child. They don’t even know how to hunt, for God’s sake! They barely know how to swim! And watching him hurt you that badly- in front of our kids. ...His father. ...I can’t protect him anymore, Ran, and it breaks my heart. But it’s not worth it. It’s not worth defending him knowing that he might have killed all of us if I hadn’t scared him off. That all of our kids would have been slaughtered like animals-” Tokiya can’t help his sob. “I can’t defend that. They’re children!”

Ranmaru pulls Tokiya closer. “We won’t chase after ‘im.” Ranmaru says grimly. “But Hiro ‘n I ‘ve talked about it. He’s gotta be a kill on sight, babe. ‘N we’re gonna get better with transport, too, fer a while. Yuu ‘n Yuki’ll be stoppin’ by ‘bout once a week, ‘n if we wanna just send the kids, ‘m sure Alex ‘n Hiro, ‘r that Yamato kid ‘r somethin’ ‘ll join ‘em, ‘r we will. No matter what, we’re gonna make sure that it’s not ever like that again. Kids ain’t ever gonna be in danger. It was too close ‘a call as it was.”

“Close call.” Tokiya says numbly. “I would give my life for any of my children- grown or young. But losing you? You’re my other half. The… _other_ father of my children. And if our lives weren’t bound, Ran, I still don’t think I’d last much longer than you. Our fates are entirely intertwined- and you _are_ my life at this point. ...As bittersweet as it is, that our lives are connected, particularly at their ends… I’m still glad that I will have you until the day I die.” Tokiya links his fingers with Ranmaru. “So you, getting hurt? That was a loss. Had I not been hit once. Had I managed to run away. Hell, had you nothing but a small scratch on you- that’s a loss. It’s not a close call, or a could be worse. That _is_ a worse-case scenario. I refuse to let my children get hurt, but not being able to help you, or go to you- watching you get hurt, Ran... “

Ranmaru’s hand rubs over Tokiya’s side. “Things were calm ‘til this. ‘N everyone in the community ‘s on our side. Everyone knows.”

“Ran… What… what if I’m the next one to run into him?”

“I’ll be there.”

“Will that really be easier for you?”

“...No. It won’t.” Ranmaru sighs. “He’s still my kid. ‘N it still hurts. But ‘s just like you said. He tried ‘t hurt you. Fuck, if he’d’ve gotten Kenshin-” Ranmaru lets out a shaky sigh. “I’m not lettin’ ‘im hurt anyone. ‘Course, selfishly, I really fuckin’ hope we aren’t the ones ‘t deal with ‘im. ‘N if fer some strange reason yer alone when you see ‘im- you dash ‘t the community, ‘r back ‘t the cave. Whatever yer closest to- ‘n you find someone ‘t take care ‘a ‘im. You don’t need to, Toki. You _can’t_ protect him. But that doesn’t mean you’ve gotta kill ‘im.”

Tokiya gets silent for a long moment. “I… think we’ve discussed enough. I’m exhausted.”

“Yer right.” Ranmaru relents. “Let’s just chill ‘n take a nap.”

Tokiya gives a very weak laugh. “I’d like that.”

It’s two days later that Tokiya’s eyes light up in a very cautious way. 

“Can we take a risk?”

“...A risk?”

“I want to go back to our beach.”

Ranmaru stops. He seems to really weigh the options- but he knows that it’s been long enough to stop parole and no one in the old community really liked that beach. 

They weren’t very fond of humans, after all. 

It’s only a few hour journey, and Ranmaru promises he knows how to get back to their cave. The first place they visit is their cove. It hasn’t even been touched. 

Of course, there’s a possibility it still had been visited- but Tokiya would like to believe that it hasn’t. And it’s a perfectly safe belief because they wouldn’t be returning here to stay for any long period of time. 

They get to the beach just in time to see the orange haired father, kneeling besides a grave. Ranmaru can’t stop Tokiya in time for Tokiya to swim closer- close enough to be seen. 

Because Tokiya has a terrible, terrible feeling. 

“W-what?” The man stumbles to his feet and steps back, afraid. Tokiya tilts his head, to see the grave. It’s clearly only a headstone, though it’s well taken care of. 

**Alex Jinguji.**

“You’re mourning?” Tokiya’s words seem to take the man back further- but he answers, in a voice that seems to be too high pitched. Especially when Ranmaru must reveal himself, hovering over Tokiya. 

“It’s… he’s, my… my son.”

“And the blue haired man?” Tokiya feels a cautious grip on his arm. Tokiya shouldn’t know this much. 

“My… my husband?”

Tokiya nods. He stares at this man for a very long moment. “What is your name?”

“Ren.” Ren’s voice is soft. 

“And your husband?”

“Masa-to?”

Tokiya nods. “I am Tokiya.” Tokiya pauses for a long second, a plan formulating in his head. “Please come back to this part of the beach tomorrow at this time.”

“I am- I’m always here.” Ren’s smile is sad. His eyes are so dark. 

Tokiya nods, and he submerges. Ranmaru doesn’t begin his lecture until they’re headed back- which also surprises Ranmaru. 

_Toki, what the fuck was that?_

Tokiya gives him a sheepish smile. _I want to go talk to Alex. ...His parents are alive. And they think he’s dead, Ran. I need to give him a chance- to at least let them know he’s not. Right?_

_I dunno, Toki._

_I won’t be dragging him. Or surprising him. I will be telling Alex that I will happily lead him to his parents if that’s something he’d like to do. I won’t even tell him that his father mourns daily at his grave unless he agrees. But what if he does, Ran? What if he could help that man’s suffering, by simply letting him know he isn’t dead? Put any of our children in their place, Ran. I would be heartbroken._

Ranmaru gives a silent sigh. _We can try. But we’re only tellin’ ‘im. No convincin’ ‘r trickin’ ‘r anythin’ else._

_I won’t. I promise, Ran._

When they get back, both Hiro and Alex are shocked to see them. Hiro seems to have a new permanent accessory, because Mika seems to have attached herself to his shoulder. 

_Alex. I’d like to speak with you._ Tokiya’s expression is a gentle seriousness. _I’ve… I’ve visited the old beach. Where you used to live._ Alex’s eyes widen, and there is some fear. _What did you feel about your parents?_

 _I loved them._ Alex’s voice is a bit scared. _I left too quickly to say goodbye- but it wasn’t because of them. ...Did something happen to them?_

_Not at all. ...Your father, Ren, seems to wait by the beach. I’m not sure for how long, or how often, though it sounds like it is a regular occurrence. He’ll be there tomorrow. Around this time. Ran and I could take you, if you’d like._

_How? He can’t-_ Alex’s eyes widen. Ranmaru gives Tokiya a wary look. _He can’t see me like this._

_Why not? I revealed myself to him a mere few hours ago. He was… surprised. But he didn’t take it unwell. ...I think he’d really appreciate seeing that you’re alright, Alex. And I mean it._

Alex frowns. Hiro is watching his face, concerned and confused. And then Alex nods. _I’ll try it._

_Then Ran and I will be by tomorrow._

The next day, Hiro and Alex are ready to leave. Tokiya and Ranmaru had both expected Hiro to tag along and neither man was truly surprised. 

It’s quiet as they travel, because Alex is nervous, Hiro isn’t sure what the right way to comfort him is, and Tokiya and Ranmaru have nothing to say to him about it. 

Tokiya’s secretly glad he’s going to. 

Tokiya hopes it will be good for both of them. 

Ren is waiting on the beach when they enter. Tokiya surfaces first, mostly to show Alex that it’s fine. 

“If you don’t mind my asking- why did-” Ren’s question is cut out completely when his eyes find the new surfacing figure. Well, figures. But his eyes land and stick on Alex. It’s such a quick move, when Ren throws himself into the water on his knees to wrap his arms around his son. He presses kisses to his temple, squeezing him tightly. Hiro makes no moves to stop Ren, but he’s startled. “Oh, Alex.” Tokiya thinks Ren might be crying. He’s soaked and he hasn’t pulled away. Alex manages to hold him back with one hand. “I thought- I… I should get Masa.”

Alex is quiet, but he doesn’t stop Ren as Ren forcibly pulls himself away. Ren’s look is pleading, though Tokiya isn’t sure that he means for it to be.

“Please stay, Alex. Just for a moment.”

“I will.” Alex reassures quietly, his eyebrows drawn in. 

Ren’s voice is almost inaudible when he looks at Tokiya, who is just about to duck back into the water to give them some space. 

“Thank you.”


End file.
